Johnny Trabs Kicks Off Night at the Museum with the Have-Nots

​Have you not heard of the Have-Nots? They produce comedy with a purpose, according to their mission. Miami comedians have joined forces to form a tribe of talent, putting on shows of the highest quality.

They've asked Johnny Trabs -- extremely funny guy, CBS Miami's "Best Comic in Miami 2010," SunPost Weekly's "Readers' Choice Best Local Comic 2012," and one half of A Pair of Nuts -- to kick off a Have-Nots series at the Miami Science Museum Theater. Trabs will headline this week; after that, Comedy Night at the Museum will bring in big ol' attention-grabbing names and genuinely funny comics to perform each month.

The event will also garner the museum some well-deserved attention.

Trabs remembers going to the museum as a kid and hitting up the

laser light shows in high school. "I have a lot of weird memories of the

planetarium and Museum of Science," he says. It's only fitting, then, that this

man will bring more weirdness to this place.

Remember writer and comedian Jessica Gross, who graced Cultist with her video interview series, That's Disgusting? In his episode, Trabs was intent on turning the tables on Gross -- the only subject in the series to do so. Her goal was to make the interviewees nauseous. "I wanted to gross her out more than she grossed me out," he remembers.

It's possible he achieved his goal. "I'm a crazy guy. A lot of things really don't gross me out. I was more hot and sweaty in there," he says, referring to the bathroom stall in which the interview took place. With his pants at his ankles, he was actually trying to take a dump on camera. Lucky for Gross, he got stage fright. But he did learn something from the interview: "I don't think I could do that and talk at the same time."

Trabs believes his comedy is accessible. "What I talk about in my comedy is me and my family. I talk a lot about my wife and kids, I have two daughters. I pretty much rag on them the whole time. And myself." He finds the humor in getting a dog for the first time, how difficult marriage is, and his neighborhood, Little Havana, a place that gives every Miamian a thrill. "Even though I'm a chubby guy, I bring the high energy to the stage," Trabs says. He moves around a lot and acts out bits. "I don't just stand there for an hour."

It's not all funny business though. With A Pair of Nuts, he's toured to 15 army bases this fall. Next week, they'll be at Fort Gordon army base to perform for the troops. "To me, I think that they're the best audiences, because they need it so much and they give us the fullest attention." One guy, he remembers, hadn't seen his family in two years, and he told Trabs that his comedy offered him a break from his grief. "It's an amazing experience."

Catch Johnny Trabs being funny at the Have-Nots first Comedy Night at the Museum on Jan. 14 at 8 p.m. at Miami Science Museum Theatre (3280 South Miami Avenue, Miami). Contact (305) 646-4200.

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Liz Tracy has written for publications such as the New York Times, the Atlantic, Refinery29, W, Glamour, and, of course, Miami New Times. She was New Times Broward-Palm Beach's music editor for three years. Now she plays one mean monster with her 2-year-old son and obsessively watches British mysteries.
Contact: Liz Tracy