Former Marlins Owner John Henry Is a Raging Egomaniac; Just Look at His Wedding Favors

Marlins fans: You might want to grab a barf bag before you read this one.Remember John Henry? The guy with the pretentious eyeglasses who bought the Marlins from Wayne Huizenga in 1999 and then waffled around for three mediocre seasons before selling out and heading to Boston? Well, the 59-year-old...

By Tim Elfrink

July 1, 2009

[
        {
          "name": "Air - MediumRectangle - Inline Content - Mobile Display Size",
          "component": "19274298",
          "insertPoint": "2",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
        },{
          "name": "Editor Picks",
          "component": "17482312",
          "insertPoint": "4",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "1"
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "18711090",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Air - MediumRectangle - Combo - Inline Content",
          "component": "17482310",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "18711090",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Air - Leaderboard Tower - Combo - Inline Content",
          "component": "17482313",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        }
      ]

Marlins fans: You might want to grab a barf bag before you read this one.

Remember John Henry? The guy with the pretentious eyeglasses who bought the Marlins from Wayne Huizenga in 1999 and then waffled around for three mediocre seasons before selling out and heading to Boston?

Well, the 59-year-old rich guy got married yesterday to a pretty lady half his age. The guest list included average joes such as Larry David, Theo Epstein, and Adam Dershowitz. The wedding band was Maroon 5.

And the wedding favors? How about Bobblehead dolls of Henry and his creepily younger wife? Because Henry's 450 closest friends and family really want a grinning, nodding, giant-headed version of him and his trophy wife on their mantle.

Oh, what's that? The Boston Herald reports "many, many of the parting gifts... were left behind"? Hmmm, can't imagine why...

Become A Member

BEFORE YOU GO...
Can you help us continue to share our stories? Since the beginning, Miami New Times has been defined as the free, independent voice of Miami — and we'd like to keep it that way. Our members allow us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls.

Tim Elfrink is a former investigative reporter and managing editor for Miami New Times. He has won the George Polk Award and was a finalist for the Goldsmith Prize for Investigative Reporting.

Contact: Tim Elfrink

Follow:

Twitter: @timelfrinkmia