Lil Wayne ain't sorry.
Just a few minutes ago, the Young Money maniac called up 99 Jamz's Felisha Monet to discuss his war with the Miami Heat and his now-infamous taunt: "Fuck LeBron! Fuck She-Wade!... And, and, and I fucked Chris Bosh wife!"
But when Ms. Monet confronted Weezy about dissing the NBA, the Heat, the Big Three, Mrs. Bosh, and the entire City of Miami, he was basically unrepentant.
"I don't apologize."
"Listen," the 99 Jamz DJ told Wayne, "you know you got the whole entire city up in arms. You know that, right?"
"I heard about that," the rapper croaked. "That's what I wanna clear up."
Trying to give Weezy an excuse and paraphrasing his diss, Money said: "You were vibin'. I'm pretty sure you had some things in your cup. And you said eff the NBA, eff Miami Heat, eff D-Wade, eff LeBron, eff Chris Bosh. And I effed his wife! Those were the comments you made, right?"
"Yeah," Wayne answered, audibly shrugging. "First of all, I didn't have a cup. I can't drink anything," he said, referring to the court-mandated sobriety that resulted from his 2010 gun conviction.
"Actually, I had a little too much to think that night," the rapper snickered, punning. "I had too many thoughts on my mind that night. But let me start off by saying that I don't apologize for that night. I don't apologize for bein' who I am. That's who I am. This is who I am. Yes, I did say those things."
For real, Weezy is only willing to say sorry to King James. "The only thing I do wanna take back from that night, I said eff LeBron. And I didn't mean to say that, because me and LeBron, we are cool. I'm really cool with his mom. We have a really good relationship. And that's my homie. But it just slipped out."
Slightly shocked, Monet asked: "That's the only thing you take back? You don't take back saying that you effed Chris Bosh's wife?"
The answer: an emphatic nope. He is sorry only about LeBron.
"Other than that," Wayne confirmed, "I don't take nothing back. And like I said, I don't apologize for bein' me. This is who I am."
"Now, do you want an explanation for where all that came from?" the rapper asked Monet.
"Absolutely," she replied, "I mean you said you effed the next man's wife... Is that even true?"
Dismissing the question, Weezy scoffed: "That ain't important. Actually, I was just havin' a conversation with Baby on the stage," he added, trying to minimize the significance of his disses. "That was my fans. I wasn't on a television show. I wasn't on a radio show. I wasn't in front of nobody's video camera. I was on stage at a... Who's party you say that was again?"
"It was a Lil Wayne party," the DJ eye-rollingly conceded. "Yes, it was."
And self-satisfied, Weezy douchily croaked: "Thank you, thank you. That was my party. And on my stage, I can say what I want, sweetheart."
Later, in a backhanded attempt at making peace with the people of Dade County, the Young Money maniac told Monet: "As far as the City of Miami, I do want to apologize for the misunderstanding or whatever has taken place that made everybody thinkin' I got something against the city. Because that's totally, totally, totally wrong. I mean, these people accepted me with open arms from Day One. Ever since I was a Hot Boy.
"This just totally sports, y'all. It ain't got nothin' to do with the City of Miami."
Calling Wayne on this weak distinction, the DJ wondered: "But can you understand why people in Miami would feel disrespected? I mean, you live here. You party here."
Still, Weezy wasn't really convinced that he'd hated on the entire MIA. "Uhh... I could understand if they Heat fans. Yeah, I can feel the Heat fans feeling disrespected. But as far as a person just bein' from Miami, thinkin' that I'm disrespectin' you, I'm here to say I'm not. Totally."
So... How 'bout it, Miami? Good enough? Who forgives Weezy?
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