Miami Beach Ranks Among the Trashiest Spring Break Destinations in the Country

The accolades just keep on coming, Miami. In an announcement that surprised no one, COED Magazine released its top 10 list of the trashiest spring break destinations in the U.S.A. -- and our very own Miami Beach ranks #6.

The magazine, which is also known for its daily snapshots of women in bikinis and lingerie, knows a thing or two about class -- who has it, and who doesn't. And Miami Beach, it declares, falls into the latter category.

"The more you think about it, the more it makes sense," explains the author of the story, known only as "Ned." "Why? The Jersey Shore went here."

Ned also argues that clubs like Space, Nikki Beach, and Mansion are trashy for "[hitting] your wallet hard" and "over-charging for drinks." Then, inexplicably, Ned hates on Miami for its inconvenient public transportation, and mentions that he'll be in town for Winter Music Conference this year.

It's not that we disagree with you, Ned. We just wish you'd made some better arguments. Instead of WMC, why don't you come visit us during Memorial Day? We'd love to hear what you have to say about Miami Beach then.

See the full list here.

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Ciara LaVelle is New Times' former arts and culture editor. She earned her BS in journalism at Boston University and moved to Florida in 2004. She joined New Times' staff in 2011.
Contact: Ciara LaVelle