Whatever’s Your Pleasure

Flowers, dinner reservations, heart-shape boxes of bonbons. Meh. Valentine’s Day has become so ho-hum. It seems like every restaurant, boutique, and nightspot in town is offering some kind of V-Day deal. Should you go to The Palm? Azul? Wish? The Miami Seaquarium? All of the above are offering pricey prix-fixe meals tonight. So here’s our gift to you: We sifted through the seemingly endless swirl of stuff to do and found a few unique happenings worth taking your pooky to tonight.

If your sweetie is a fan of smooth jazz and over-the-top art, most definitely head to the Fairchild Tropical Botanic Garden (10901 Old Cutler Rd., Coral Gables; 305-667-1651) for the annual Romance of Jazz and Modern Art. BYO picnic basket, and bring your boo-boo for live music by chanteuse Nicole Henry and the 18-piece FIU Big Band. Stroll across the lawn to check out the ongoing display of Roy Lichtenstein’s sculptures this evening at 7. Admission is $60; a candle-lit table will cost ya $125. Your lady doesn’t buy the “Every kiss begins with Kay” BS, but her urge for romance – real, soul-stirring romance – is intoxicating. Indulge her with art and poetry at the Dorsch Gallery (151 NW 24th St., Miami; 305-576-1278, www.dorschgallery.com). There’ll be complimentary champers and an interlocked reading of the poems of Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes. Wear black, bring Kleenex, and -- three days after the 45th anniversary of Plath's death -- mourn what could have been. Honestly, Valentine’s Day is just another way for The Man to worm his greedy hand into your pocket. Broke? All is not lost. If you’ve got a honey with a sense of humor (and a grip on harsh economic realities), take her to Dogma (7030 Biscayne Blvd., Miami). Who needs caviar and filet mignon when there are gourmet franks and complimentary sparkling wine to be had with your combo meal? Skip the garlic fries if you plan on tongue-wrestling later. If you’re single and frustrated, or in a relationship that leaves you with unresolved aggression, take it to the Ex-Factor Anti-Valentine’s Day boxing class at Crunch (1259 Washington Ave., Miami Beach). The throwdown is sponsored by Everlast, and you’re welcome to bring a picture of your ex to tape on a focus mitt to hone your right hook. Admission is free! Call 305-647-8222.
Thu., Feb. 14, 2008