Gramps Grand Opening Week: Dance Contest, No Name, Jacuzzi Boys, and More

Last Friday, The New York Times published a piece called "South Beach Without the Beach," touting the area's "underground" spots. If Crossfade had edited the piece, we would have given it the headline "Places Where New Yorkers Go When They Aren't In New York" or "A Lesson in Faux-thenticity."

Save for the Broken Shaker or the Foxhole, we know most locals wouldn't be caught dead at any of the places mentioned. It's the kind of lazy travel writing you get when you let press agents do the work for you.

See also:

-SPIN 's Basel Party at Gramps: A 25-Photo Recap

-Lars Finberg and Cop City/ Chill Pillars at Gramps: The 28-Photo Slideshow

-Interview: Owner Adam Gersten on Gramps Bar, Opening in Wynwood

If you want South Beach without the beach, you are going have to cross the causeway. (Imagine that!) And if you're visiting Miami, you'll have the perfect chance to check out where the real locals go when Gramps hosts its opening week, which started yesterday, but keeps going til Sunday.

Of course, Gramps has been open since Basel, but there are some good reasons to pretend you've never heard of the place before including the No Name party Friday (formerly at the Electric Pickle) and a live set by the Jacuzzi Boys.

No Name is bringing down Svengalisghost (L.I.E.S.) and Joe Lentini vs. Juan Telway set. Both sets should delve deep into underground house territory.

The following night, local favorites, Jacuzzi Boys, will perform live. In our frequent run-ins with frontman Gabriel Alcala, we know the Boys are working on a follow up to 2011's Glazin'. So perhaps there is a good chance you may hear new material. (We hope.)

Anyway, enough babbling, here's the full lineup for Gramps opening weekend:

Gramps Grand Opening Week

Wednesday, January 30
Heat Game Night
Come early for Happy Hour and stay to catch the Heat vs. Nets on our new TVs and in the luxurious air conditioning.
Happy hour 6 to 9 p.m.; Happier hour midnight to 3 a.m.

Thursday, January 31
DUH-HYPE presents Sloppy Seconds
Dance Contest: You can dance, huh?
First place wins 69 used paper dollars; second place wins uh baby.
DJs Juice is Loose & Catorce Leches
Happy hour 6 to 9 p.m.; Happier hour midnight to 3 a.m.

Friday, February 1
Happy hour 6 to 9 p.m.
Creepy movies in the courtyard 8 p.m.
Musical trivia 9 to 10 p.m.
Suede Dudes and Little Beard Live 10 p.m.
Yard games tournament 1 a.m.

NO NAME midnight to 4 a.m.
Special live performances by Svengalisghost (L.I.E.S.), Joe Lentini vs. Juan Telway (Schematic)
DJs L.Sangre, Romulo Del Castillo, Gio Ardito

Saturday, February 2
Jacuzzi Boys Live

Sunday, February 3
RELAX 3 p.m.
DJ DZA, Aramis Lorie, Gio Ardito
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Jose D. Duran is the associate editor of Miami New Times. He's the strategist behind the publication's eyebrow-raising Facebook and Twitter feeds. He has also been reporting on Miami's cultural scene since 2006. He has a BS in journalism and will live in Miami as long as climate change permits.
Contact: Jose D. Duran