News Roundup

Riptide had a lovely Thanksgiving. Short Order cooked an amazing turbaconducken, Crossfade lead us in musical prayer, and step-sibling Nude Celebrity Death SUV brought tons of bargain bin wine, which it proceeded to chug relentlessly. Anyway, we are back today in a somewhat tryptophan impaired effort.

  • Nilo Juri was convicted on nine felonies and four misdemeanors. Does this mean he won't be able to offer his political insite to our readers anymore? [Herald]
  • The new Frost Art Museum on FIU's campus opens up on Saturday. Note to the Lowe: You best step up your game. [Herald]
  • Sean Mother Fuckin' Penn interviewed Raul Mother Fuckin' Castro, and Raul said he'd have no problem meeting Obama at Gitmo. [Local 10]
  • A hooker killed some john. I just feel sorry for the journalist who spent her thanksgiving writing about this. [Herald]
  • Go ahead and guess which VIP was at Madonna's concert Wednesday? You'll never get it right. Oh, you guessed A-Rod. Never mind then. [Boston Herald]
  • Pharell was there too, and Madonna wore those lensless glasses girls at Poplife wear when they want you to think they're smart, classy girl who would rather end the evening reading Tolstoy instead of going home with you, but then they always do. [Atl Nights]
  • Cubans and Catholics and Sainthood and other things I don't understand because everytime I went to church with my Catholic grandmother I was really, really scared and never understood why I didn't get a cracker like everyone else. [Herald]
  • "

    Thanksgiving night marked the second robbery shooting at a South Florida Dunkin' Donuts store in a 24 hour period." I thought one of the perks of working at a donut shop is that there is a police officer on hand 24/7? [CBS4]

--Kyle Munzenrieder

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.