• Blogs

    August 22, 2014

    Miami Central Football Coach Receives Racial Slur-Loaded Hate Mail As Team Travels to Alabama

    Tomorrow night, the Miami Central Rockets, the 8th best high school football team in the nation according to USA Today, will gear up in Hoover, Alabama to take on the 3rd ranked Hoover High. Though some ugliness already hangs over the game, as Miami Central head coach Roland Smith reported receivi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 21, 2014

    Katherine the Great White Shark Was Back Off Miami Beach Last Week

    Katherine, a 14-foot great white shark that has spent the past several months off the coast of Florida, was back in South Florida last week. Katherine was tagged last August by marine biologists off Cape Cod, and they've been tracking her ever since. Earlier this year she headed down south and spe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 17, 2014

    LeBron James Topped Jersey Sales This Season; Heat Top Team

    The Miami Heat may be entering the NBA playoffs as a second seed, but they're tops in another set of standings. For the sixth time, LeBron James' jersey was the top seller in the league. The Miami Heat, meanwhile, sold more merchandise this season than any other team.

  • Blogs

    March 11, 2014

    Florida Hopes to Set Record for Spring Break Visitors This Year

    Florida may lag behind other states on several more important scales, but when it comes to attracting drunk college kids and other tourists during this time of year, we're still king. According to USA Today, Florida appears ready to shatter its previous records this year for most visitors to the s ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 22, 2013

    USC AD Already Complaining About NCAA's Miami Verdict

    While Miami fans were practically celebrating after the NCAA announced this morning that they'd only add on a few relatively light penalties to the ones the Hurricanes had already self-imposed, fans of another storied college football team at a private school in a major subtropical city across the m ... More >>

  • Music

    August 29, 2013
  • Blogs

    August 27, 2013

    Miami's Ten Best Labor Day 2013 Parties

    We all spend our days slaving away, flipping burgers, serving slop, pouring drinks, hauling trash, driving big rigs, selling cars, cuffing creeps, dancing on poles, counting other people's cash, or tapping data into crappy old desktop computers. But our nights (and paychecks) are gloriously wasted ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 13, 2013

    LeBron James Won't Run For NBPA President After All

    Apparently, when you're already the King you decide you don't want to be president after all. Despite assertions that LeBron James was mulling a bid to run for president of the NBA Players Association, he's now reportedly decided against the move.

  • Blogs

    February 11, 2013

    Miami Hurricanes Basketball Ranked Third in AP Poll

    The Miami Hurricanes men's basketball team is now ranked third in the AP poll, the highest ranking ever in the team's history. Last week, the Canes were ranked 8th.The team continued on its unbeaten path in the ACC this week by knocking off both Boston College and North Carolina in home court blood ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 14, 2012

    Florida Is Set to Issue Its One Millionth Concealed Carry Permit Next Week

    Florida is on pace to become the first state to issue its one millionth active concealed carry permit sometime next week, as more than 167,000 permits are issued each year. Florida has already issued more concealed carry permits than any other state, and is set to become the first to break the one m ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 16, 2012

    Report: Miami Is A Finalist to Host Super Bowl L

    Remember when NFL officials inferred that Miami might never host another Super Bowl unless serious upgrades were made to Sun Life Stadium? Apparently they weren't too serious about that threat. According to USA Today, Miami will be announced as one of two finalists to host Super Bowl L in 2016. Whic ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 11, 2012

    Gabby Douglas Deserves To Be Praised, Not Ridiculed

    Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke wants blacks to stop being so envious and hateful toward one another.We African-Americans are our own worst enemies. We do a bett ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 31, 2012

    Condoleezza Rice and Marco Rubio Are The GOP's Golden Tokens

    Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. Today, Luke explains how minorities rise up the ranks of the GOP.During her speech at the National Republican Convention last week, former Secret ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 18, 2012

    Surfing, Pinball, and Weed: Perry Farrell on His Teen Years in Miami

    See also "Jane's Addiction's Perry Farrell Comments on Tom Gabel's Transgender Announcement." When Jane's Addiction brings its rock party to the Fillmore Miami Beach tonight, it will be a homecoming show for the band's frontman, Perry Farrell. "I moved to Miami Beach when I was about fourteen, sho ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 24, 2012

    Florida Schools' 30-Year Streak of Producing First-Round NFL Draft Picks Could End

    We all know the University of Miami's historic streak of having a football player taken in the first round of every single NFL draft between 1995 and 2008 is now a thing of the past, but an even longer streak may come to an end this year.Every single year since 1981 a player from either UM, UF or FS ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 22, 2011

    Miami Herald Has Less News Aggregation Ethics Than Huffington Post Miami

    ​There's a media fight brewing in Miami between the old paper giant and the new local iteration of a quickly growing Internet media monster. Random Pixels blogger Bill Cooke, ever the keen-eyed instigator, noticed that the recently launched Huffington Post Miami was cribbing quite liberally from M ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 7, 2011

    Jacory Harris to Start Against Ohio State

    ​Jacory Harris will start for the Miami Hurricanes when the team makes its home debut in ten days against Ohio State according to USA Today. Harris, a senior, sat out the Maryland game due to his involvement in the Nevin Shapiro scandal, but will return to take over his starting duties despite ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 24, 2011

    Florida Marlins Not First Baseball Players To Be Spooked By Ghosts At St. Petersburg's Vinoy Hotel

    "That voice just now-- what was it?"​We like the idea that, in his final hours as the Florida Marlins manager, Edwin Rodriguez spent his time comforting relief pitchers who were terrified of ghosts. It'd be fitting for one of the youngest teams in baseball.

  • Blogs

    June 2, 2011

    LeBron James to Open Lifestyle Store "Unknwn" in Miami

    The store's logo. ​LeBron James isn't just a businessman; he's a business, man. Yes, the Miami Heat superstar isn't just building a legacy in Miami; he's building a business here too. James today announced plans to open a high-end lifestyle store called "Unknwn." 

  • Blogs

    April 28, 2011

    Liván Hernández, Former Marlins Pitcher, Linked to Drug Trafficking Investigation

    ​Liván Hernández, the Cuban defector who made his MLB debut with the Florida Marlins and pitched for the team for three seasons, is in hot water after an investigation has linked him to drug trafficker Angel Ayala Vázquez, AKA Angelo Millones.''

  • Blogs

    March 23, 2011

    Biggest Loser Announces Weight Loss Cruise Leaving from Miami

    O​ne of the highlights of any cruise experience is the never-ending free food. In fact, more than most types of vacations, cruises are expected to come with a bit of a weight gain. Without the food, you're struck on a giant ship in a small room with a bunch of strange people wearing sandals and bl ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 22, 2010

    Miami Central Finishes Season Ranked #8 in the Nation in USA Today Poll

    After an opening-day loss, a state championship will have to be enough for Central​With state title rings on their fingers, it's hard to feel sorry for the Miami Central Rockets. Still, it bears remembering that Central was just one blown call away from a mythical national championship. After all, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 21, 2010

    Rick Scott Snubs South Florida In His Inaugural Parade -- Maybe For the Best

    Does this look like a guy you want to party with?​Inaugural parades are a time-honored American tradition, a treasured moment when fat corporate cats and scummy developers can make millions of dollars rain on a newly elected governor, all so he can throw a masturbatory party celebrating what a swe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 5, 2010

    Top 5 Vegan Restaurants in South Florida

    Riki Altman​Vegan restaurants in Miami are rare. For the most part, they cater to a granola-munching, Birkenstock-wearing demographic, but neglect the rest of us who just like to eat. Maybe veganism would be more widely accepted if it struck a balance between looking appetizing and providin ... More >>

  • News

    October 21, 2010
  • Blogs

    October 19, 2010

    High School Football Coaches Deserve More Cash

    ​Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke tackles high school football coaching salaries.Florida -- and Miami-Dade -- seriously need to change the way high school ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 3, 2010

    Miami Central Opens Season Against Camden County, GA in Battle of Speed vs. Size

    Fast or Fat? Miami Central faces off against Georgia champs Camden CountyThey grow their boys a little bigger here in Georgia. But as our mother always told us, size doesn't matter. Right? The speedy Miami Central Rockets start their season tonight against the heavy (hitting) Camden County Wi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 12, 2010

    Dolphins Misspell Dwyane Wade's Name in Congratulatory Ad

    via NBCMiami​The Miami Dolphins aren't jealous that the Miami Heat pretty much stole their title as the city's favorite sports team with the signing of Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh, and LeBron James. No, sir. In fact, they put a full-page ad in both the Miami Herald and the Sun-Sentinel this weekend co ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 17, 2010

    News Roundup: Miami Gardens Is Deadly

    A driver in Miami Gardens hit a 51-year-old woman, leaving her brain dead, and then fled the scene. Authorities and the family are asking for help tracking down the driver. [CBS4]A father of six early this morning was shot to death in a shower of gunfire outside his home in Miami Gardens. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 1, 2010

    Florida is the Deadliest State for Pedestrians and Bicyclists

    C. StileA memorial for slain bicyclist Chistophe Le Canne is a grim reminder of how deadly Florida's roads can be​17.4 percent of all bicyclist deaths in America occur in Florida, which only makes up about 6 percent of the total population. Basically, Florida is the Red Asphalt State. Accordi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 4, 2010

    Miami Is the Fifth Least Drunk City in America: Yes, You Read That Correctly

    ​According to a new study by the listicle-loving Men's Health, Miami is the fifth least drunk city in all of America. Yes, 100 of America's biggest cities were tallied up and arranged from most drunk (which happens to be Fresno, California) to least, and Miami came in at 96.See, we really aren't a ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 3, 2010

    News Roundup: Super Bowl Stage Collapse Injures Four

    An audit criticized the waste of tens of thousands of tax-payer dollars by city of Miami workers on Government credit cards. Some how we got stiffed with the bill for a pink metallic dog collar. [Herald]A stage being built at Sun Life stadium collapsed, injuring four. [CBS4]Jackson Memoria ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 26, 2010

    Tim Tebow Pro-Life Super Bowl Ad Stirs Up Controversy

    Predictably, Tim Tebow's Super Bowl ad for the politically divisive, anti-gay, and pro-choice group Focus on the Family is causing controversy.Focus has released few details about the ad, but it will likely feature UF's Heisman winner and his mother, Pam Tebow. Pam notably carried Tim to term despit ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 12, 2009

    RPOF Chair: Pelosi Will Force You To Get an Abortion

    ​I think everyone can agree we need to reform health care in this country one way or another (if you don't you're either greedy or not paying attention), and since the Democrats are currently in control they're the ones taking a shot at it. Speaker Nancy Pelosi and House Majoirty Leader Steny ... More >>

  • Music

    May 21, 2009
  • Blogs

    April 20, 2009

    News Roundup

    Miami Beach hires  one of the world's most well known architects, Frank Gehry, to design a new home for the New World Symphony. then it seriously asks him to reduce his fee. Gehry may leave the project. [Architect's Journal] Former Miami Beach Mayor and former jailbird Alex Daoud was  ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 26, 2009

    News Roundup

    There was this horrible, senseless shooting in Liberty City. Sigh. Authorities want information on a masked gunmen. [CNN]The Speaker of the Florida House continues to lawyer up and refuses to resign as of yet. [Herald]Carl Hiaasen: "Republican lawmakers would rather invest in new asphalt than in you ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 29, 2008

    Big Tuna Ready to Flee the Fins? For Detroit?!

    So is Bill Parcells a masochist, or what? This is the guy who voluntarily went to work for borderline-psychotic Dallas owner Jerry Jones, who left a cushy retirement to take over the staggeringly awful 1-15 Dolphins. For all Riptide knows, he's got a side gig involving a rubber ball mouth-gag, a bas ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 25, 2008

    Pigs Fly, Dolphins Hailed as Innovators of the NFL

    To file under "Shit We Would Not Have Wagered A Single Nickel On One Week Ago": In offices cluttered with Xs-and-Os and in pungent locker-rooms across America, the nation's great offensive minds have been up late all week feverishly studying the latest mad geniuses of the National Football League. ... More >>

  • News

    June 9, 2005

    Newsroom or Classroom?

    Old newspaper pros quit the FIU journalism school as academicians run the show

  • Diversions

    May 16, 2002
  • News

    September 2, 1999


    Serious downplaying

  • News

    September 24, 1998
  • News

    November 14, 1996
  • Dining

    February 22, 1996
  • Music

    May 4, 1994

    Counting Down

    It was only a matter of time before the critics turned on the Crows

  • Music

    March 10, 1993

    The Island Club

    So the Mavericks are a hit in the Caymans. What's wrong with America? Could it be A radio?

  • News

    May 6, 1992
  • More >>