4

Classless DeShawn Stevenson Arrested For Being Drunk and Lost

Dallas Maverick and all-around shitty person DeShawn Stevenson done got himself arrested. What a pity.

Stevenson, who called the Miami Heat "classless" after game 6 and then showed up in Dallas the next day wearing a T-shirt that said "Hey LeBron! How's my Dirk taste," was arrested last night after he was found "wandering disoriented in an apartment complex" and didn't know where he was, according Dallas TV station KDFW4.

Stevenson, who couldn't play college ball because he got a mind-blowing 450 on his SATs, put up seven points per game against the Heat before drunkenly wandering off even further into obscurity. Though it's hard to believe the charges, considering how focused and aware he looks in his mugshot. It's the same laser vision that got him his sub-35 playoff shooting percentage.

It's a shame the photographer didn't move a step to the right, or he could have captured the backwards 'P' tattooed on his cheek in support of the Pittsburgh Pirates. He got it because he thinks if you stand far enough away, it looks like a 'P.' The guy's definitely got a future in management.

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.

Newsletters

All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories
    Send: