If you're reading this, you survived Thanksgiving. Congratulations on either successfully dodging the flying stuffing tossed by you relatives arguing about impeachment or waking up from your hours-long food coma. With Turkey Day 2019 officially over, it's time to party this weekend. For Black Friday lovers, hit a unique bazaar at the Wharf Miami on Friday or take in a free performance at Microtheater Miami (we hear there may be free beer as well). On Saturday, laugh with Tom Segura as his Take It Down comedy tour hits Olympia Theater. For the late-night crowd, BlackGummy will keep it thumpin' at Treehouse Miami Saturday evening. To close out the weekend, take your pooch on a paddleboarding adventure, which takes off from Morningside Park on Sunday morning.
Here are the best things to do in Miami this weekend:
Friday, November 29
Sure, you can spend your Black Friday waging war with some rando over a blender in a box store. Or, you could support some awesome local businesses and boutiques at the Wharf's Bazaar Boutique Marketplace all day long and have a beverage while you're at it. In addition to food offerings and handmade tchotchkes galore for purchase, the Wharf will have $1 Wharf lagers and $3 wine by the glass specials from 4 to 7 p.m. Noon to 3 a.m. Friday, November 29, at the Wharf Miami, 114 SW North River Dr., Miami; wharfmiami.com. Admission is free.
If you have yet to experience the unique theatrical magic that is Microtheater Miami, Friday might be your ideal day to try it out. The experience is built from a bunch of 160-square foot shipping containers in an open lot, where you usually pay six bucks a performance to see the spectacular happenings take place inside. But on Friday, the first performance of each work (at 8 and 8:15 p.m.) is totally free for the special Microtheater Miami Black Friday event. #MicroHorrorStories is the theme, so prepare to be spooked. We're told there will be free beer as well, at least for as long as supplies last. 7:30 p.m. Friday, November 29, at Microtheater Miami, 1490 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; eventbrite.com. Admission is free.
Each month, the Museum of Contemporary Art (MOCA) North Miami gives you a reason to use those jazz hands. As part of its Jazz at MOCA series, Afro-Peruvian emerging star Kiki Sanchez will perform on Friday evening. Born in Lima, Peru and now residing in Miami, Sanchez has shared the stage with the likes of Cachao, Jim Gasior, Arturo Sandoval and many more. As a pre-show listen, give his two LPs — his 2007 debut, Dreams, and 2011's Two Worlds featuring Grammy winner Susana Baca — a spin. 8 p.m. Friday, November 29, at MOCA Plaza, 770 NE 125th St., Miami; mocanomi.org. Admission is free.
Saturday, November 30
New York City's frigid winters may have the Rockefeller Center ice skating rink and a big ole tree to heat things up. Well, here in our more humid paradise, we do things a little differently. On Saturday, there will be a Christmas Tree Lighting Ceremony at Bayfront Park to officially ring in the season. In addition to a 50-foot LED Christmas tree light show, the Bayskate roller skating rink will officially open (and stay that way through Christmas Day!). So make sure to grab your skates; If you don't own some, rentals will be available. On the grub and shopping front, a number of holiday season-appropriate vendors will have your back. 7 to 11 p.m. Saturday, November 30, at Bayfront Park, 301 Biscayne Blvd., Miami; eventbrite.com. Admission is free.
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Haven't listened to Tom Segura's Your Mom's House podcast just yet? Where the hell have you been? The hilarious, interview-filled and reflective podcast has been around since 2010, with guests spanning Bill Burr, Joe Rogan, Pauly Shore and oodles of others along the way. It is a must-listen. Segura is also renowned for his three big-time Netflix specials, including his latest, 2018's Disgraceful. On Saturday, he hits Olympia Theater for a stand-up gig as part of his Take It Down Tour. 7:30 p.m. Saturday, November 30, at Olympia Theater, 174 E. Flagler Street, Miami; olympiatheater.org. Tickets cost $35 to $75.
What's your favorite gummy? Regardless of how much you may love your favorite flavor when BlackGummy hits the stage, he always brings a flavor of his own. The California-bred DJ-producer-extraordinaire returns to Treehouse Miami on Saturday night, with an arsenal of dark techno to his name. On the new tunes front, he released a new EP last year, BlackGummy: The Remixes (Vol. 1), with remixes from the likes of Brennan Grey, Electrocado, EDDIE and more. 11 p.m. Saturday, November 30, at Treehouse Miami, 323 23rd Street, Miami Beach; eventbrite.com. Tickets are free for entry before midnight or $15 for entry after midnight.
Sunday, December 1
You know who else had to sit through your loony relatives mouthing off about politics during Thanksgiving? Your dog. Your poor dog! With the holiday in the rearview mirror, Fido really deserves to play. On Sunday morning, you can take man's best friend on a special Paddle with Your Pooch adventure, which takes off from Morningside Park. Your paid admission includes a kayak rental from the kind folks at Clear View Kayak, human life vest (if you have a puppy life vest, bring it) and one Milk-Bone treat. After an adventure to a nearby island, you and your pup will have ample space to mingle with other humans and canines, too. 10 a.m. Sunday, December 1, at Morningside Park, 750 NE 55th Terr., Miami; eventbrite.com. Tickets for one owner and one pet cost $25.
In the blink of an eye, Art Basel and Miami Art Week have already arrived. Among the multiple happenings and eye-catching works to check out, the Miami Museum of Contemporary Art of the African Diaspora (MoCAAD) and Lowe Art Museum are hosting an Art Week Kickoff Event with artist Juan Roberto Diago and a special reception. The Cuban contemporary artist will sit down for a conversation focusing on art and race in his homeland. Afterward, be among the first to check out the new "Diago: The Pasts of This Afro Cuban Present" at the Lowe. 5 to 9 p.m. Sunday, December 1, at University of Miami Lowe Art Museum, 1301 Stanford Dr., Coral Gables. Admission is free with RSVP via eventbrite.com.