The Most and Least Awesome Jobs in Miami, 2012

Jobs are like penises: everybody has them, except for women, who have vaginas and jobs. Then there's also hermaphrodites, who (we assume) don't hold two jobs. Or maybe some do, because it's a tough economy out there, plus they have to deal with the whole double genitals thing. The physiology of that is pretty interesting without even delving into the psychological ramifications of having -- wait, what were we talking about again? Oh, right, jobs.

Recently, we came across an article on Gawker ranting on about an article on which ranked 200 jobs from best to worst. Gawker based its article on how many shitty jokes they could string together by throwing darts at a cork board full of various adjectives and vulgarities (which is damned ridiculous amateur bullshit) whereas used a fairly sound methodology to get their point across. We decided to take a stab at this one using Miami flair. Our methodology: a Thursday morning deadline.