For those of us who call the fashion industry home, there's a great deal of things that get our panties in a bunch. Like, we really hate it when people refer to us as "fashionistas" -- it's the equivalent of "foodie" for the culinary world. Enough already.
Or, when people pronounce the word haute couture like "hot" couture. Hot couture is a collection of three-inch thick wool coats, lined with chinchilla fur. Haute couture (pronounce like oat) is hand-made, high-end fashion that only about 200 people in the world can afford and is embraced by fashion houses like Chanel, Armani Prive, and Givenchy. Come on, guys. You're better than that.
But perhaps our biggest pet peeve, above mispronunciations and oversaturated labels, is Mother Nature's most malicious offspring: rain.
Rain is the root of all fashion evil. The first drop of precipitation ruins your once silky, resilient hair. And have you ever worn jeans after being drenched in a tropical storm? Can we say chafing much?
But Miami "stylistas" are sadly far too familiar with the rain. Especially those at the Mondrian South Beach last weekend, when it pissed down hard just in time for the Mondrian Market.
The monthly event promotes local boutiques and homegrown brands, and Sunday's follow-up to its May launch should've been a successful soiree. But what shoppers at the mini-marketplace experienced instead was a rude wave of downpour.
"We all originally started out outside," Sofia Salver told us about the buzzkill weather pattern while she was helping her sister, Tobi Salver, owner of Midtown's Fox House, man her booth that day. "Half the people left within the last half an hour; there's still people trickling in. Last month was a lot better."
Yet despite the bleak weather and sopping puddles spanning the Mondrian's poolside, optimism pervaded the scene.
Pop-up shops from retail contenders like La Belle Rebelle stood their ground firmly against the treacherous rain. This season, the retro-inspired brand played up lively colors painted on high-waisted swimsuits in illustrated floral prints. The collection, hinting at a modest sexiness, also presented a wide-range of bra-tops, outlined in all the right places with tulle and lace.
Fox House also guest-starred at the event, offering up the very best in boho accouterments. One shirt that stopped everyone in their tracks was by the brand The Laundry Room that read, "Go Fuck Your #Selfie" -- a bold statement piece indeed, here in the Kingdom of Most Selfies Taken.
Other boutiques just wanted to promote a natural, active lifestyle while looking exceptionally trendy all at the same time. Cue Ilo: a line of active wear eschewing the stereotypical concept of mundane, black sports-bras and camel-toe lovin' spandex for neon-hued crop tops and comic-illustrated leggings.
And though the West Coast has some nerve to so rudely hog up most of the gnarly barrels and epic waves, F1rst Surf Shop thinks surf culture is still just as important on this side of the states. Beach towels, boardshorts, and skate backpacks were perched right in front of DJ Blue Logan's booth in loud colors, while even louder, soft-tempo music beamed through the outside speakers. All that was missing was the presence of a longboard to top off the trifecta of surf essentials.
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So yes, it did come down like cats and dogs with a mean case of rabies. But that didn't tarnish the spirits of the participating retailers who so valiantly stood against the perfect storm plowing through West Avenue and the rest of Miami.
We can't, however, say the same for our coiffs. #Frizzballs.
To find out more about the next Mondrian Market, visit the Mondrian on Facebook.