Santa Claus is due for his yearly breaking and entering campaign, and you're worried that you're not going to be able to find the perfect present for the female foodie in your life.
Let Short Order do the shopping for you. We've come up with a list of items that are perfect for your favorite food-obsessed person. Whether she's a devoted culinary whiz or just likes to drink, we've got the bases covered. Go forth and shop.
If she thinks dinner isn't dinner without a pound of butter, damn the cholesterol. If her favorite foods include chicken fried steak, chicken fried chicken, and ham, you'll want to pick up a copy of Paula Deen's Southern Cooking Bible -- signed by the lady herself! This autographed book features 400 pages of recipes filled with butter, butter, and more butter. $29.95 at The Paula Deen store (butter sold separately).
If she's the type who goes nowhere without her little mini-me, then the Biltmore Hotel's Culinary Academy Cooking Buddies class is a perfect gift. This class features a mother-and-child cooking experience. Best part? They'll enjoy a three course meal apres-class. $85 includes both mom and child.
The Snarky Girl
She's read every word Bourdain ever wrote and eats life like it were a big plate of bacon. This girl laughs at the world, not with it. Give her a reminder that life is fun, damn it, with this daily affirmation by Anthony Bourdain in the form of a fridge magnet. $4 from Etsy.
She likes to give parties with style. Her apartment is constantly filled with friends, and the bar is always open. Get her a set of these Oliver martini glasses. The stemless glasses feature stick figure oliver with an olive, cherry, and lemon. Two of each to make a set of six. $23.70 at CB2.
Bad breakup in 2011? Don't get mad, get revenge with the Ex knife set. Five chef-grade knives are magnetically embedded into the head, legs, torso and crotch (ouch) of the pool little guy who f**ked with this kitchen diva for the last time. It also serves as a subtle little warning for the next man that this gal means business. $79.95 at Amazon.com.
The Animal Lover
If she cooks for her dogs more than for you, then these silicon oven mitts in the shape of a monkey make a great gift. They're both practical and whimsical, and proceeds benefit the Animal Rescue Site. In fact, one monkey mitt provides 14 bowls of food for a shelter dog. $5 at theanimalrescuesite.com
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The Real Housewife
If she's addicted to those freaky shows where women rip each others weaves out for no reason, she'll love a bottle of RHONY's Ramona Singer's Pinot Grigio. The wine has "expressive citrus aromas with hints of mineralilty
on the nose. On the palate you get fresh, clean white fruits and crisp
acidity, with a kiss of lemon on the well-balanced finish." Perfect to guzzle while she's camped out in front of the television watching the Bravo bitchfests. $13.99 at The Wine Buyer.