April Fool's Day may have past, but it's no joke that you're still broke. Now that the weekend is here, you wish you would have spared all that cash you spent on trying to fool your significant other into thinking you had a sex change - it was a horrible prank idea from the start, but hey, that's wh ... More >>
It's Friday and come 5 p.m., you'll want to run out of the office as if you were escaping the zombie apocalypse.
You rush home with the intention to get ready for one of the last parties of WMC, but then realize that you blew all your money on all the other parties at the Clevelander, Shelborne, an ... More >>
A quick and handy beginner's guide to doin' the Swamp Stomp:
1. Mosh 'round the daisy chain.
2. Get sloshed and/or sugar high, depending on whether you've reached Florida's legal boozing age.
3 Wallow in the mud like a big fat Everglades bullfrog.
Oh, and you obviously need tickets too. But lucki ... More >>
Ever licked a frog's ass? Sucker-punched the Swamp Ape? Square danced with a human gator?
Well, show up at Tobacco Road (AKA Miami's oldest, baddest, and most reliably awesome former whorehouse and speakeasy) in 24 days for the seventh annual edition of Swamp Stomp.
Presented by New Times, Yo!, P ... More >>
With the recession three years behind us, you'd think the unemployment rate would be a little lower than 8.2 percent, right?
Sadly, it's not the case. American employers only added about 80,000 jobs last month, according to the Labor Department, leaving the unemployment rate hovering just over a d ... More >>
The Allstars' DJ Le Spam.Spend Friday the 13th in Key West. But don't go to sleep.
Machete clawed janitors in Bermuda shorts could creepsurf your dreaming brainwaves. You might wake up next to a she-crab full of hot, musky soup. You will miss out on the party at a musiholic paradise calle ... More >>
Surfer Blood is, like, superfamous.
The West Palm foursome has been almost singlehandedly spreading South Florida's indie rock message, playing every music festival imaginable, including SXSW, CMJ, and even ATP's Nightmare Before Christmas. In fact, this crew may be the hottest white-boy thang t ... More >>
Coconut Grove's newest addition, Central Beer Garden, will open to the public just in time for Cinco de Mayo celebrations. Along with its sister Sushi Central Lounge the venue is located on the fourth floor of CocoWalk. Boasting more than 60 beers on tap, they will also offer "hearty foods an ... More >>
Ghana's soul rebel Rocky Dawani.Can you hear that slow-building beat rumbling through the streets? It doesn't matter whether you're downtown, over in the Design District, or holed up in the Grove. There's no avoiding it ... You can feel it in your feet, your knees, and your gut.
For the 13th ye ... More >>
Just a few items we tackled in this week's New Times Broward-Palm Beach
print edition.In Music: Pitbull is throwing a party on Sunday. Carnaval Miami and Calle Ocho's guest list includes T-Pain, Flo Rida, Sean Paul, Spam Allstars and a million or so of their closest friends. Someone was also gon ... More >>
If you've been paying attention to the news--and it's almost impossible not to at a time like this--you've no doubt witnessed the horrors our poor Caribbean neighbors in Haiti have endured since a major earthquake registering 7.0 on the Richter mag scale all but obliterated the small impoverished co ... More >>
Brad KuntzDo you find yourself scrambling for something to do every year on New Years Eve? Are you one of those people calling around at the last moment, "Hey! Is so-and-so finally having a party?" and "Hey! So what are you finally doing?" Well, you could end up at a lame party downing a dozen gr ... More >>
Jacob KatelChef Josh Wahler behind premium salt.There were no kicks fast as lightning, it wasn't frightening, and the staff showed expert timing when the Catalina Hotel's Kung Fu Kitchen and Sushi recently hosted South Florida's Chef's Club on their South Beach rooftop lounge.Chef Josh Wahler, of ... More >>
photo by Ben ThackerLanzallamas Monofonica play the Rhythm Foundation stage.Sleepless Night returns this Saturday to Miami Beach. Staying up all night there is nothing new, but the event is way more high-falutin', asking you to stay awake for things like opera and experimental dance. That can see ... More >>
via Flickr user SmakuPlenty to check out in Broward and Palm Beach this weekend, and no matter who you are, you'll find something that will scare you. David Allan Coe, for instance, is playing tonight at Culture Room. He's been known to scare more than a few people in his day. KMFDM are out at Re ... More >>
Well, it's that special time of year kiddies, when real kiddies get to go door to door yelling "trick or treat!" and collecting candy, most of which their grandmothers will warn, "esta envenenado" ("it's poisoned"). Meanwhile, grownup kiddies get to dress like strippers and dipshits (I managed bo ... More >>
Every time we woke up this weekend and looked outside our window, all we could think about how gorgeous the weather was. Perfect weekend to do nothing but relax and soak in the fact that we can enjoy this kind of weather this time of year. And with Winter Music Conference a week away, we are sure we ... More >>
After much Internet gossip and rumor-mongering, the folks behind Langerado announced they would release the first phase of the festival's 2009 lineup yesterday morning. That didn't happen, with a delay as organizers "finalized last-minute details." Still, this morning they've come forward with a few ... More >>
While seemingly the whole highbrow world descends on Miami Beach tonight for the official opening of Art Basel, across the causeway, the Vagabond kicks off the artsy extravaganza with a locals-centric fiesta. Okay, so Miami New Times is an official sponsor of the event, but it’s n ... More >>