Chad Pennington Will Start at QB For Miami Dolphins

First Miami Sports News was all about the Heat's Chris Bosh being traded. Then, Miami Sports News was all about the Dolphins' Chad Henne being benched in favor of Chad Pennington. You so crazy, Miami Sports News! Oh... wait... this just in.... one of these things is actually happening.

In news that can only be described as, "Holy shit bananas!" Dolphins head coach Tony Sparano announced today that quarterback Chad Henne has been benched and that Chad Pennington will start at quarterback this week.

"We have a lot of confidence in Chad Henne," Sparano told the media. "This guy has gotten a lot better. The decision is done."

A vote of confidence after being demoted? Awesome.

Some had been speculating that Henne was on a short leash, and that Pennington could be serving as a bridge between Henne and third-string quarterback Tyler Thigpen (this guy!).

The move speaks volumes about the future of the quarterback position in Miami. Namely, it's as clusterfucked as ever.

So Pennington, who led the team to an AFC East Championship season two years ago, is back at the helm while their once christened "future franchise quarterback" sits and thinks about what a bad robot he's been.

Keep in mind that Pennington's throwing shoulder is made up of exactly the same stuff they use to make Chinese fortune cookies. So it may not be long before we see the dude who took a picture of himself banging a skeleton running our offense. Fantastic!