This is not a test. Hide your family. Sell all of your belongings for canned food and weaponry. Prepare yourself for utmost destruction. The year's first tropical disturbance is churning just off the coast of Florida, and the time has come to PANIC! Wait, what's that? It's basically just a big rain ... More >>
Compared to the miles-wide F5 monsters that roar across the Kansas and Nebraska plains, Florida's tornadoes are usually quaint little dust devils that pop up momentarily and never get the space to grow into city-destroying catastrophes. Yet it's the Sunshine State's mini-twisters that are the deadl ... More >>
It's been nine years since the double-whammy of Katrina and Wilma walloped Miami, and the Magic City has coasted through every hurricane season since without a scratch. Most weather experts have predicted more of the same this year, with another strong El Niño system tamping down tropical storms. ... More >>
Have you noticed there haven't been any hurricanes this year? It's hard to miss a palm tree floating down the middle of Collins Avenue, but there hasn't even been a 'cane that's petered out in the middle of the Atlantic. Are you now realizing an alarming absence of those awesome local TV news segmen ... More >>
Tropical Storm Chantal was pronounced dead today at approximately 4:40 p.m. after dissipating in the Caribbean Sea about 260 miles south of Cuba. So all you relatively newly arrived folk who haven't gone through this hundreds of times before can all stop freaking out. Though, Chantal's remnants co ... More >>
You might want to think twice before forcing your local bank teller to cash last week's paycheck in all singles to hoard in your emergency bunker. Forecasters are still unsure if Tropical Storm Chantal will make it to Florida. If it does arrive, tentatively expect to have your Hypnotiq-fueled hurric ... More >>
It's the first Monday of hurricane season, which means all across the Sunshine State thousands are heading into work with the vague feeling they've forgotten something important (PSSST! Hurricane supplies, people. Specifically: vodka and board games.). Well, here's a kick in the ass to get that kit ... More >>
Technically it is actually the middle of winter, but Miami has had temperatures in the 80s for 15 straight days now. That's matched a record for the most days above 80 degrees in winter since records have been kept, according to CBS Miami. The previous stretch was in 2002, and it's expected we'll li ... More >>
WLTV's chief meteorologist Eduardo Rodriquez was just trying to deliver the weather forecast on Miami's Univision station when he was unexpectedly joined by a stray cat who wandered in from the parking lot. This shouldn't be much of a surprise to anyone, as well all know stray cats do whatever the h ... More >>
Oh hey Northeast, how you doing? Oh, you're about to get a hurricane. It's a Category One. That's cute. We totally didn't even hear about it. Oh, wait, that's all we're hearing about right now.Listen, we're kind of jealous. A hurricane comes towards Florida and it gets maybe a 30 second mention on C ... More >>
Hurricane Sandy isn't expected to make landfall in Florida, but the storm will still be annoying as the outer bands hit the southeastern part of the state throughout the day.Miami-Dade is under a tropical storm warning, meaning a lot of rain and wind are expected. The conditions are forecasted to la ... More >>
There's no need to raid Publix for water, hurricane shutters, vodka and "Golden Girls" DVDs just yet, but you might as well prepare yourself for a miserable end of the week thanks to Tropical Storm Sandy.The strengthening storm is set to become a Cat 1 hurricane before walloping Jamaica later today, ... More >>
The worst of Tropical Storm Isaac has officially blown through the Keys and into the Gulf this morning, though its sloppy remains are still drenching Dade. Riptide's storm experts have begun tallying the damage Isaac wrought in Florida: 80,000 or so without power, minor flooding here and there, and ... More >>
It's only fitting that on the 20th anniversary of Hurricane Andrew, there's a storm brewing out in the Caribbean (with another one nipping at Isaac's ankles). It is fiercely debated whether Hurricane Andrew was the worst natural disaster in American history. At the time, the Category 5 hurricane tha ... More >>
If you're like us at Riptide, your eyes have been rolling all morning watching NBC 6, CBS 4, Local 10, and WSVN make fools of themselves reporting on the "awful" conditions brought by Tropical Storm Isaac. Yeah, there's been some rain and wind, and Miami even experienced some brownouts last nig ... More >>
It's happening, people! Southern Miami-Dade and the Florida Keys are under a hurricane watch as Tropical Storm Isaac keeps moving northwest at 17 mph. The northern part of the county remains under a hurricane warning.The latest NOAA update has the storm making landfall in Cuba with max sustained win ... More >>
Riptide's crack meteorological team has just issued this update on Tropical Storm Isaac: 09:17:00 AM EST Due to favorable wind shear and hot ocean temps, by Monday TS Isaac is expected to rage with the devastating power of ten thousand nuclear bombs. It will personally find your house, smash each in ... More >>
Between the cash-hungry strip clubs, the prime-time Rick Scott speech, and the 50,000-plus conservatives and 20,000 protestors squaring off, Tampa is already going to be one insane circus from hell next week. The only thing that could possibly make the Republican National Convention better would be ... More >>
Bella Beach, a chic Mediterranean-inspired restaurant and lounge located at Trump International Beach Resort has come up with a mouth-watering idea: free "Hurricane Bella" shots, made with a blend of Malibu Passion Fruit Rum, orange and lime juice, simple syrup and Blue Curacao. For the next few mon ... More >>
Meteorologists at the National Weather Service have confirmed what your often used umbrella and wet shoes already knew: it's officially rainy season in South Florida, and it has been since last Tuesday. Uh, thanks for the heads up science.Mother Nature seemed to be impatient this year however, since ... More >>
Congratulations! You survived Emily, Irene, Rina, and all those other storms that threatened to come near us, yet never did. Yes, we've endured another hurricane season, and we won't even have to think about any possible category fives until next June.
Crack reporter Dan Rather rockin' out like a freakin' hurricane.One of the biggest drags about living in South Florida is the fact that we don't experience a change of season. Save one ... The dreaded hurricane season. It's bad enough we can't look forward to the leaves changing colors. Or bein ... More >>
Well, Katy Perry, for your information Florida does feel like a paper bag. A dry, worn out paper bag that could catch fire at any moment and cause millions of acres of forest to go up in smoke thanks to the drought.According to The Palm Beach Post, while firework sales are up in pretty much every ... More >>
Michael E. MillerHaitian president Michel "Sweet Micky" MartellyHurricane season starts tomorrow. And while South Florida is again bracing for the big one, nearby Haiti is still dangerously behind schedule after last year's devastating earthquake.Last summer the still-grieving country escaped the ... More >>
Miami's least favorite time of year, Hurricane Season, kicks off officially on June 1st, and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration is predicting an above average Atlantic season with as many as 18 named storms, ten hurricanes and six major hurricanes.
Don't give us that look -- you're not that tough, Bonnie. The effects of Tropical Storm Bonnie are ripping through Miami, and while we here at New Times are no meteorological experts, we're projecting that the storm will be a "major pain in the ass" until this afternoon and then will be downgrade ... More >>
via National Hurricane CenterThe Cone of Panic! Cue the breathless local TV announcers and the runs on milk, bread, and stout whiskey at Publix: Miami is officially in line to get hit with its first tropical storm of the season.The National Hurricane Center just issued a tropical storm warning fo ... More >>
Forecaster predicts an "above normal" Hurricane season in 2010, with about two or three hurricanes making landfall in the U.S. [Herald]Florida is number three in total foreclosure filings. [Herald]And here's another cherry stat: Unemployment in Florida is at an all-time high of 11.9 percent. [CBS4]A ... More >>
From a local standpoint, the recently concluded hurricane season seemed to be a non-event, but less lucky locales such as Cuba and Haiti got hit hard by strong storms. Overall, it was an above average season, and next year is shaping up to follow in its path. A well-respected Colorado State Universi ... More >>
Jose D. Duran A soaked Monday night along North Miami Avenue. As the outer bands of Tropical Storm Fay went over South Florida, local stations were having a field day. It had been some time since the area was threaten by storm. WSVN reporter Rene Marsh stood along the shore of some unnamed beach is ... More >>
Jamie Adams via Wikimedia Commons Fay, lame lassy that she was, didn’t stop South Florida’s gamblers from seizing on the excuse to hunker down at a felt table. As the squall squealed Monday evening, the Miccosukee casino swelled as if it was Stimulus Check Season all over again. Besides the cro ... More >>
National Weather Service and National Hurricane Center
Hurricane season howls again
WPLG-TV (Channel 10)
Aim giant fans toward the ocean. Irrigate Africa. Fire NOAA. And other paranoid rants from the feds' conceptually challenged file.
When authorities pledged to reflood the Everglades, they tried to accommodate residents of the 8 1/2 Square Mile Area in Southwest Dade. They're still trying.
Destruction. Upheaval. Change. Rebirth. In the two years since Hurricane Andrew, Biscayne National Park has had to learn an entirely new vocabulary
Six weeks into hurricane season, and barely a sprinkle. Forget the so-called weather experts, it's time for some real forecasting.