This Week's Day by Day Picks

Thursday August 14

With more than twelve books of humorous drawings under his belt, it is obvious cartoonist Steve Gould has a lot to get off his chest. His latest collection, Less is Less, pokes a sardonic finger in the ribs of middle age; low-carb, low-fat, and low-flavor dieting; exercise, and everything that makes up the social fabric of 21st-century living. The artist will be introducing the book tonight at Books & Books (265 Aragon Ave., Coral Gables). Come prepared with a sketchpad as Gould shows everyday doodlers how to develop their habit into an art. Gould appears at 8:00. Admission is free. Call 305-442-4408.

Friday August 15

The songs from Sun-Sentinel columnist/cabaret diva Stephen Goldstein's CD Screw You and Other Satiric Serenades might give you an idea of what to expect when the musical social critic takes the stage at Cinema Paradiso (503 Sixth St., Fort Lauderdale) tonight. Ditties such as "Damn Afghanistan," "Facelift Lady, Botox Girl," "Where Are You, J. Edgar Hoover, When We Need You," and "I Don't Want to Have a Clone" promise some sidesplitting humor at the sake of our increasingly dismal socio-political quagmire. His manic persona and sharp-edged humor have drawn comparisons with the likes of piano man Mark Russell, Rex Harrison, and Noel Coward. If your growing outrage with war, Israeli-Palestinian relations, the economy, and even rumors of J.Lo and Ben Affleck breaking up are getting the best of you, Goldstein offers the following often-quoted words of wisdom: "Laughter is the best medicine." Goldstein performs at 8:00 tonight and Saturday, August 16. Tickets cost $15. Call 954-525-3456 ext. 107.

Saturday August 16

Jungle is more than a dance beat that throbs in nightclubs throughout the world -- it's a way of life. At least that's what jungle heads attest to. In fact jungle DJs such as DJ SS declare you have to feel it to understand it. SS will be in charge tonight as the jungle-head tribes gather in a mega dance party benefiting Camillus House, an agency that helps the homeless. The party, titled Exodus 2003, oozes benevolence with a nonperishable canned food drive at the door. They will also attempt to keep bitchy DJ followers from complaining too much with a lineup of more than fourteen spinmeisters, including Twisted Individual, Fierce, Apparatus, and Thirty Fingers of Funk. Because of the intense sound system, the organizers urge their peeps to take precautions and protect their hearing -- which means you should leave your negative loud-mouthed cronies at home. Doors open at 9:00 p.m. at the Polish American Club, 1250 NW 22nd Ave. Admission is $15 with two cans of food. Call 305-635-2240.

Sunday August 17

Boldly going where few mere mortals dare to venture, DJ Le Spam and New Sheriff are taking groovesters to the past. But it's not the golden oldies that you might imagine -- the dynamic duo is taking the party back in time, Jamaican style. Each month they will be spinning only predigital dancehall, rocksteady, ska, and classics from the "Rockers" era. Listen for tunes from the Sixties to the Eighties from the likes of Super Cat, the Jammys, Junjo Lawes, and the Radics. Don't know what the heck we're talking about? Check out the party for yourself. Just remember, with Jamaica, there really is no problem. You will rub-a-dub and boogy down. The classic Jamaican Jam begins at 9:00 p.m. at I/O, 30 NE 14th St. Admission is five dollars. Call 305-358-8007.

Monday August 18

With summertime wearing down the city's social beat to a slow simmer, events in August are best attended in casual-sexy, pseudo Boho threads. Red wine is so out -- be sure to order a nice refreshing pinot grigio. You'll need this advice if you want to score points with the hip sophisticates of the Artcrowd, officially known as the Bass Museum's "young affiliate group." Between the lines, this might be the event for the grown-up hookup. The gang will be hanging out tonight at the art studios of sculptors Federico Uribe and Carolina Sardi. After an hour or so of chitchat focused on a third party (namely the art), you can get to know one another better over dinner at one of Miami's funkiest faux-Boho-glam joints, the restaurant One Ninety. Put on those skinny jeans and billowing gauzy white shirt and dare to be daring. The party meets at 6:30 at the studios, 250 NE 60th St. It then moves to One Ninety, 190 NE 46th St. Admission costs $39 with dinner. Call 305-673-7530 ext. 1013.

Tuesday August 19

The best flamenco dancers know they must lift their bodies up, forever moving like a Goya painting toward the heavens. Still they know they are earthbound and must trample with grace while holding their breasts out like the tips of a bull's horns. Flamenco is dusty, florid, bloody, and passionate. For dancers who aspire to master the Andalusian dance and flirt with duende, a New York-based flamenco master teacher, Nelida Tirado, leads a series of workshops over the next five days. Brought to Miami by the dance group Bailes Ferrer, Tirado promises to enlighten, inspire, and raise her posse up. Flamenco Under the Sun 2003 runs through Sunday, August 24, at Teatro Abanico, 22 Giralda Ave., Coral Gables. Registration costs $150 for six days or $30 per session. Call 954-475-2298.

Wednesday August 20

There is no end to the things men can say about women or women can say about men. Are we from Mars? How did our potty training influence our social graces? How do hormone fluctuations make a sexy little nymph turn into a completely whacked-out, obsessive monster? It's all been written about and talked about in a plethora of post-Oprah television shows. Not to be outdone, Jane Atchison-Nevel, FIU professor of religious studies, will take her turn at the soapbox when MiamIntelligence features her as guest speaker. The hyphenated Ph.D. will be leading a visual lecture titled The Goddess of India, in which she will chart the path of goddesses of all stripes, no doubt arguing that every woman deserves her rightful throne. We worship, already, we worship. The lecture begins at 7:00 p.m. at the Miami Museum of Science and Space Transit Planetarium, 3280 S. Miami Ave. Admission is ten dollars. Call 305-773-8408.

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Juan Carlos Rodriguez