Here was the groom: poured into a slim Givenchy tux, hair mowed short, smile big. There was the bride: in Givenchy too — a white dress that modestly sheathed her Jessica Rabbit frame like cloud cover hiding an Alp. And there between the couple, his face bright as a polished coin, was a thin fi ... More >>
The Heat sure do know how to turn a random Monday night game against the Hawks into some serious entertainment. LeBron James had 38 points, eight rebounds, and six assists in the Heat's 120-119 overtime, surprisingly eventful, Monday night win. With the victory, the Heat sweep their five-game home ... More >>
If the Heat wins tonight, it will be a citywide fist punch to the fart box of all the haters around the world. Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook can go back to wearing their lensless glasses in the obscurity of Oklahoma City. And Charles Barkley can quietly choke on his stupid diet meals.Miami can' ... More >>
Last year, we made some rather foolhardy predictions about the NBA finals and ended up with a tattoo of Jason Terry indelibly inked on our pale white ass. So this year, we are avoiding any claims of clairvoyance and appealing to a baser emotion: pure, unbridled hatred.Yes, the Miami Heat are the mos ... More >>
You don't get much different than Seattle and Miami. The differences are as big as Northwest and Southeast, orcas and alligators, Starbucks and cafecitos, and, very literally, apples and oranges. Yet, might Seattle be the only city in America, outside of South Florida, that will be rooting for the H ... More >>
It's an exciting time in South Florida sports. Both the Heat and Panthers appear to be making strong runs at the playoffs. The UM Women's Basketball team is sure to be a threat in the official March Madness (and the men might make it too). The Dolphins are in the midst of a critical off season. A ... More >>
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New Times finally concludes the brouhaha over the brat
Go Marlins! Go Panthers! Go Heat! Go to hell.