Next week,New Times
' annual Best of Miami issue hits the stands with more than 300 picks for the best food, drinks, clubs, people and places in town. You'll find the issue on the stands next Thursday and on the web next Tuesday. But we're giving you an early sneak peek of this year's picks every day until the issue drops.
Today, we're announcing our pick for Miami's best reality star.
Best Reality Star: Elsa Patton, Real Housewives of Miami
Some celebrities achieve fame through talent. Others get famous using their looks. In some cases, mostly in the realm of reality TV, a proclivity for hair-pulling and face-slapping will secure your place in Hollywood infamy.
The Real Housewives of Miami's Elsa Patton has done none of those things.
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Instead, she's won the hearts of Bravo-watching America using the tools at her disposal: botched facial plastic surgery, an endless supply of white wine, and the sassy attitude that comes from being a Cuban woman of a certain age who thinks she's a bit psychic.
Into the world of artificial luxury portrayed on The Real Housewives of Miami, Patton injects the bizarre reality of the Magic City. She's had a bad nip/tuck; plenty of Miami women can relate. She believes she's a seer; that's some spooky voodoo shit right there. She's even launched her own Cuban coffee truck. Could she be any more Miami?
That's the unlikely magic of Elsa Patton: Her face may be plastic, but when it comes to representing Miami, she's as real as it gets. On reality TV, anyway.