Halloween is here. You've probably got your costume hanging in the closet for tonight and the candy ready for those trick or treaters.
But, if you're like us, the pumpkin sits at the doorstep untouched.
Pumpkin carving can be intimidating. Sure there are kits at the store but the last time we tried to make a simple devil face, it turned out looking more like Ernest Borgnine than the prince of darkness. Not cool.
You need a pumpkin that scares the clown pants off these little beggars who show up at your door. If they're going to get free candy -- make them work for it.
That means you've got to really delve deep inside your psyche and pull out your worst nightmares. To get you started, we've found some of the most fiendish pumpkins as wicked inspiration.
Each pumpkin is freakishly evil-- and takes about eight hours to create. That means if you call in sick from work and start now you can complete your project by sundown. Now that's a scary thought.
5. Cannibal Pumpkin
We bring them into our house each year, not realizing that if a pumpkin can turn on its own kind what form of torture and mayhem is it plotting for your family? By the way -- has anyone seen the chihuahua lately?
4. Cheshire Cat
While Alice in Wonderland may be some beloved children's classic to some, we always got nightmares from that damn story. There's an evil queen, a rabbit on speed, a bi-polar mad hatter, and that grinning cat. Never trust a smiling cat -- look what happened to that poor canary.
The Predator is the baddest monster/alien out there. He hunts humans, can make himself invisible -- plus the Muther has dreadlocks! Scarier than teen vampires and werewolves any day.
It could be the upcoming 2012 Mayan mind-f**k, it could be that zombie movies are cheap and easy to film (throw synthetic blood on a bunch of extras and call it a day), but the walking dead have already invaded the planet. Even though they're easy to kill, it's still pretty creepy when your dead aunt Yetta shows up at your door looking for a bite to eat -- and she's not satisfied with a nice whitefish and bagel spread anymore.
A psychotic killer mixed with a drag queen. He's all our evil clown fantasies times ten -- a mass murderer with a thing for makeup and a vendetta against a super hero. A bat-shit crazy human trumps a pack of zombies any day.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
Watch a time-lapse video, courtesy of Yahoo, showing sculptor Andy Begholz turn a pumpkin into the Joker. The actual carving took eight hours -- you can see the entire process in two minutes.