The 135th Annual Westminster Kennel Club All Breed Dog Show is being held today, and in case you've been living under a rock or never bothered to watch any of Christopher Guest's mockumentaries, it's a two-day, all-breed poochpoloza held at Madison Square Garden, showing off the best in each breed.

Sure, there's nothing more entertaining than watching purse accessories prance around on their tiny little legs. And yes, we are super curious about what exactly a Redbone Coonhound is. Still, perfection is boring. So in honor of the Westminster Kennel Club, here are ten busted dogs so grotesque, they're practically cute.

1. We call him: Beavis

2. We call her: Donkey Tongue

3. We call him: Combo Platter #4 (with a side of fried rice)

4. Wall call him: Dirty Sanchez

5. We call her: Aubrey O'Day Reject #376

6. We call him: Harry

7. We call her: Princess Pinata

7. Oh, and we found this princess a prince, meet Prince Guapo!

8. We call him: Red

9. We can these two: Mary Kate and Ashley

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