Taco Bell Corp.

Ten Things Miami's Terrible Drivers Need to Learn

Miami is notorious for its bad drivers. We know that it would be futile to try and teach you (yes, you) about things like the "speed limit" and that there is a difference between a yellow light and a freshly turned green light, but we figured someone should at least give you assholes a bit of a refr ... More >>

Taco Bell's Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Tacos Available Starting Tomorrow

Beginning tomorrow, fast-food fanatics can get their hands on the hotly anticipated Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Tacos, courtesy of Taco Bell. Just ask and ye shall receive. In response to apparently insane demand, the company announced via its Facebook page that it's rolling out the new treats a day ... More >>

Super Bowl: Six Shittiest Musical Commercials

So the Super Bowl turned 47. And as we all know, the Baltimore Ravens beat the San Francisco 49ers in a surprisingly hectic second-half, Beyonce reunited with her Destiny's Child homies, and the game stopped for a full 34 minutes when half of the stadium's the power mysteriously went out. But that' ... More >>

Super Bowl: Best Deals and Contests for the Big Game (Video)

The big game is only a few days away, and with it comes a host of marketing opportunities, commercials, promotions, contests, and giveaways. Each year, execs at major food and beverage companies wrack their brains for ways to get you, the consumer, to laugh, cry, and pull out your wallet before, dur ... More >>

The Five Things We Hate About Christmas (or Hanukkah, or Kwanzaa) Dinner

As a general rule, we're big fans of the holidays. Why? Because they involve eating gut-busting quantities of homemade food, scoring paid time off from work and drinking what would generally be unacceptable amounts of booze. But let's be honest - there are certain things about the holiday season t ... More >>

Bugatti Burrito Run: What's a $2.5 Million Car Doing in a Taco Bell Drive-Thru?

New Times Takes a $2.5 Million Bugatti Veyron Vitesse for a Spin (and a Burrito)

"Have you ever wrecked one of these?" I ask as our burnt-orange Bugatti Veyron Grand Sport Vitesse bursts onto the Julia Tuttle Causeway. Butch Leitzinger shakes his head. The mild-mannered man is Bugatti's official driver, but a better title would be "pilot." With a top speed of 260 mph, the Veyron ... More >>

Wash U.: Gain Weight and Get Paid

Would you eat a dozen churros every day for pay?Researchers at the Washington University School of Medicine are paying participants to eat, particularly fast food from McDonald's, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut.Participants are being compensated up to $3500 depending o ... More >>

McDonald's Tops on Twitter and Facebook, Plus Other Fast Food and Social Media Findings

Burger King has seen 105% fan growth on Facebook since January. McDonald's follower growth on Twitter has seen a 118% growth in the same period. Mickey Dee's also responds quickest to tweets than any other chain -- an average of 29 minutes.Compare that to Burger King, which takes over 60 hours to re ... More >>

Lorena Garcia's Taco Bell Cantina Bowl: Without Linen and Fine Crockery

Last week we tried Lorena Garcia's Cantina Bowl at her studio kitchen. On fine china. With some good wine. The occasion was a media blitz before the official rollout of Taco Bell's new mini-line of chef-driven offerings. Lorena Garcia -- chef, author, television personality, and restaurateur -- was ... More >>

Chris Bosh Went to Taco Bell Right After Winning Championship

Super Bowl champs go to Disney World, but apparently NBA Champs go to Taco Bell.Chris Bosh was on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night, and admitted that his first stop after winning his first ring was the drive through of the Taco Bell. He did however end up at LIV with the rest of team, but goofs with Kim ... More >>

Lorena Garcia's Taco Bell Cantina Bowl Not a Core Shaker

Last night a select dozen or so people were invited to try celebrity chef Lorena Garcia's latest dish. The affair, held at Garcia's midtown Miami studio, was stellar. From the complimentary valet parking to the bartender serving cilantro-infused cocktails, the evening was five-star. Garcia's test ki ... More >>

Miami Chef Lorena Garcia Created Taco Bell's New "Cantina" Menu

On July 5, the Taco Bell menu will transform into a new "upscale" Cantina Bell menu that some are saying rivals Chipotle.The new high-quality and value-driven menu comes from the mind of Miami chef Lorena Garcia. It will feature items like a Cantina Burrito, a Cantina Burrito Bowl and tacos mad ... More >>

Snoop Dogg's Rolling Words Smokable Book and Four Other 4/20 Gifts for Stoners

There's no doubt that Snoop Dogg knows how to celebrate 4/20. But the rapper has decided to prove himself yet again. Snoop recently announced that he will be releasing a novel, Rolling Words: A Smokable Songbook. Yes, you read right. A regular book would be too boring. So if you want to smoke whi ... More >>

Frito-Lay Helps Taco Bell Reinvent the Taco Shell, Tastes Like Beefy, Cheesy Doritos

​After a successful test run in three American cities, Taco Bell last Thursday rolled out its newest menu item--Doritos Locos Tacos, a new crunchy taco with a shell made with Frito-Lay's nacho cheese-flavored Doritos chips and filled with beef, lettuce and shredded cheddar cheese.The Irvine-based ... More >>

Man Stabbed for Mistaking Harmonicas for Tacos

​Tacos are a delicious concoction of tortilla, meats and cheeses. Harmonicas are a bluesy free-reed wind instrument. It is best to never mix the two up. The consequences could be dire.

Ten Foods To Avoid On Valentine's Day

​Every year we say we're not going to celebrate Valentine's Day. After all, it makes singles feel bad for being single and couples feel worse for not being over-the-top romantics. Then we break down and buy candy hearts and make reservations for overpriced champagne dinners.Since you're probably l ... More >>

Strip Joints and Taco Bell: Five Worst Places to Take a Date on Valentine's Day

​We at Short Order take great pleasure in offering you the top options for Valentine's Day and the most affordable ones, too. But what we really get a kick out of is giving you the worst options - because those are often the most insane, hilarious, and outright brilliant.We don't discourage doing ... More >>

Pitbull's "Niggas in Paris" Remix: YouTubers React Via Nasty, Negative Comments

​Pitbull dropped his directorial debut video for "Latinos in Paris" last week and somehow managed to slip under our Google Alert radar. Together with Dominican rapper Sensato, Armando Perez can be seen bilingual rapping 'round the City of Lights, popping bottles at relevant Parisian nightclubs, ... More >>

Weird Florida News This Year: Floridians Have Broken All Seven Cardinal Sins

​Miami may be some sort of strange Banana Republican in and of itself, but, man, the rest of Florida makes us look positively sane in comparison. When Vice magazine called it "a violent, dong-shaped netherworld" earlier this year they weren't over-exaggerating. In fact, in 2011 Riptide inauguratio ... More >>

Beet Reporter Hustled into Breaking Vegan Diet with $2 Taco Bell Burrito

​​As I stood in line at a Taco Bell on NE 36th Street and Biscayne Boulevard, I was not comfortable or hopeful. It had been a long time since I'd been in a fast food joint, and the proximity of all the nutritionally bankrupt white flour tortillas, preservative-packed foodstuffs, and grade D meat ... More >>

Drunk Florida Man Tries to Use Taco as ID After His Car Catches Fire at Taco Bell

​Tacos are not recognized as legal forms of identification in the state of Florida [insert bad joke about immigration laws here]. Matthew Falkner found out the hard way after he passed out drunk in the drive-thru of a Jensen Beach Taco Bell and his car caught fire [insert bad joke about Taco Bell' ... More >>

Das Racist at Grand Central October 9

Das Racist Scarfs Fast Food, Mangles Mikes, and Makes Fun of Michael Jackson

Photo by Bek Andersen​In the hot-as-balls summer of 2009, three dudes from New York City -- rappers Himanshu "Heems" Suri and Victor "Kool A.D." Vazquez, and hype guy Ashok "Dapwell" Kondabolu -- banded together under the vaguely ominous moniker Das Racist, made some beats, spit some rhymes, smok ... More >>

Florida's Fast-Food Rage: Two Decades of Grease-Fiending Violence and Insanity

​Is there a pastime more Floridian than going completely nuts -- we mean Michael-Douglas-in-Falling-Down-apeshit -- when denied our favorite fast-food product?Florida luminary Terry Lynn Kimbell was really just carrying on a long tradition when he recently called 911 to complain that Tac ... More >>

Drunk Florida Man Calls 911 Because Taco Bell Won't Serve Him Tacos

​Terry Lynn Kimbell, 50, of Pinellas County, was in a classic conundrum Tuesday evening: He was drunk and wanted Taco Bell. But by that time of night, Taco Bell was serving its hot, meaty fast food only through the drive-thru, so he decided to walk through it. When employees refused to s ... More >>

BK Tops the Dollar Cheeseburger Derby

Spoiler alert: None of the burgers are this one.​Ah, the dollar menu -- the primary source of sustenance for many a student and hobo. Each has its own strong points, but all that we visited had one thing in common: a cheeseburger. (For argument's sake, we are defining "burger" as any roll-ba ... More >>

"Udonis Haslem," O'Grime, and Metro Zu Say: "F%$# the Mavericks, Bitch!"

A friendly message for the Mavs.​The last time Crossfade got weird with the O'Grime boys, we bumrushed a Taco Bell, scrubbed ourselves down with Mexican meat, and wasted $400 on 15 minutes with a stripper slathered in nacho cheese. In a word, it was awesome. And really, there's only one scenario ... More >>

Big Mac Vs. Whopper: Which Bun Contains More Crap?

​It just isn't fair that Taco Bell is getting all the free press these days concerning integrity of ingredients -- or lack thereof. Granted, nobody is accusing McDonald's or Burger King of faking beef content, but what about the other stuff that goes between the buns? The sauce lathered upon B ... More >>

Taco Bell Hit With Lawsuit: Can Its Beef Be Legally Called Beef?

Where's The Beef?​The Sun Sentinel reported yesterday that a California woman, Amanda Obney, has brought a false-advertising lawsuit against Taco Bell for calling its products "seasoned ground beef or seasoned beef" -- when, the suit declares, "in fact a substantial amount of the filling contains ... More >>

Top Five Reasons Taco Bell Might Actually Be More Dangerous Than MTV's Skins

​MTV's latest series Skins aired its first episode last week (and its second last night) to the tune of a whole lot of controversy. From CNN to MSNBC to the friggin' Today Show, comparisons likening the show to "child pornography" and claiming it's "like peer pressure on steroids" have been swirl ... More >>

A Posner family Christmas card

Top Ten Christmas Gifts for the Broke-Ass Musician

Photo by Lorri AuerGift No. 1: Your broke-ass musician needs new socks in a serious way.Are you a broke-ass? Well,​ Rock Kulture-Miami is throwing a very special party tonight at Vinyl & Kai just for people like you. It's called I'm Broke and It's Almost Xmas Rock-N-Art Show.The ... More >>

Tonight: The Alibi Celebrates One Year of Serving Greasy Late-Night Bites

Photo by Natalia MolinaThe Alibi's black board.​You're drunk and hungry. There is always Taco Bell, but even though you are an incoherent mess, you're still a foodie. So for you there is the Alibi, the small counter service inside South Beach's Lost Weekend. The menu features Philly cheese steaks, ... More >>

Plato Royale: Battle of Chicken Tacos -- Taco Bell vs. Latin Burger and Taco

The people at Taco Bell are again thinking outside the bun. With their new cantina tacos, the creators of the "fourth meal" are attempting to beef up their over-Americanized menu with their take on taco truck goods.The cantina options are described in a Taco Bell press release as "fre ... More >>

These lucky Chihuahuas made it big

They Might Be Tiny, But These Lucky Dogs Sure Made It Big

​When we saw that the Wall Street Journal whipped up a stipple portrait of Conchita, the Ginger-wig-wearing Chihuahua that belonged to the late Miami socialite Gail Posner, Banana Republican got to thinking what a grand life these little bug-eyed rat-dogs lead. So we compiled a list of the five mo ... More >>

Taco Bell 79 Cent Crispy Potato Soft Taco Review

Jacob KatelThe Crispy Potato Soft Taco as eaten on Biscayne Bay.​We once heard a comedian say all Mexican food was pretty much the same ingredients put together under different names. For example, what are nachos? Umm, beans, cheese, lettuce, tomato, tortillas, meat, salsa. And what are tacos? Umm ... More >>

FFF: Fast Food, Tuna, and Turkey Bologna

​I was just walking down the street, and I saw this restaurant called McDonald's Express. Let's see if we can try to wrap our brains around this concept -- this is a McDonald's, only faster. So, obviously, the McDonald's corporation thinks there are people out there saying to themselves, 'God, I'd ... More >>

Update: Miami Cops Looking for Suspect in Early-Morning Taco Rage Shooting

Around 3:40 this morning, a 20-something black man in a white SUV rolled up to the Taco Bell at NE 79th Street and Sixth Avenue with a serious jones for some cheese and refried beans.via Wikimedia Commons​Big problem: The Taco Bell had already shut down for the night. When the man rolled up t ... More >>

The Upper West Side Meets the Upper Room

Taco Bell Dog Dead, Top 5 Messages From Beyond The Grave

So the Taco Bell dog is dead...supposedly. Here are Gidget's top 5 messages from beyond the grave in this ghostly Short Order exclusive. Enjoy.

America's Most Wanted Recipes in Miami

image via simonandschuster.comAmerica's Most Wanted Recipes takes a simple precept, that people love mass produced corporate formula food, and exploits it. You gotta give credit to author Ron Douglas who has been profiting off our shackles to the chains through his website RecipeSecrets.net since 20 ... More >>

Turn the Tables on Poor Design

Slave Grown Tomatoes - Happy New Year From Immokalee

If you buy your tomatoes at a major supermarket or eat at McDonalds, Burger King, Taco Bell or Subway, then you may well be biting into the blood-and-sweat product of forced- labor-induced plantation agriculture, a.k.a. slavery, from the fields of Immokalee, where crack-cocaine meets whips and chain ... More >>

Latino Arts Afire

Car Food Survival: Altoids?

Hey, those almost-empty water bottles and mints may go a long way someday

Best Funky Neighborhood Restaurant

Delicias del Mar Peruano

News of the Weird

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