What are you doing tonight? According to Facebook, there's a good chance you'll either eat a mixture of your tears and the last melted spoonfuls of a carton of rocky road ice cream or get drunk with your friends while proclaiming, "Who needs a relationship when we have each other? Did that person over there just look at me? Do you think they're single? Oh my God!"
That's because, according to Facebook data, Miami is one of the worst cities in America to find love.
The Wall Street Journal asked Facebook for help determining which cities are the best and worst for finding love. Facebook replied by tacking how many people in the nation's 50 biggest cities changed their relationship status from "single" to "in a relationship" during a one-month period.
Miami came in sixth to last by that standard. Only San Francisco, D.C., New York, Los Angeles, and Atlanta were worst places to find love.
And that's not because so many Miamians are already in relationships. Miami had the fourth highest percentage of singles. Only Detroit, Los Angeles, and NYC have more.
As it turns out, all those singles don't really necessarily increase your chances either.
"Sometimes when you're in a big city and there are thousands and thousands of people you might find attractive, it becomes so overwhelming that you don't engage in the dating culture at all," Justin Garcia, a professor in the department of gender studies at Indiana University, told the paper.
Which might explain why your friend who lives somewhere in a town of 30,000 is happily married with three kids and you're still trying to finagle your way into Set every weekend.
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SHOW ME HOW
The cities where it's apparently easier to find love? Colorado Springs, El Paso, Louisville, Fort Worth, and San Antonio.
We guess when you're in a hopeless place, there really is nothing to do but find love.
The good news, though, is that this should make it easier for you to find a dumb, sorta sad, and desperate hookup tonight. Good luck with that! Bring a condom!