It sounds like an elusive legendary creature -- much like a unicorn or a griffin. Maybe that's because it's named after the legend of modern mythology: Ron Burgundy.
But Ron Burgundy Great Odin's Raven Special Reserve Blended Scotch Whisky (or, as the famous anchorman himself likes to call it: Scotchy Scotch Scotch) is real.
Ron Burgundy is a 60 percent malt and 40 percent grain blend by Old St. Andrews Distillery in Scotland, featuring whiskies from Speyside, Highlands, and Islay. And, like Veronica Corningstone, the Scotch teased us with the fact that it existed just out of our grasp. Until now.
Ron Burgundy is now available at all Total Wine & More stores throughout South Florida, with a suggested retail of around $25.
The question remains, however, is it good or is it a joke (much like Star Trek's Romulan Ale, which is one of the worst-rated beers ever)?
We received an unsolicited test bottle in the mail. When we opened it and announced our acquisition in our best newscaster voice, something magical happened. Just like prairie dogs, heads began popping up in cubicles at our office. Ron Burgundy bears mucho power in any newsroom.
With several eager test subjects, it was time to open the bottle of Scotchy Scotch Scotch.
The color was a light amber and the aroma mildly sweet, reminiscent of apricots and Brick Tamland.
Frankly, we weren't expecting much as we sipped from Styrofoam cups (itself an homage to '70s wastefulness).
But while Ron Burgundy Scotch could be a complete joke and still sell out in the flash of an eye, it turned out to be light and amusing, with caramel and vanilla notes, much like the anchorman himself. Unfortunately, much like the KVWN Action News Team, the spirit lacks the smoke and peat that gives good Scotch depth.
Look, if you want complexity, watch Walter Cronkite and drink Macallan 25-year. But if you want a Scotch made with the tears of success and a dash of mustache hair, Ron Burgundy is your choice.
We suspect most of Ron Burgundy Great Odin's Raven will be purchased and never opened, destined to sit in an office or home bar as a collectible. That's a shame, because what's inside is perfectly passable -- especially with a splash of soda or ginger ale (something you would never do with an expensive single-malt).
In conclusion, if you want a Scotchy, Scotch, Scotch that you can take to a party, Ron Burgundy is your man and your drink. Stay classy, Miami.