Man Arrested for Sex With Miniature Donkey: "Florida is a Backwards State"

Carlos Romero, a 31-year-old farmhand from Marion County, Florida, was recently arrested for committing a sexual act with a donkey, but when he was arrested, he told deputies that "Florida is a backward state, and people frown on zoophilia here."

Wait, are there forward-thinking, progressive states that don't frown on zoophilia? We just checked with California and Massachusetts, and they said, "Uh, no, we totally frown upon sexy time with animals, too."

According to the arrest report obtained by The Smoking Gun, someone walked in on Romero with the donkey on August 15. The witness walked by the room that Romero used to sleep in and noticed the lights were on. He peaked through the window and saw Romero shirtless with his pants down leaning up behind the donkey. It appeared that he was having intercourse with the animal.

Romero noticed he was being watched, so he pulled up his pants. He opened to door of the room and pushed the donkey out.

About a month later a detective contacted Romero to investigate the report. Romero admitted that he had used his own hand and spit to make sure that the mini-donkey's ...uh... donkey lady parts were clear of debris, like wood shavings.

Romero than told the investigator that he gets aroused by seeing animals in heat and mating.

If you're not already frowning upon this, well, maybe don't read the next excerpt from the police report:

Defendant stated he stands behind the donkey, scratches her withers and masturbates. Defendant stated he likes the way the fur feels on his testicles and stated this his penis may have come in contact with the donkey's vagina by accident and his semen may have splattered inside the donkey by accident. Defendant recalls masturbating with the donkey 5 or 6 times.
Oh, good Lord, we are frowning so hard about this. Call us backwards if you want, but we're glad we live in a state where this is frowned upon.

Romero was arrested earlier this week on misdemeanor charges of sexual activity with an animal.


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Kyle Munzenrieder