Marco Rubio failed to land a top job at a once-great institution that is now a sad, messy parody of its former self (the national Republican Party) and now might be seeking a top job at another once-great institution that is now a sad, messy parody of its former self (the Miami Dolphins).
That's according to the New York Post, anyway.
This much is certain: Rubio has vowed he won't return to elected office anytime soon. He won't run for his Senate seat again, he won't accept a position as anyone's running mate, and he won't run for Florida governor in 2018. In fact, even before he pulled out of the Republican primary race, word was that Rubio would pursue some sort of cushy, high-paying private-sector gig if his bid failed.
The Post reports that the former college football player would like that cushy, high-paying private sector gig to be with the Dolphins.
Perhaps he'd be a good addition to the scouting team. He's great at evaluating hand size, an important factor for receivers. We bet the Fins would have never drafted Ted Ginn Jr. and his slippery paws under Rubio's watch.
Before you get too excited about the idea of Rubio in aqua-and-orange, the Post went ahead and dumped cold water on its own reporting.
“Nope, nothing to it. He is a huge fan, though," a Dolphins insider told the paper.
The situation would make for strange bedfellows, though.
One of Rubio's biggest financial backers was local billionaire Norman Braman, a former owner of the Philadelphia Eagles.
When Dolphins owner Stephen Ross tried to persuade Miami-Dade taxpayers to help pay for upgrades to the stadium formerly known as Sun Life, Braman was one of the loudest voices opposing the plan. Braman ended up winning the battle, and Ross ended up (mostly) paying for the upgrades himself.
Then again, Rubio has been a guest at the owner's suite at Dolphins games before. In any event, he won't be moving into the Fins' front office anytime soon.