Film & TV

Kim Kardashian's Baby Is Already Too Fabulous For This World

Look, it's not like Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's plans to spoil their child are surprising. They're rich. They're going to be parents. Creating entitled offspring is what rich parents do.

But if you think you know the level of opulence that's waiting for the Kimyetus on the other side of Kim's million-dollar uterus, stop. Because you don't. Unless your vision includes a 14 carat white gold diamond-encrusted pacifier, you really, really don't.

See also:

- Kim Kardashian is Pregnant With Kanye West's Baby (Video)

- Is Kim Kardashian's Pregnancy a Hollywood Conspiracy? These Twitter Users Think So

- Goodbye, Kim and Kourtney! The Ten Greatest Miami Kardashian Moments of 2012

That blinged-out pacifier, worth roughly a bajillion silver spoons, is just one of the completely ridiculous things the couple is planning to give Mini-Kardash when he or she finally makes it out of the womb, according to the Irish Independent. Naturally, it's the same make and model of the suck-toy used by Beyonce and Jay-Z's daughter, Blue Ivy.

Baby Kimye, literally sucking on diamonds from birth.

And that's just the beginning. Here are a few other playthings the newborn will be rockin' in the outside world:

  • a lunar star show on the ceiling above the crib
  • 3-D imaging on the walls
  • a stroller with an inbuilt sound system

In total, Kimye's planning to drop $100,000 on the nursery alone. An Independent source says it's all because Kardashian is imitating British royal Kate Middleton, who's also pregnant and due roughly around the same time. The reality tv star reportedly considers her own family to be America's version of royalty, which is both horrifying and disturbingly accurate.

Something tells us the Queen isn't having any diamond-crusted pacifiers around her great-grandbaby, though.

Follow Ciara LaVelle on Twitter @ciaralavelle.

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Ciara LaVelle is New Times' former arts and culture editor. She earned her BS in journalism at Boston University and moved to Florida in 2004. She joined New Times' staff in 2011.
Contact: Ciara LaVelle