The stars of The Real Housewives of Miami can be entertaining, sure -- if you're into drag queen drama, blowjob controversies, terrifying plastic surgery, and throwing people into pools. But let's be real about these "Real" Housewives. They're wacky and tacky enough for Bravo franchises based in cities like New York or Atlanta. But here in Miami, our nation's capital of bizarre people and faaahbulous lifestyles, these 'wives rank at about a two on the WTF scale.
So while we'll still be tuning in this Monday for the season three premiere of The Real Housewives of Miami, we've gotta admit that Bravo could've done better. Here are five local ladies who could easily replace Lisa, Lea, Adriana, Alexia, and Joanna.
But not Elsa. Never Mama Elsa.