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Blogs
December 26, 2011
A South Florida Family Is Suing Over Rights To "Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town"
You've probably never heard of J. Fred Coots, but damned if his ditty hasn't been blowing up your car radio for the past month. Way back in 1934, Coots co-wrote a little tune called "Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town" -- a track that cracks the ten most played songs worldwide almost every year and ha ... More >>
Blogs
December 22, 2011
The Coolest, Craziest, and Most X-Rated Christmas Cookie Cutters
Pipparkakan.comNeed a sugar rush for the long night ahead?Christmas sugar cookies don't exactly reinvent the wheel when it comes to creative pastry. This year, why not go beyond the usual array of standard shapes like snowmen, spruce trees, reindeer and the inevitable jolly man himself, Santa Cla ... More >>
Blogs
December 14, 2011
Great Christmas Gifts for the Food-Obsessed Woman
Uwe Hermann/Creative CommonsIt's the present - not the thought that counts.Santa Claus is due for his yearly breaking and entering campaign, and you're worried that you're not going to be able to find the perfect present for the female foodie in your life.Let Short Order do the shopping for you. ... More >>
Blogs
November 29, 2011
The Fresh Market South Beach Grand Opening Wednesday
The Fresh Market is a lot like Santa Claus and Disney World. Sure you're a jaded non-believer, but then the automatic doors part. You get a simultaneous hit of classical music and the co-mingled scents of cinnamon, cheese, and coffee, and you gladly fork over your rent money for Manchego from Spa ... More >>
Calendar
October 27, 2011
Oye, Carnies and Doughnuts
The Fresh Market is a lot like Santa Claus and Disney World. Sure you're a jaded non-believer, but then the automatic doors part. You get a simultaneous hit of classical music and the co-mingled scents of cinnamon, cheese, and coffee, and you gladly fork over your rent money for Manchego from Spa ... More >>
Blogs
December 23, 2010
Ten Awesome Anti-Christmas Songs to Help Cope with the Holidays
Hardcore band Fear has a message for St. Nick: "Fuck Christmas!"Christmas brings a mixture of emotions to the masses. Dealing with family you haven't seen all year. Remembering why you haven't seen them all year. Being too broke to buy appropriate yet clever crap at Brookstone for everyone. Not ... More >>
Calendar
December 2, 2010
City Beautiful Cheer
Hardcore band Fear has a message for St. Nick: "Fuck Christmas!"Christmas brings a mixture of emotions to the masses. Dealing with family you haven't seen all year. Remembering why you haven't seen them all year. Being too broke to buy appropriate yet clever crap at Brookstone for everyone. Not ... More >>
Blogs
November 20, 2010
Cox Radio Kills 93 Rock and Institutes 24/7 Holiday Music
Kermit says: "Cox Radio killed 93 Rock for Christmas!"The suits at Cox Radio finally replied! Read what they had to say about killing 93 Rock for Christmas. (Then take Crossfade's 93 Rock "Radio Sucks" poll.) Whenever Crossfade wants to flood the interior of our automobiles with a non-stop stream ... More >>
Blogs
October 15, 2010
Blowfly Does XXX-Mas Is a Timeless Wad of Dirty Cheer
Hoe, hoe, hoes!!!Blowfly Blowfly Does XXX-Mas (Pandisc Records) myspace.com/blowfly Christmas comes early this year with that thick, juicy, protein-filled wad of Blowfly love that you've tasted so many times over the last five decades. A true visionary, Clarence Reid, AKA Blowfly, decided to ... More >>
Blogs
October 11, 2010
The '72 Dolphins Got to Pop Champagne Extra Early This Year
The '72 Miami Dolphins will get to hold on to their records as the last NFL team to have a perfect season for another year. It's only week 5, but already every team has suffered the agony of defeat. With the Kansas City Chiefs 19-9 to the Colts, Mercury Morris, Larry Csonka and the rest of the te ... More >>
Blogs
September 10, 2010
Jersey Shore Damage Report: Fight Night
Let's get to ready to ruuuuuuuuuuuumble! Yes, last night was fight night on South Beach for the Jersey Shore crew. We saw the thrilling conclusion to Sammi vs. JWoww, an undercard featuring of Vinny vs Ronni, Snooki vs. Latino dating rituals, Paul vs herpes, Fossil watches vs. smooshing, the enti ... More >>
Blogs
April 19, 2010
Sex Offenders Might Be Banned From Dressing as Santa or Clowns in Florida
With the saga of sex offenders living under the Julia Tuttle Causeway finally coming to something of an end, a new state law seeks to dictate not where registered sex offenders live, but rather how they dress. The Sun-Sentinel reports that criminals convicted of sex crimes involving children woul ... More >>
Blogs
March 16, 2010
Nobody Cares About Saint Patrick's Day in Miami, If Dwarf Performers Have Anything to Say About it
philthepillvia flickr ccShort Dwarf entertainment company is not the most politically correct agency on the planet. They represent "midget talent" -- their words, not ours -- for performance and party gigs nationally. Owners claim to be "your premiere source for leprechauns, elves, oompa lo ... More >>
News
December 24, 2009
Santa's gift: a hoochie
philthepillvia flickr ccShort Dwarf entertainment company is not the most politically correct agency on the planet. They represent "midget talent" -- their words, not ours -- for performance and party gigs nationally. Owners claim to be "your premiere source for leprechauns, elves, oompa lo ... More >>
Blogs
December 18, 2009
Duck You, You Rubber Ducker!
Santa Claus is coming to the Shops at Midtown Miami (3401 N. Miami Ave., in front of Loehman's and West Elm) this Saturday, and he's bringing his rubbers.Rubber ducky reindeer, that is. From 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., Santa and his helpers will set up rubber duck reindeer races for Miami children. (We ca ... More >>
Calendar
December 17, 2009
This Ain’t No Charlie Brown Christmas
Santa Claus is coming to the Shops at Midtown Miami (3401 N. Miami Ave., in front of Loehman's and West Elm) this Saturday, and he's bringing his rubbers.Rubber ducky reindeer, that is. From 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., Santa and his helpers will set up rubber duck reindeer races for Miami children. (We ca ... More >>
Blogs
December 9, 2008
What if Rush Limbaugh Bought The Miami Herald?
The wingnuts at the Free Republic were prematurely dancing on the grave of The Miami Herald yesterday. There's some predictable, irrational bitching about bias in the mainstream media, and then they settle on the idea that, ha ha, Rush Limbaugh should buy The Herald. Which is exactly what you would ... More >>
Calendar
December 4, 2008
The Gay Choir Conspiracy
An international cartel performs holiday refrains.
Calendar
November 20, 2008
You Better Watch Out
The holidays are here, so you can start decking your halls.
Music
February 28, 2008
Mannheim Steamroller
The holidays are here, so you can start decking your halls.
Calendar
January 10, 2008
All-American Lies
Meet pro wrestling legends at Dolphin Mall.
Calendar
January 3, 2008
A Bird in the Grave Equals Two in the Pub
Hear Irish words of wisdom at the Saint Stephen’s Day celebration.
Dining
December 20, 2007
Merry Tapas
Give the gift that keeps them eating.
Calendar
December 13, 2007
’Tis the Season
Give the gift that keeps them eating.
Calendar
November 15, 2007
Yay, Santa!
Get your shopping done early
Calendar
March 29, 2007
Sex On The Beach
Exxxpect the errrotic and exxxotic
Home Entertainment
December 14, 2006
New Times's Top DVD Picks for the Week of December 12, 2006
Exxxpect the errrotic and exxxotic
Music
December 7, 2006
Brave New Christmas
33 alternative holiday jams
Calendar
November 30, 2006
Toys in Three Languages
33 alternative holiday jams
Dining
May 25, 2006
The Real Thing
Xixon delivers an authentic taste of Spain
Music
December 22, 2005
Holiday Dysfunction
It's the crap, crappiest season of all
Calendar
December 8, 2005
Deck the Hulls
It's time for boat parades!
Calendar
April 8, 2004
This Week's Day by Day Picks
It's time for boat parades!
News
January 29, 2004
Miami's B-Movie Mogul
K. Gordon Murray may have invented the weekend kiddie matinee, but don't forget his scowling bikers, howling werewolves, lumbering mummies, brain-sucking monsters, and scheming decapitated heads
Dining
January 8, 2004
Emeril's Coasts
The spirit of America's favorite chef is absent from his Miami Beach namesake
Calendar
December 11, 2003
Lights Fantastic
Where: Pinecrest household. What: Nation's biggest Christmas light display!
Calendar
November 13, 2003
This Week's Day by Day Picks
Where: Pinecrest household. What: Nation's biggest Christmas light display!
Film
December 12, 2002
Beat It
Only band fans need stand in the Drumline
Music
December 12, 2002
It's All Merry
Quick Hit Records makes like Old Saint Nick
City Life
May 17, 2001
Best Small-Town Parade
WinterNational Thanksgiving Day Parade
Music
December 28, 2000
Saint Juke
It's a wonderful life at Fox's
Music
October 26, 2000
Crespo's New 'Do
Merenguero Elvis Crespo finally decides to please himself
Dining
April 13, 2000
Unstable Marketplace
The Fish Market
News
December 30, 1999
The Fall of the Mall
Once a shopping mecca, Omni International has gone from bustling to busted
Music
December 24, 1998
Jingle Decibels
Once a shopping mecca, Omni International has gone from bustling to busted
Calendar
December 3, 1998
NIGHT & DAY
DECEMBER 3-9
Calendar
November 26, 1998
Night and Day
NOV. 26-DEC.2
Music
December 19, 1996
Into the Night
NOV. 26-DEC.2
Music
December 12, 1996
Christmas Top 40
NOV. 26-DEC.2
Music
December 12, 1996
A Sleighful of Yays and Nays
NOV. 26-DEC.2
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