We're not really sure what inspires reality TV cast members to think that a little airtime means they're qualified to belt it out for the masses. But we don't like it. They usually have no training, no stage presence and -- what's worse -- no talent.
Rumors began to spread this week that Kim Kardashian is the latest addition to the reality-star-turned-pop-star onslaught. Though she confirmed on her site that the song leak does not in fact feature her voice, there are talks that all the hype made her actually want to put out an album. Ugh.
Yes, she's beautiful. Yes, she gives us curvy women a good name. She can make you buy anything from a $10 water bottle to Quick Trim and her entire family is on E! on a weekly basis. But that doesn't necessarily qualify her to sing. She confirmed the voice below isn't hers, but we're not sure we believe Ms. Kardashian's claims.
The socialite turned renaissance woman really does own a piece of everything. She models, she "acts," she "writes." We've even seen Kim K.'s former BFF pawn off Paris-branded hair extensions in beauty stores. We saw her on TV, in sex tapes, and all over the tabloids, then she came out with an album that included her cougaring it up in this little ditty.
Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino
This man singlehandedly made "being extremely fit" synonymous with "being a douche." No, you don't need six-pack abs to get laid. But apparently you need 'em to write books, and now to be a "rap star." We didn't think it could be possible to have an entire song revolve around "Whoa, we've got a situation." But alas, with the power of autotune, anyone can get their tracks played at the club.
There's no use denying it: This humble blogger loved watching the train wreck that was The Hills. Heidi was just so innocent and sweet when it all started. We slowly began to feel worse for her as she became a Pratt and transformed from a blond beach babe to a botched Barbie doll recreation. But this song put it over the top for us.
She's cute, she's tiny, and she became known as that chick who has the most MySpace friends. She likes dudes and chicks, and gave 'em all a "Shot at Love." But when she started singing about hooking up with a DJ, she lost us. Okay, she lost us a long time ago.
Keep Miami New Times Free... Since we started Miami New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Miami with no paywalls.