Columns

Dump the Cuba Travel Ban: Send in Howard Stern, Lindsey Lohan, Manny Diaz!

Fidel is a jerk. Raul is nearly as bad.

But what nailed the USSR will get Cuba. Let my people in!

The heads of foreign affairs committees in both houses of Congress -- Sen. Richard Lugar and Rep. Howard Berman came out together to say the 50-year-old ban should be lifted. Hell, Lugar is even a Republican.

After we lift the ban, we should send the following personalities to do their things there:


1. Howard Stern should talk porn all day and all night.
2. Lindsey Lohan should continue her run on the bank.
3. Scott Rothstein should be the Jewish avenger and Ponzi schemer he is.
4, Manny Diaz -- because the foremer mayor doesn't have anything else to do...and what the hell, he did a great job with downtown.
5. One of those Kardashian monsters. Cuz maybe then they'd disappear from the screen like Fidel.

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Chuck Strouse is the former editor in chief of Miami New Times. He has shared two Pulitzer Prizes and won dozens of other awards. He is an honors graduate of Brown University and has worked at newspapers including the Miami Herald and Los Angeles Times.
Contact: Chuck Strouse