Are you a dude with moves that rival Magic Mike's? If you've always thought your bod was Swinging Richards-worthy (but you were a little too skittish to bare it all below the waist), this might be your lucky day.
Today only, Chippendale's, "the world's #1 male revue," is hosting an open casting call at Mansion Miami. Show up 2 p.m. and you could be looking at a future full of hysterical females, banana hammocks, and sweat-soaked dollar bills.
Basically, they're looking for hot bods, and what better place to scout than the skin-showing capital of the world, Miami? According to the casting call, they're seeking "athletically fit males possessing the charisma and good looks to shine on the big stage."
Specifically, "a Chippendales dancer needs to have the complete package," says Kevin Denberg, Managing Partner. "Qualities include stage presence, personality, charisma, charm and overall star quality. They should get an adrenaline rush from being in front of a room full of women and emulate that energy on stage. Although they are the center of attention, they need to know how to treat women in a way to make them feel special and sexy. That is really what the job is about. Our fans and customers come from around the world to feel that and experience the night of their life - each guest should feel like they are the only person in the room."
The ability to learn choreography is a must, they say. Athletes, actors and models are encouraged to show up in droves. And skills like acrobatics, singing, break dancing and playing musical instruments earn bonus points.
Additionally, the most polished dude isn't always the winner, Denberg says.
"Some guys have come to castings out of shape, timid, looking rough around the edges, etc. But if our panel of judges/women see something, then we give them a shot. We put them through a few weeks of dance training, have them hit the gym, give them a tan, get styled, etc, and in a month, there is a complete transformation. The only thing you can't 'mold' is confidence; this comes with comfort on stage and time."
The show's #1 goal, their website states, is to pleasure women. Hear that, boys? As Denberg adds, a Chippendales man is "a man who comes into work each night with a positive attitude thinking only about one thing...how am I going to ensure that every woman in the crowd has the time of her life tonight."
Chippendales performer Jaymes Vaughan will be hosting the casting call, as well as offering his own personal wisdom and inspiration to the Miami hopefuls. Local media and radio personalities will be on hand for judging purposes ... so they say.
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And, if you need a little inspiration, you can always take a cue from Chris Farley.
Hopefuls should email sexy pics to email@example.com ... oh wait, I meant firstname.lastname@example.org. Or call 305-432-9293 for more info. Otherwise, just show up this afternoon in your sexy best. And leave the shyness at home.