Top Five Reasons Taco Bell Might Actually Be More Dangerous Than MTV's Skins

MTV's latest series Skins aired its first episode last week (and its second last night) to the tune of a whole lot of controversy.

From CNN to MSNBC to the friggin' Today Show, comparisons likening the show to "child pornography" and claiming it's "like peer pressure on steroids" have been swirling, and major advertisers has even pulled their spots.

Now we're not really sure we see much cause for all the hubbub. So, without further ado, our top five reasons Taco Bell might actually be more dangerous than MTV's Skins.

5. Taco Bell may not be giving kids product on loan--and, incredibly, more product than they initially wanted--like the drug dealer in the first episode of Skins. But their wares are just as addictive as most drugs currently being sought out by the D.E.A. as any pothead who's made a 2am run for the border can tell you.

4. While Skins will be out of mind within three seconds of its inevitable cancellation with all its major investors pulling out, the specter of the Taco Bell Chihuahua continues to loom in the collective subconscious well after its own passing, convincing us that we too queremos Taco Bell.

3. Even if watching Skins does tear away at the youth's moral fiber, it pales in comparison to the stripping of your stomach lining that those heaping bags full of late-night 89-cent items off their Why Pay More Menu will result in.

2. Taco Bell caters to the widest possible audience. It includes the entire subset who's viewing this show. What does this mean? It means that kids watching Skins may be doing it while consuming Taco Bell ... Which is kind of like freebasing while shooting smack. (Spoiler alert: We just gave away the plot of episode three.) 

1. MTV attempts to pawn off Skins as insightful programming by taking what seem like compelling if incendiary plotlines and wrapping them in modern kidspeak to resonate with the youth. Taco Bell attempts to pawn off three recipes as a menu offering variety by taking those same three recipes and wrapping them in alternating layers of crunchy shell, flour tortilla, and melted cheese. When they finally try this with the cinnamon twists, they'll have gone too far.

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Paul Torres