You Have One Day to Kill a Snake or Python Hunting Season is a Failure

The idea of the government asking people to take there hunting equipment out into the Everglades and swamps of Florida to end the lives of "reptiles of concern like" may not have been the most humane thing, but boy were we excited. We mean, these snakes could kills us and our young children and our small yappy dogs, and damned if we were going to let these no good slitherers eat the Trixie Von Barkenstiens and Captain Puggles of South Florida like they were cocktail wieners.

But Mother Nature had other plans. She plagued us with a horribly cold winter, well for us anyway. I man, we had to wear sweaters and closed toed shoes! Snakes though, no one makes sweaters in their size and they don't even have feet to put closed toed shoes on.


So officials estimate that almost 50 percent of the alien reptiles including Indian and African rock pythons, green anacondas and Nile monitor lizards died due to the cold.

So there weren't too many to send to the big swamp up in the sky, so not a single invasive python was trapped by a hunter during the special hunting season. The hunting season ends tomorrow, so there's still one more day to kill a snake before the entire thing is a deemed a failure. There's surely a few more out there, and the very life of Snuggles the chihuahua could be depending on it.

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Kyle Munzenrieder