Lea and Roy Black Host Charity Gala with Dionne Warwick and Pharrell Williams

Have you ever dreamed of popping your junk to live performances by Dionne Warwick, Pharrell Williams, and Pittbull's "Gasolina"? All while wearing seven different layers of clothing including a pair of Tinkerbell wings you've awkwardly wrapped around your chest in an artsy-attempt at makeshift shall?

And have you ever dreamed of doing all this while participating in a silent auction, drinking cocktails courtesy of Grey Goose, eating a gourmet meal prepared by Chef Thorsten Leighty, and rubbing elbows with the likes of the Real Housewives of Miami, an un-muted Elaine Lancaster, and Lea Black's BFF Rick Ross?

Really? You too?! Great! You got 10 grand to spare? We have an event for you.

Don't have that kind of green? You're telling me that you lost all your money calling the Psychic Friends Network

who never once predicted an economic crash that would lead to you

getting laid off and losing your home? Well, it's time for you to learn

some really unsexy stripper moves and get engaged to a rich French dude

you have luike warm romantic feelings for, because The Black's Annual

Gala Benefit is coming to the Eden Rock Hotel this Saturday.

And if Christy Rice has taught us anything, you really need to cough up

$10,000 if you want to waltz around this event looking a high-priced

call girl. That's because 100% of all ticket and silent auction proceeds

go to the Consequences Charity and Foundation, which raises funds for

education versus incarceration for over 7,500 at-risk youth.

"This is our 17th year doing our charity gala and raising money to give

kids who are acting out opportunities for education, vocational

training and exposure to the arts, in lieu of incarceration. Our work

with the Juvenile Services Department of Miami-Dade is unprecedented in

its ability to help these children envision a future beyond their

current circumstances," says founder and Real Housewife of Miami Lea Black.

Wow! We're impressed! Not once in that statement did she mention that the only time you don't

have problems is when your dead or how she's now Madonna! And it seems

her fancy attorney husband makes sense too, look:

"It costs less to educate a child than to incarcerate one," says renowned attorney Roy Black. "And this is an event that brings our community together with celebrities, sports stars and a very good cause - it's great fun and not your typical black tie gala."

Just keep in mind, that if you hit this red carpet at this

extraordinary celebrity gala empty handed, Bravo! just might cast you a in

reality show and center the entire season around the fact that you never

paid. And really, who wants to watch that?

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Elyse Wanshel
Contact: Elyse Wanshel