Why don't we get drunk and screw? The folks who are organizing National Alcohol Screening Day today can give you several sobering answers to that eternal question. The day is part of Alcohol Awareness Month, a time when drinkers are asked to consider their alcoholic intake and the risks, both immediate and long-term, involved with drinking. There will be several stations set up throughout the city in which you can get the cold hard facts about drinking. The screening runs all day. For Miami locations visit www.alcoholscreeningday.com. (JCR)
Friday 4/9
Talk about having a captive audience. If comedian Jim Florentine made contact with the millions of Americans who signed onto the Do Not Call list, invited them to his gig, and even a quarter of them showed, he'd be doing really well. Problem is he can't call them! But those folks are definitely the types who'd relate to his album Jim Florentine Is Terrorizing Telemarketers, featuring mock calls that fulfill the fantasies of many. It's only fitting that Florentine lends his voice to the Comedy Central series Crank Yankers. He also appears periodically on the Howard Stern show dishing about current events. Since it's Good Friday, you might need a laugh, so see him in the flesh tonight at 8:30 or tomorrow and Sunday at various times at the Miami Improv, 3390 Mary St., Coconut Grove. Tickets range from $13 to $22. Call 305-441-8200. (NK)
Saturday 4/10
Easter is a time for bunnies and colored eggs, chocolates, and playing dress-up. Unfortunately much of the fun stuff has been co-opted by malls, where people in bunny suits inadvertently scare little children. Why not go where real bunnies dwell, where real grass grows, and real Easter eggs hide behind shrubs and fences? The Little Farm, a jovial petting zoo, is hosting its annual Easter Egg Hunt with four separate starting times, pony rides, and a chance to get real with the Easter Bunny. The first hunt starts at 9:00 a.m. at the Little Farm, 22400 SW 134th Ave. Admission is eight dollars for children and six bucks for adults. Reservations are required. Call 305-258-3186. (JCR)
Sunday 4/11
Yep, it's noon on Easter Sunday and you've already inhaled most of the contents of that enormous Easter basket you made for your kids. Treating yourself to all those treats has made your blood sugar skyrocket and now you're bouncing off the walls. In fact you're beginning to feel a bit nauseated. Maybe you should take yourself over to a church and contemplate your loathsome gluttony, not to mention this day when it is said Jesus Christ rose from the dead. Or maybe you should just go to the movies and catch the 3:00 showing of The Passion of the Christ? Once you sit through more than two hours of graphic, stomach-turning violence, you'll never eat candy again. (NK)
Monday 4/12
He was the impish songwriter who left his indelible mark on the Seventies with tunes such as "We've Only Just Begun," "Just an Old Fashioned Love Song," and "Rainy Days and Mondays," not to mention being a guest on talk shows, starring in three Smokey and the Bandit flicks, and playing a recurring role on the CBS soap The Bold and the Beautiful. She was the big-voiced belter who scored hits like "Don't Cry Out Loud," "Midnight Blue," and "You Should Hear How She Talks About You" during the same era. Neither has had a big-selling tune in years, so what better idea than to join forces and go on tour. Paul Williams and Melissa Manchester have done just that, hitting the road with a program they call Stories and Songs. Expect plenty of both when the curtain rises tonight at 7:30 at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts, 201 SW Fifth Ave., Fort Lauderdale. Tickets range from $20 to $50. Call 954-462-0222. (NK)
Tuesday 4/13
Think Finland and renowned operatic sopranos don't automatically come to mind. Maybe something more like reindeer stew. But there are some famous Finns, really! Architect Alvar Aalto, composer Jean Sibelius, gift-giving mack daddy Santa Claus, and soprano Soile Isokoski. We'd like to tell you Santa Claus is coming to town, but it is still April, so you'll just have to be satisfied with a visit by Isokoski, who will perform works by Bernstein, Strauss, Scarlatti, and even fellow countryman Sibelius with pianist Marita Viitasalo at 8:00 tonight. Presented by the Concert Association of Florida, the concert goes on at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts, 201 SW Fifth Ave., Fort Lauderdale. Tickets range from $20 to $75. Call 877-433-3200, ext 301. (NK)
Wednesday 4/14
That which we call a bowling pin by any other name would tumble as sweet. Well, maybe. At the Art Bowl Auction, a fundraising event to benefit the Children's Home Society Florida Chapter, bowling pins become works of art. Not only will they be decorated by local artists such as Romero Britto and Lebo, but the participants can create their own masterpieces from the old pins. It's all part of the annual event sponsored by the Advertising Federation of Greater Miami. Of course, if you must smash the pins, you can bowl a few games and watch them fly. The event begins at 7:00 p.m. at Don Carter's Kendall Lanes, 13600 N. Kendall Dr. Admission is $120 for a team of six players. Call 786-223-4463. (JCR)
From the early years of Bola de Nieve and Benny Moré to the reign of Queen Celia, Cuban music has been a vital expression of life with its infectious and intensive rhythm. The hybrid of African beats and Latin influences as well as the proximity of jazz and lately hip-hop keep Cuban music on the cutting edge. One of the foremost composers and musicians in the world, pianist Omar Sosa, and his septet will perform tonight with a straight-ahead jazz set that promises to be anything but predictable. He brings to the piano his formative roots as a percussionist, as well as his roots in Yoruba culture. Part of the Rhythm Foundation's Transatlantic Festival, it's a show not to be missed. Sosa takes the stage at 8:00 p.m. at the Manuel Artime Theater, 900 SW First St. Tickets cost $22. Call 305-672-5202. (JCR)
