Pepe Billete's Open Letter to Lil Wayne

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Bandz a make ya dance.

The sad part is that you're so out of touch with reality you think you look like a "skater," but what you don't realize is that you actually look like una negra marimacha playing bench in the WNBA.

And you call yourself the modern-day Tupac? Sorry, papo, you're more like a modern-day minstrel show, a disgrace to your own people.

Bandz a make ya dance.

So here you are now with your shit-talking and lies about the Heat getting you banned from the NBA just so you can make a few headlines on our backs? Really, bitch? You must have seriously lost your fucking mind. This is Miami, baby. Don't let the sun and the cocaine fool you. Aquí hay hombre, pingu y macho no maricones como tu. And don't let the term fool you, pipo -- un maricón has nothing to do with being gay; I wouldn't dare insult the gay community by associating them with the likes of you. No, un maricón is an ostentatious little bitch who has to constantly draw attention to himself because he has no substance or charisma otherwise. You, sir, are the epitome of that definition.

Bandz a make ya dance.

Sure, you can say you'll come back to Miami and no one will care about your statements, but that shit is only going to fly on South Beach, pipo. I dare you to bring that shit over the bridge. Actually, I think you already know that, because you decided to humiliate the most gentle and mild-mannered member of the team, El Bosh. That's because you know if you would have said some fuck shit like that about el primo mio Udonis, you would have had all of Overtown and a Cuban puppet up your ass. Let's get something straight, "Little" man: You may have all the money in the world, but the only thing that shit will ever buy you is the respect of broke bitches and whores like you. All of that billete will never earn you the respect of un pingu, and it just so happens Miami is a city known for its pingus. So your best bet is to get the fuck out of here before shit gets too hot for you.

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Miami New Times staff