Make Like Mozart

Just how gangster was Joannes Chrysostomus Wolfgangus Theophilus Mozart? He composed his first piece of music at 4 years old. At 14, he stole a sacred piece of music from the Vatican by writing it down from memory after hearing it just once. He told off archbishops to their faces back when the Catholic Church could still kill you in broad daylight and call it the work of God, and he wrote more than 600 compositions without ever achieving financial stability, partly because the dude went through new clothes like Kanye and did the 18th-century equivalent of chasing dinner at Prime 112 with bottles of Cristal at Louis every night.

His opera The Marriage of Figaro, playing tonight at the Arsht Center (1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami), was not only one of his most popular works but also among the sexiest. Everyone is doing everyone else behind their backs and making fools of themselves in the most hilarious and harmonious ways possible. The show begins at 8 p.m., so there’s plenty of time afterward to go make a fool of yourself on South Beach.
Tue., March 31, 8 p.m., 2009
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P. Scott Cunningham