| Humor |

Dumb Kid Steals Tomato Plant Because He Thought It Was Marijuana

Keep New Times Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Miami and help keep the future of New Times free.

Sometimes we really worry about the state of Florida's youth. Kids today are so dumb they can't even get high correctly.

A 15-year-old boy in Daytona Beach, Florida, recently got in trouble for stealing a tomato plant, which he only swiped because he thought it was a marijuana plant.

The tomato plant's owner returned home last Friday to see someone climbing out of her kitchen window with just the plant according to WESH. The woman tried to chase the teen but he made off with his leafy loot.

A few days later, she spotted the teen again while walking her kids to school and with the help of another woman managed to hold him until police arrived.

When asked to explain the theft, the teen told police he thought it was pot. Oh, come on kid! Don't tell the police that! Why would you do that? Just tell them you really wanted to make your own fancy catchup, but your parents refused to buy you your own tomato plant or something. Don't make it any worse.

For the record, this is a tomato plant:

This is a marijuana plant:

​Note that for the fact that they are both plants, they really aren't too similar.

This kid probably tries to get into a K-hole by stealing Special K cereal from the grocery.

Kid probably tries to do whippets from a vat of Kool Whip.

Kid has probably smoked a whole lot of oregano in his life.

Kid probably swears he gets hangover from root beer.

Kid probably stole his little sister's Smarties because he thought they were ecstasy.

Ah, kids today, so dumb.

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.

Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Miami.