The corridors of William McKinley High are a long fucking way from Calle Ocho, chico.
But today, Entertainment Weekly reported that Pitbull is "being courted" by the producers of Fox's Glee to play the older brother of Santana (Naya Rivera), a newly out and proud lesbian cheerleader.
And all we've got to say is "Ugh."
Yes, Glee is America's fave television musical. Sure, it's got an entire tickle trunk packed with Emmys and Golden Globes. OK, it's a rare, hyper-popular forum for gay and lesbian issues. But it's also the TV hour where a lot of pretty cool pop culture gets turned into primetime pap.
For one, typically kickass comedian Jane Lynch sold her soul to the show, forsaking the kind of truly funny shit (Best in Show, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Talladega Nights) that made her (kinda) famous. For another, it's the place where Cee-Lo's "Forget You" went from fucking to sucking. And finally, Glee has managed to make us mute classic tracks like John Lennon's "Imagine," Ike & Tina's "River Deep, Mountain High," and Bob Marley's "One Love (People Get Ready)."
Fortunately, though, Pitbull's already a total sellout. He's been a flack for 411-Pain. He shills Dr. Pepper on la esquina. He will spend the holidays in a hotel with you for a few hundred dollars.
Still, Crossfade's gonna be bummed if Mr. Worldwide goes "gleek," dons a pink suit, and performs a musical theater remix of "Give Me Everything" alongside Glee's seriously goofy cast.
Why? Mostly because we liked the smart-ass way that he handled Lindsay Lohan's recent defamation lawsuit, inviting her (via video) to accompany him to the MTV Awards and then cleverly calling bullshit on LaLohan with a sarcastic countersuit. That shit was funny.
But really, the chances that Dat Lil Chico will turn down a fat Glee payday are pretty slim. Especially since living Latin-pop legend (and Pit's "Wepa" collaborator) Gloria Estefan has already agreed to play the lesbian cheerleader's mom.
So ... Will Mr. Worldwide play the older brother? Crossfade says, "Ugh."
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