Tampa

Florida Secretly Shortened Yellow Light Times To Bust More Drivers With Red-Light Cameras

Remember when you got popped with that red light camera ticket last month and then ranted to anyone who'd listen about how it was all a giant conspiracy? "The yellow is too short!" you shrieked, waving your ticket in the air as everyone laughed. "They did it on purpose!" Well, you don't look so cra ... More >>

Guitar Master Yngwie Malmsteen on Miami Heat: "LeBron James Is a F#$%in' Virtuoso"

Yngwie Malmsteen is a six-foot, three-inch guitar monster from Sweden. He left the dark and bitter cold of Stockholm at age 19 and moved to L.A. for a record deal, got famous, and drunkenly crashed a Jaguar E-Type V12 convertible into a tree, breaking the steering wheel with his head. But Malmsteen ... More >>

Acropolis Greek Taverna to Host Grand OPA-ning Party: Free Food and Drink

Walk into Acropolis Greek Taverna and you might swear you've just become an extra in the comedy favorite "My Big Fat Greek Wedding. The small Tampa-based restaurant chain, which has locations in New Tampa; Ybor City; Riverview; and St. Petersburg, has just opened in Coconut Grove, serving a dose of ... More >>

Don't Worry, Miami: You (Probably) Won't Be Swallowed by a Sinkhole

With news that a second sinkhole has opened a mere two miles from the Tampa-area site where last week a man died after being swallowed by a sinkhole that formed under his home, you might be worried the entire state is sinking. Well, as you should know, Miami is a far different place from Tampa, and ... More >>

Rat Bastard's International Noise Conference: Insane 135-Act Lineup, Celebrates 10 Years

According to the Internet, a ten year anniversary is to be celebrated with diamonds. Because "a marriage that lasts ten years is as durable and beautiful as a diamond."Now, "durable" and "beautiful" may not be the first words one associates with Frank "Rat Bastard" Falestra's annual International N ... More >>

World of Beer Adding Two Miami Locations UPDATED

World of Beer, a Tampa-based chain of beer bars, is opening its second Miami location in Kendall on December 3 at 3 p.m. The new WOB will be centrally located within the shops at The Palms in Town and Country, across from Outback Steakhouse.Schenbly Miami Brewing Company will also be on-hand providi ... More >>

Hibernus Mortis's Ralf Varela Talks Florida Death Metal and His Band's Legacy of Brutality

Hibernus Mortis may be South Florida's greatest death metal band of all time. And a big part of that has to do with a long tenure as South Florida's only death metal band. While the Sunshine State's Gulf Coast can tout a robust history of Cookie Monster deathcries and bangover-inducing head-whips, ... More >>

50 Reasons Why Miami Is Better Than Every City on Bloomberg's 50 Best Cities List

Bloomberg Businessweek recently decided to count down the top 50 best cities in America, and Miami doesn't even make their list.They even based their rankings on attributes like leisure activities (including bars, restaurants, and sports teams), and clean air. So, you'd think we'd at least make it o ... More >>

RNC Madness: Scenes From a Week Among the GOP Faithful in Tampa

RNC 2012: The Seven Craziest GOP Souvenirs at the Republican National Convention

Check out our slide shows: "Inside the Republican National Convention 2012 at Tampa Bay Times Forum," and "Republican National Convention 2012 Tampa Day Two." Tampa's rich with GOP swag this week as thousands of Republicans gather to show off their favorite Mitt Romney mementos and Paul Ryan tchot ... More >>

Tampa Strippers Frustrated Over Lack of Horny Conservatives at RNC So Far

Perhaps no industry geared up for the Republican National Convention like Tampa's strip club scene. Clubs redecorated, added extra privacy, revamped their food menus, and even brought in famous talent. Yet, on Sunday night at least, the clubs seemed pretty barren ahead of the start of the convention ... More >>

Tropical Storm Isaac: Miami Concert Cancellations

While the rest of the nation is freaking out about the potential effect of a category-two hurricane on the Republican National Convention in Tampa, we here at Crossfade are focused on only one thing ... Will any of this week's awesome parties and concerts get rained out by that evil tropical cyclon ... More >>

Five RNC Contingency Plans If Tropical Storm Isaac Ruins The GOP Party

Is tropical storm Isaac God's way of smiting Tod Akin for saying stupid sh*t? Is it a coincidence that the squall is set to touch down at the very moment that Rick Scott takes to the podium in Tampa? Does Jesus just hate the GOP?Get a hold of yourself, man! Rule No. 1 in an emergency like this: don' ... More >>

How to Speak Republican: Leaked Document Reveals the Secrets of the GOP's Coded Language

Tropical Storm Isaac: On Track to Destroy the RNC In Tampa

In a story straight out of a twisted fever dream shared by Michael Bay and Aaron Sorkin -- not to mention the sick fantasies of thousands of catastrophe-seeking journalists everywhere -- Tropical Storm Isaac looks more likely than ever to strengthen into a hurricane just in time to bear down on Tamp ... More >>

Tropical Storm Isaac Close To Forming, Could Threaten RNC In Tampa

Between the cash-hungry strip clubs, the prime-time Rick Scott speech, and the 50,000-plus conservatives and 20,000 protestors squaring off, Tampa is already going to be one insane circus from hell next week. The only thing that could possibly make the Republican National Convention better would be ... More >>

Aasif Mandvi Explains Why The RNC Chose Tampa: "We Have the Best Strip Clubs in the World"

Read our full gonzo guide to the RNC: "Fear and Loathing In Tampa"Screw Geraldo Rivera. Bugger off Wolf Blitzer. When it came time to pick a guide to this year's Republican National Convention in Tampa, we went with Daily Show correspondent Aasif Mandvi. He may play a Middle Eastern correspondent on ... More >>

Tampa Police Cracking Down On Prostitution As Sex-Crazed Republicans Come To Town

Tampa's strip club industry is preparing for a cash-making bonanza next week as tens of thousands of Republicans come to town to blather on about family values all day before hitting Ybor City at night to get hammered and ogle some T&A. But Tampa police are drawing a line in the sand: GOP delega ... More >>

Whiskey Joe's Bar & Grill Brings Key West to Key Biscayne

There are actually more beach-themed bars that play Jimmy Buffet and Bob Marley in Manhattan than in Miami. Which is a sincere shame because sometimes you just want to put on your best flip flops, drink a rum punch, and enjoy the warm sun and salt-tinged breezes.Parrotheads rejoice, because Whiskey ... More >>

The Daily Show Will Broadcast From Florida During RNC

Left-leaning Floridians are probably not too enthused that the Republican Party is descending on Tampa to crown Mitt Romney as its official nominee in August. But don't worry, you hippies -- there's now something for you to get excited about, too. The Daily Show has announced it'll tape a week's wor ... More >>

Tampa Strip Clubs Prepare for Horny Conservatives During Republican National Convention

In late August, hundreds of thousands of Republican heavyweights will descend on Tampa to officially crown Mitt Romney their presidential nominee and celebrate their policies, which include abstinence-only education, limiting women's reproductive health choices, and an aversion to birth control and ... More >>

Want to Protest GOP Convention In Tampa? Be Ready to Pay $50, Leave Knives at Home

​Attention Miami-area anarchists, liberals, and Occupiers: Tampa Mayor Bob Buckhorn is worried about "knuckleheads" causing trouble during the Republican National Convention this August. So to keep all the Romney-disturbers in line, last night he proposed a "Clean Zone" across most of downtown Tam ... More >>

State Senator Cites Chris Rock Joke in Gambling Debate by Claiming Tampa is the Strip Club Capital of the World

​"People do not go to South Beach to see Mickey Mouse. They just don't," said state Sen. Ellyn Bogdanoff (R-Ft. Lauderdale) yesterday during a debate on her bill that would bring casinos to South Florida. "They go there for different reasons. We have the strip club capital of the world in Tampa. I ... More >>

Top Five Food Trends of 2011: Local Beers, Cheap Eats and Damned Tiny Cupcakes

​Looking back upon the year that was, it's not too difficult to narrow the field of food trends that gripped Miami's culinary scene. There are those that we love (local craft brews to go with your meal) and naturally, those that we hate (those silly mini-cupcakes that are everywhere), but overall, ... More >>

Fried Kool-Aid, Fried Bubblegum, and Brain-Freeze Burgers: Florida Fairs Are Coming

​"We try to keep it as new as we can. You've really got to stay ahead of the customers," says veteran food vendor Dennis Reas. He and wife Cheryl are based in Indiana but travel with their food truck to various festivals and fairs around the country. In case you weren't aware, the state-fair seaso ... More >>

Strippers Edition: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs Exotic Dancers

​Some things are so good, they should not be f*cked with: Starsky & Hutch, rum & coke, mugshots & Fridays.But rules are made to be broken, especially random-ass Riptide rules. So we present you with a special mid-week, Gulf Coast edition of Mugshots Friday Tuesday.Today's version is de ... More >>

Glow Away

Send Your Kids to Florida's Tea Party Summer Camp

Sorry, baby, those Bush-era adjustable doll house mortgages really screwed us all. ​Are you a faithful member of the Tea Party? Are you worried that your kids, little Ronnie and Reagan, aren't fully committed to your political cause? Well, why not have them stay with a relative in Tampa for a week ... More >>

Woman Busted for Buying Prostitute for Elderly Dad in Tampa

​Undoubtedly the first time Maurice Kirchberg held his daughter Pia 51 years ago, he looked down at the baby girl and thought, Someday, when I'm old and gray and completely devoid of sex, this baby girl will buy me a prostitute. Nothing quite cements that father-daughter bond like a lady buying a ... More >>

No, 70 People Were Not Trapped in an Airport Hangar Due to Central Florida's Crazy Weather

via Bay News 9​It's in the 80s and perfectly sunny here in Miami, but our state-mates in the central part of Florida aren't enjoying the same good weather. An apparent tornado that ripped through Tampa has left many areas in Central Florida in disarray. But a report carried by numerous national me ... More >>

Ten Supereclectic Acts Not to Miss at the International Noise Conference

Tampa's Neon Blud is the INC's rock spoiler.​See the full, three-day International Noise Conference 2011 lineup. People have the internet and it's hard to shock them. Once threatening musical aesthetics like punk and hip-hop have long been neutered and incorporated into the popular culture canon. ... More >>

Thousands of Angry Activists Expected to Destroy Tampa in 2012

It's like Miami, but with uglier beaches and whiter people. ​Tampa, our slightly "off" cousin to the North East, has been chosen to host the 2012 Republican National Convention in which the Grand Ol' Party will nominate Sarah Palin or Marco Rubio or Ron Paul or someone else slightly "off" to take ... More >>

70,000 Tons of Metal Adds Florida-Based Obituary

​After voyaging to Portugal last week, the 70,000 Tons of Metal tanker returns to American shores to welcome Tampa-based Obituary aboard. Now there are 13 bands confirmed for the cruise, which sets sail from Miami to Cozumel, Mexico, and heads back to Miami, Jan. 24-28, 2011. The self-proclaimed " ... More >>

Super Bowl 2010: Maxim and Playboy Parties Among This Year's Hottest Tickets, of Course

CC by 2.0, via P Keigan's FlickrThe bunnies are at the Sagamore on Saturday night.​Is it really any surprise? Maxim magazine's annual Super Bowl bash is famously full of the perky, pneumatic flesh featured in its pages, as well as all the celebrities, pseudo-celebrities, and just wealthy and well- ... More >>

Concert Review: Brother Bean at the Aura Music Festival, January 15 through 17

via myspace.com/brotherbeanA past photo of Brother Bean, who performed its final show at Aura.Brother Bean's final performance and Aura Music FestivalSeratoma Youth Ranch, Brooksville, FloridaJanuary 15 through 17, 2010Better Than: Crossing paths with a crazy redneck on a shooting rampage. The ... More >>

Slip N Slide DJ Purfiya Can't R.I.P. Because He's Not Dead

via myspace/djpurfiyaDJ Purfiya with Suga Shack from Wild 98.7​DJ Purfiya is from the city of Palmetto, Florida, just south of Tampa. He's affiliated with Miami's own Slip N Slide Records as one of their official DJs.Wednesday, rumors hit the Internet -- namely Twitter -- that he had died due to c ... More >>

Former Department of Children and Families Spokesman Pleads Guilty to Kiddy Porn

Albert Andre Zimmerman used to have a sweet gig being the mouthpiece for Florida's Department of Children and Families, the department charged with the well being of kids. That was until he was indicted for producing child pornography back in February, 2008, and yesterday he pleaded guilty to the ch ... More >>

Tampa Prudes Promise to Ruin Lingerie Bowl for Everyone

We understand the disgust some folks might feel when they're introduced to the idea of lingerie football. It's always something like "blah blah blah exploitation, vulgar, sexist blah blah blah." But this is America, and if pretty, young ladies want to be exploited or whatever by making money to play ... More >>

Miami Is Losing Its Buzz

Do you remember the citywide excitement last year when Miami was named the third most caffeinated city in the United States? Don't you remember all the parades and the front-page headlines and the outpouring of civic pride? Remember how we danced? Oh, how we danced, while each downing ten café c ... More >>

Full Q&A with Yo Majesty

Walk On the Dark Side

And now for something completely different

Last Chance to See "Bodies"

International Noise Conference

Home

"Push" (Brah/Jagjaguwar)

Get Monked Up

Monk and Rabbit in the Moon and attention-deficit-disorder music

Man-Eating Music in the Subtropics!

The Subtropics New Music Festival

Public Art, Private Parts

New Times and the Law

Program Notes

Local Is As Local Does

Miami could take a rock lesson or two