| Comedy |

Magic City Episode Three: Cruller? I Hardly Know Her!

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If we had to summarize the theme of this week's episode of

Magic City, it might be "the baggage of our past often impedes our ability to

live in the present." Or "even if the State Senator claims to be into European

girls, give him a few Scotches and he'll be all over Miss Venezuela." Either way.

The Miss 1959 pageant that Ike fought

so hard for last week is in full swing at the Miramar Hotel, and maybe everyone

could enjoy it if former paramours would stop screwing everything up and/or

people involved in missing persons cases stopped winding up dead.

But hey, that's

Miami Beach for you.

Ike, as usual, is spinning multiple plates. First, he's

trying to convince a state senator to support a gambling referendum, but the

supposedly moral politician will have nothing of it. He prods Ike, telling him

that "you people are always after more money," and we don't need a master class

in anti-Semitism to tell us that "you people" isn't referring to Ike being a

hotel mogul. It's referring to Ike being a Jew. To compound matters for Ike,

Vera calls him in hysterics. Someone cancelled lunch!

Getting ditched at mealtime may not seem that terrible in

comparison to, oh, your husband being presumably dead or trying to get your

family out of Cuba or your lover's husband being a psychopath or literally

every problem of every other character on this show. But kudos for developing Vera's

character, which in the first two episodes had merely been "new wife who takes

a surprisingly long time to read the book Exodus." (It's not the hardest book

to grasp. Spoiler: The Jews go on an exodus). But turns out an old flame of

Vera's is directing the pageant for NBC. Sounds like an excellent networking


Speaking of networking, the older blonde lady Ike was

chatting up last week is his dead wife's sister, and Ike wants to discuss business. But when they get together, you get the vibe it ought to be pleasure. Sexual pleasure. Ike wants

her to buy out the Butcher's hotel shares. Good for Ike! Muscling out the dude

who's a bit trigger happy certainly won't have any negative ramifications and

we're sure becoming business partners with a woman your wife clearly finds threatening will be healthy for your marriage.

In this week's scenes with the Butcher, he hints to his wife that he knows

she's screwing around on him. He also implies that he will drown her if she

continues. Hey, we don't remember that being one of Think Like A Man's tips for

a healthier relationship. The wife is so shaken up at this threat that she

immediately goes and sleeps with Stevie, who has to go talk to the Butcher at

his poker game, which is awkward. At the very least the butcher could have

asked him to play a hand.

After a long evening on the dance floor Vera's old partner

tries to get her to come with him to New York, where he would cast her in a new

show on NBC. You can tell that this is a period piece, because the characters

treat getting to be on NBC as something respectable. Nowadays, the dude would

probably offer her the chance to be on a reality show with LMFAO. Vera

declines, sacrificing her dreams to stay with Ike. Oh, also Ike's father goes

to the hospital after fainting but it's no big deal because it's never

mentioned again. Where's Ike's daughter, too? Did she get to go on vacation

after her Bat Mitzvah? We're pulling for Disneyland.

If all this seems like a lot to handle for Ike, don't worry,

everything is going great with the missing person's investigation. Except that

a dead body just floated to the surface of the water. And the guy's wife wants

a job at the Miramar. And the gay kid who's supposed to testify decides to kill

himself as opposed to talking to the jury or getting outed. But hey, the beauty

pageant goes great and one lucky girl will have her dreams come true!

Also Ike

eats a pastry! What's significant about the pastry? Is it sweet on the outside

but surprisingly tart on the inside, thus serving as a metaphor for the hotel

and the city at large? Hopefully, this will be answered next week, right after we

learn all about Ike's daughter's vacation.

Follow Cultist on Facebook and Twitter @CultistMiami.

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