1. When you see duck l'orange on the menu, you think about what a neat ice cream flavor it would make.
2. You do your grocery shopping at the freeze-dried foods aisle in Target's camping department.
3. The meal you served your cat Missy last night: 9 Lives Tuna & Egg Foam with Kit'n'Kaboodle Dust.
4. What about that time you secretly hooked your grandfather's defibrillator to a slab of calves liver just to see if it had any effect on the taste notes?
5. You get an inordinate amount of enjoyment from using a syringe, PVC tubes, and agar agar to create spaghetti made from jellifed Fruit Loops.
6. The toast you delivered at your sister's wedding consisted of only a single Nicholas Kurti quote: "I think it is a sad reflection on our civilization that while we can and do measure the temperature in the atmosphere of Venus, we do not know what goes on inside our soufflés." Plus you know who Nicholas Kurti is.
7. You are thoroughly convinced that mushroom consommé is best served from an eye-dropper.
8. Seeing a dog foam at the mouth whets your appetite.
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9. You filed a patent application for the "inverse root beer float" -- a scoop of root beer sorbet in a tall glass of heavy cream.
10. Isn't that a Wylie Dufresne T-shirt you're wearing?