February 1, 2011 | 2:32pm
Don't be a snob about renting a keg. No one's going to think you're Van Wilder's older, uglier brother. You're just thrifty. Providing libation for your closest 40 alcoholic buds during the Super Bowl can get pricey. In a crappy economy, the smartest way to go is with the money-saver. And prices vary widely, so read this post closely.
We're offering a few suggestions on where to get a decent keg 'a beer in the 305 for game day, or any day, for that matter. (Historical fact: inventor Richard Spikes gave birth to the keg tap in 1910. Thanks, bro.)
Tio's liquor isn't just that booze you stole from your uncle to intoxicate your high school dates. Tio's is one of the best places to get a keg in Miami. The store offers both large and small, and boasts a significant list of imported and domestic beers, including Hoegaarden, Ward Dunkel, Sierra Nevada, and Blue Moon. This is probably the most affordable keg spot around the South Miami area.
Keg of Bud: $79.99
Pump and tub rental: $15
Party Kegs will bring the party (or the keg, which is the pumping heart of the party) to your front door. Party Kegs has a strong selection of imported and domestic beers, including Dos Equis, Grolsch, and, to make you barf, Guinness. Who could possibly drink a whole keg of Guinness without a shot of a Jameson and Bailey's mix dropped in most glasses? Party Kegs will order whatever you're craving, but special orders aren't cheap. There's a $40-50 delivery fee. Worth it if you're weak or busy.
Keg of Bud: $82.99
Pump and tub rental: $13
Mister Beer Express' moto is "Don't risk a DUI, Let us do the driving for you." OK. Thanks! These guys will not only deliver domestic and imported beers like La Tropical, Moosehead, Boddingtons, and even Mike's Hard Lemonade, but also 12 packs! No lie. You're in bed and you just need a Newcastle, call these guys. The kegs even come with free cups and pickup and delivery are free.
Keg of Bud: $125.99
Total Wine has both full kegs and half kegs, and will order anything your heart desires. The store has a wide selection of beers, but they're annoyingly not listed online. If you're located up north, Total Wine is probably the best deal with the cheapest deposit for both tap and keg of any of these guys.
Keg of Bud: $79.99
Rental of tap: $2
Head to Coconut Grove Big Daddy's if you want some perfectly delicious ribs at Flanigan's while you snag a keg. Though the ribs are worth the drive, Big Daddy's is not cheap and the selection is limited to Budweiser, Bud Light, Miller Light, Heineken, and Amstel Light. You get seven days to bring it back and if you live in the Grove, why not? Spend more time partying than worrying.
Keg of Bud: $94.99
Happy Super Bowling!