Let’s face it: Miami loves its booze.
Although alcohol is wonderful on its own, when coupled with Miami’s second vice — desserts — it’s a food pairing well worth the buzz. Restaurants and bakeries around the city have caught on to epic culinary mashups such as the sushi/burrito and
Never again will you have to decide between alcohol and dessert for the sake of self-control. Indulgent, spiked treats are your new best friend, offering both that boozy kick and sweets fix you crave. Like all things in life, here are ten times that alcohol makes everything better.
10. Spank the Monkey at Burger & Beer Joint
The marriage of booze and milkshakes may be a sinful one, but then again, who’s counting? Sometimes you just have to #treatyoself. Yes, adults included. So when you’re feeling naughty, go for Spank the Monkey ($10), an adult shake that fuses rocky road ice cream, fresh bananas, Pinnacle cake vodka, and DeKuyper crème de banana liqueur.
9. Beam Me Up at Azucar Ice Cream
It’s not a complete list without mentioning Azucar. Little Havana’s reigning ice-cream emporium churns out a plethora of never-fail flavors for any kind of palate — even those with an urge for alcohol. Signature Miami flavor Beam Me Up uses Jim Beam and crushed Heath bars. Rum-raisin remains a classic. And sorbet flavors like Pinot Noir, red sangria, and bellini offer a more refreshing twist to keep you and the entire
8. Homemade cinnamon Atlántico rum cake at Ortanique on the Mile
One bite of a moist rum cake can easily transport you to a palm-lined paradise with white sandy beaches and fresh blue waters. Celebrated chef and master of the Caribbean’s “Cuisine of the Sun,” Cindy Hutson knew this and decided to take the classic rum cake up a notch. Ortanique on the Mile’s version (at $8 per slice) is perfectly dense and decadent, made with cinnamon crumble, chantilly cream, rum-soaked raisins, and crushed pecans, providing an impeccable taste-texture interaction you can’t get enough of.
7. The Anchor at Wynwood Diner
Cue Kelis’ 2003 anthem, “Milkshake,” 'cause damn right Wynwood Diner’s milkshakes are better than yours. The boozy milkshakes work solo or paired with any dish you order, whether you're there for brunch, lunch, or dinner. Go with the Anchor ($10), made with Sailor Jerry rum, pineapple, and banana cream. Then make room for another. Other flavors include Beer Me, with Old Forester, Averna Amaro, Cigar City M
6. Moonshine ice cream at Serendipity Creamery
Serendipity Creamery (421 NW 26th St., Miami) was ahead of the game when the ice-cream shop began serving booze-infused flavors to its Wynwood clientele. Ice cream and alcohol were made for each other. You’ll see it in the flawless fusions of dark-chocolate whiskey, white Russian with candied hazelnuts, and the must-try moonshine-soaked apricot. Special-order popsicles are also available in refreshing flavors such as mojito, passionfruit vodka, and strawberry daiquiri.
5. Dark chocolate brownie at Edge Steak & Bar
Miami has a handful of notable steakhouses, including the Four Season’s show-stopper Edge Steak & Bar, which delights diners with its delicious cuts of meat, vibrant seafood selections, and comforting desserts. Take, for example, the dark-chocolate brownie ($9). Dense, dark, and ultra-rich — it’s exactly how we like 'em,
4. Michy’s bread pudding at Cena by Michy
Sweetbread tacos, boneless snapper, and braised short ribs, oh my. There’s much to taste at Cena by Michy. Those who make it to dessert are generously rewarded with chef Michelle Bernstein’s to-die-for bread pudding ($9) — soaked in cognac, packed with raisins and chunks of chocolate, and topped with orange rind and vanilla ice cream. With a taste as luscious as it looks, it’s nearly impossible to resist.
3. Swine sticky bun at Swine Southern Table & Bar
Many people trek to Homestead for Knaus Berry Farm’s beloved cinnamon rolls, but Swine Southern Table’s sticky bun ($12) is also worth the journey. A gooey maple-bacon bourbon glaze coats a warm cinnamon bun topped with cinnamon butter and pecan brittle and accompanied by a side of salty caramel ice cream. You won’t get tanked, but you will be satisfied.
2. Spiked milk and cookies at Meat Market
Miami Beach’s Meat Market lets grownups share in the good old-fashioned childhood duo: milk and cookies. Except this adults-only serving comes with a glass of rich and creamy aged rum, crème de cacao, and almond milk whip. What you do with it is fair game. Sip, chug, or use it as a dunk tank for the colossal cookies it comes with, including chocolate chip, double-chocolate chunk, and oatmeal.
1. Piña colada-spiked doughnut hole at the Salty Donut
Miami’s first artisanal doughnut shop gives the city a reason to wake up semi-early Friday through Sunday. Lines begin to form well before the 11 a.m. opening time at the Wynwood pop-up (29 NW 24th St., Miami), when devoted doughnut lovers wait in line for the Salty Donut’s handcrafted creations, especially its hole-in-one masterpiece: the spiked doughnut hole. Twenty-four-hour-raised brioche doughnut holes come with a plastic syringe filled with a rotating liquor. Flavors vary week to week, and the latest addition is straight-up summer in your mouth. Try the piña colada-spiked doughnut hole — which comes covered in pineapple glaze and shredded coconut and paired with a coconut rum shooter — while it lasts.
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to Miami New Times's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Miami's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
Follow Maureen on Twitter.