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| Columns |

Crist Asks For A Grand Jury Investigation Into South Florida Shenanigans

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Memo to Miami politicos with dirt under your fingernails: It's time for that midnight flight to Bolivia. Just do it now.

The FBI fired the first warning shots earlier this month, busting three Broward politicians for corruption. Now, Gov. Charlie Crist wants a wide-ranging grand jury probe into the rest of South Florida's sordid political scene.

Crist held a conference at 12:30 this afternoon, demanding that the Supreme Court convene a grand jury to look into political kickbacks in Miami and Broward.

"Public officials have abused their powers gained by virtue of their positions," Crist writes in his petition, which you can read here. "There is a need to investigate this criminal activity."

Frankly, Riptide is of two minds about Crist's call for a grand jury.

On one hand, he's late as hell to the party. The FBI's been moving for years on the sting that brought down the three Broward politicos (councilman Josephus Eggelletion, school board member Beverly Gallagher, and former Miramar councilman Fitzroy Salesman).

Now that the federal probe is pulling in state lobbyists with wide-ranging ties to the governor's mansion (at least in past administrations), it looks disingenuous at best for Crist to put on his anti-corruption crusader hat.

But let's be honest here. You and I both know there's a lot more dirty dealing going on in the Sunshine State.

Who cares why Crist wants this grand jury? The chances of a legit investigation into South Florida corruption coming up empty are roughly equivalent to Kimbo Slice's shot at not getting his beard ripped off inside an MMA ring.

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