Subject:

Ryan Tannehill

  • Blogs

    October 20, 2014

    Is Ryan Tannehill Actually Good? Quarterback Rolls As Fins Crush Bears

    It's always nice when the good Dolphins show up. Most important, good Ryan Tannehill. Good Ryan Tannehill showed up Sunday. Tannehill was laser-accurate, completing 25 of 32 passes for 277 yards and two touchdowns in a better-than-the-score-indicates-yet-still-booty-clenching-at-times 27-14 Miami ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 29, 2014

    Ryan Tannehill's "F-You" Game Totally Demolished the Raiders in London

    Ryan Tannehill has one question for the haters: How does his pass taste? Fancy yourself a second helping, do you? Following an awkward week that felt like the worst dating show ever titled Joe Philbin Plays Hard To Get , Ryan Tannehill proceeded to rip the long-stemmed-rose out of his coaches hand ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 22, 2014

    Dolphins Were So Bad Against Chiefs That Fins Fans Attacked One Another in the Stands

    Sunday's 34-15 loss to the injury-depleted and talent-deficient Kansas City Chiefs proved that once again the Miami Dolphins have it all wrong. It's painfully obvious, and Dolphins fans can't take it anymore. In fact, the game was so bad that Fins faithful began kicking one anothers' asses in the st ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 15, 2014

    Knowshon Moreno's Elbow Bent the Completely Wrong Direction in Fins Loss to Bills

    Miami has the Dolphins, the greatest most frustrating football team. A week after getting a plethora of good-job-smiley-faces on their Patriots test, the Dolphins came out and bombed their follow-up Buffalo Bills exam 29-10 like they had been out the night before playing Fireball shots flip-cup. E ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 16, 2014

    Lauren Tannehill, Who Forgot Her AR-15 in a Rental Car, Is No Stranger to Guns

    Two hours. That's how long Miami Dolphins First Lady Lauren Tannehill possessed a rented Nissan Rogue January 4. But within those two hours, she somehow found time to nestle her AR-15 -- which three states banned following the Sandy Hook massacre -- into a gray bag, plop it in the back seat, forge ... More >>

  • Calendar

    November 21, 2013
  • Blogs

    November 17, 2013

    Dolphins Beat Chargers, Stay In Playoff Hunt

    The Dolphins entered Sunday's game against the Chargers looking to get back to .500, while at the same time hoping to to return to serious contention for an AFC Wild Card slot. Check, and check. The Fins beat the Bolts Sunday night 20-16. Ryan Tannehill finished 22-35 for 268 yards, one TD, and on ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 15, 2013

    Dolphins vs. Chargers: Louis CK Reacts To Five Things You Should Watch

    Prior to the Monday Night game against the winless Buccaneers, Dolphins players swore up and down all this drama for your mamma would bring them closer together, and propel them to a statement win in front of a National audience. Loyal Dolphins fans pointed their loyal Dolphins finger in your chest ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 7, 2013

    Ryan Tannehill Has the Sixth Best Selling Jersey in the League

    Miami Dolphins fans haven't had a quarterback jersey they could wear for more than a season or two ever since Dan Marino's retirement in 1999. So maybe it's not much of a surprise that Ryan Tannehill jerseys are selling like hotcakes.

  • Blogs

    September 23, 2013

    Dolphins Overcome Falcons 27-23: Julio Jones Is an Alien

    For much of the game yesterday, the Falcons bruised, battered and manhandled the Dolphins along the line of scrimmage, and there was the sense that this Dolphins game would end like so many others we've witnessed in the last decade or so: with a loud, wet fart heard for miles around as fans exited ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 20, 2013

    Dolphins Home Opener: Four Keys to a Victory Against the Falcons

    The Dolphins are now 2-0 for only the second time in a decade, and optimism about the team is all over the place. RYAN TANNEHILL WAS BORN FROM THE BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST! JOE PHILBIN FINALLY NABBED THOSE RASCALLY KIDS -- WATCH OUT, WORLD! COCKCAKES = SUPER BOWL! BRIAN HARTLINE IS A FELINE FRANCISCAN ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 16, 2013

    Dolphins Beat Colts, Luck 24-20

    On the final drive of Sunday's victory over the Andrew Luck-led Colts, there was that creeping feeling the NFL's newest comeback kid would do the thing Dolphins fans are so used to seeing: snatch victory from the jaws of defeat by putting a big ol' dunce hat on the Dolphins and all their silly aspir ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 13, 2013

    Dolphins-Colts: Five Things To Watch For

    Unbelievably, the Dolphins won their season opener for the first time since 2007 last Sunday. EHRRR MERR GERRRSH! The defense was stout, Ryan Tannehill seemed to elevate his game (especially on 3\thirdrd downs), Mike Wallace was already being considered as trade bait for his belly-aching postgame an ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 9, 2013

    Dolphins Top Browns 23-10 in Season-Opening Win, Wallace Whines

    Before yesterday, the Dolphins had been 1-6 in season openers dating back to 2006 -- but lucky for them, the Browns had been a more dismal 1-12 in season openers dating back to their second go-around as a franchise in 1999. The Dolphins took advantage of this by whoopin' some dawg pound ass on the B ... More >>

  • Calendar

    August 29, 2013
  • Calendar

    August 22, 2013
  • Blogs

    July 17, 2013

    Five Questions for the Miami Dolphins as They Head to Training Camp

    Be honest with yourselves, Dolphins fans: After watching two straight ticker-tape parades down Biscayne Boulevard by that other pro team in town, it's gotten harder and harder to get jazzed up for preseason Fins games that basically amount to flag football contests. But this is 2013, and for the fir ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 25, 2013

    Five Players the Dolphins Should Take in Tonight's NFL Draft (and How They'll Screw It Up)

    With the NFL's annual tradition of wealthy, white-haired men selecting young, able-bodied (mostly) black men to perform physical endeavors for comparatively negligible pay aimed at aggrandizing the wealthy men's financial station, we're taking a look at who the Dolphins SHOULD pick -- and how they'l ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 10, 2013

    Miami Dolphins 2012 Season Recap: The Highs, the Lows, the Ireland

    Now that we're firmly entrenched in another playoff season without the Miami Dolphins and the pain of Stephen Ross's absurd season-ending press conference on Monday has faded, it's the perfect time for a cold, hard, slightly inebriated look back at the 2012 season.Ultimately, it was yet another disa ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 31, 2012

    Dolphins Shut Out By Patriots 28-0, Go 7-9 Again

    Sunday's action featured the incredible story of an extraordinary athlete's return from a horrific injury to come back against all odds, put his team on his back and lead that now playoff-bound team to victory just as the hero himself nearly broke one of the most coveted records in NFL lore. That wa ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 31, 2012

    Dolphins Fans Disappointed With Season, Satisfied With Prime Seating Package

    The Miami Dolphins ended another disappointing season Sunday, once again missing the playoffs.Rookie quarterback Ryan Tannehill did his best in his first season, though nothing near fellow playoff-bound rookies Washington's Robert Griffin III, Indianapolis' Andrew Luck and Seattle's Russell Wilson. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 24, 2012

    Dolphins Rout Bills 24-10, Are Knocked Out of the Playoffs Anyway

    The Miami Dolphins trounced the Bills yesterday behind a 3 TD day from Reggie "LaMontelle Pussyhammer" Bush, a balls-up performance from Reshad Jones and an efficient day from Ryan Tannehill that saw the rookie join the 3,000-yard club for the season. However, a few hours later the Fins found out th ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 17, 2012

    Dolphins Throttle Jaguars 24-3 As Tannehill, Bush Thrive

    Oh hooray! The Dolphins beat a pathetic two-win team to prolong our chances for an evenly average season. Fantastic. Ryan Tannehill played flawlessly, Reggie Bush threw down his anaconda sexual organ and the Dolphins trampled a pathetic Jaguars team 24-3. Woooooooooooo!

  • Blogs

    December 14, 2012

    Miami Dolphins Five Keys To Victory Versus Jaguars

    Ah, the Battle for Florida.Former Dolphin Chad 'The Robot' Henne vs. Ryan 'Tanny Boyeee' Tannehill! Revenge for 62-7! Vindication for the loud, smelly fart that 2012 has proven to be! A chance to avoid a fourth losing season in five years! Tough-nosed, physical ... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • Blogs

    December 10, 2012

    Dolphins Fall to Niners 27-13

    The Miami Dolphins have shown a knack all season for hanging with good teams only to vomit into their own pants when the game is on the line. It happened last week against the Patriots and it happened again yesterday against the 49ers as the Dolphins lost 27-13, despite being a field goal away from ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 7, 2012

    Miami Dolphins Five Keys To Victory Versus 49ers

    So it comes to this: your Miami Dolphins take that loooong west coast flight to face the 8-3 San Francisco 49ers. A few weeks ago this looked like a great matchup: a rising Dolphins team with playoff hopes facing the one-time object of our affection, Jim Harbaugh, and the team he turned us down for. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 3, 2012

    Patriots Top Dolphins 23-16 As Tannehill Struggles

    Going into Sunday's contest there was a feeling the Patriots' offense could easily drop 60 points on the Dolphins' atrocious secondary. Instead, Tom Brady had probably his worst game of the season, the defense kept the Fins in it for most of the game and rookie QB Ryan Tannehill had the kind of up-a ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 30, 2012

    Miami Dolphins Five Keys To Victory Versus Patriots

    Let's not kid ourselves.There's a very good chance Tom Brady and Co. are going to come in to Sun Life on Sunday and absolutely destroy the living crap out of our football team. However, the one thing we have going for us is that (hopefully) no one on our team will ever look like as much of a dork as ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 15, 2012

    Miami Dolphins' Five Keys to Victory Versus Bills

    After a 37-3 drubbing at the hands of a lackluster Tennessee Titans team, your Miami Dolphins try to turn things around quickly during a shortened week and salvage what once seemed like a promising, surprising season that had Dolphins fans everywhere singing hymns, hugging one another and seeing TRI ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 13, 2012

    You Can Rent Ryan Tannehill for $5,000 an Hour

    Looks like Ryan Tannehill could use some extra cash. He's renting himself out for the low, low price of just $5,000-an-hour. Of course, all money exchanged between consenting adults is for time and companionship only. Whatever happens during the time, happens.

  • Blogs

    November 12, 2012

    Titans Obliterate Dolphins 37-3 for Worst Home Loss Since 1968

    So how good do you feel about Jeff Ireland and the Dolphins' talent level today?Two weeks after a convincing victory over a floundering Jets team, the Dolphins are 4-5 and facing "must win" scenarios for most of their remaining seven games in order to salvage the season after getting completely blow ... More >>

  • Calendar

    November 8, 2012
  • Blogs

    November 2, 2012

    Miami Dolphins' Five Keys to Victory Versus Colts

    This Sunday the Dolphins travel to Indianapolis to play the Colts and Andrew Luck -- the girl many Dolphins fans wanted to take to the prom, but she was too unattainable so she laughed in our faces in front of the whole cafeteria as chocolate milk sprayed out of our nostrils in embarrassment.Let's l ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 29, 2012

    Special Teams, Defense Fuel Dolphins 30-9 Romp Over Jets

    With the SUPER COLOSSAL ZOMG! CYCLO-SNOW-FRANKEN-PERFECT-MEGA-SUPER-BLABLAZO STORM OF THE MILLENIUM bearing down on the Northeast, the Dolphins crushed the hated Jets 30-9 and rode out of town just before the storm stranded them. Bad. Assssss.

  • Blogs

    October 26, 2012

    Miami Dolphins' Five Keys To Victory Versus Jets

    Your Miami Dolphins, fresh off their bye week, travel to New Jersey to take on the dirty, stinkin' Jets in that cesspool of filth they call a stadium in the Meadowlands. Let's look at five keys for this Sunday's matchup:

  • Blogs

    October 15, 2012

    Dolphins Beat Rams 17-14 Despite Rushing for Only 20 Yards

    The Miami Dolphins are 3-3 today in spite of absolutely listless performances by both teams in a boring game, a second straight game of questionable (read: crappy) officiating and the Dolphins only rushing for a total of 20 yards all game. However, the continued influence of Ryan Tannehill's burgeon ... More >>

  • Calendar

    October 11, 2012
  • Blogs

    October 8, 2012

    Dolphins Pull Out Win Against Bengals Despite Abysmal Officiating

    In a game that featured absolutely putrid calls on the field by the recently-returned "professional" refs, the Dolphins managed to hold off the Cincinnati Bengals for a 17-13 win. An overall sloppy game for both teams was sealed when safety Reshad Jones intercepted Andy Dalton with 1:22 left in the ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 1, 2012

    Dolphins Fall to Cardinals 24-21 in Second OT Loss In A Row

    For the second week in a row, the Dolphins failed to capitalize on opportunities to close out a game and lost an overtime game they should have won. Given the "Cardiac Cards" moniker Arizona has earned as of late, you had to figure this game would get wild towards the end despite three quarters of r ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 24, 2012

    Dolphins Lose to Jets 23-20 After Missed Field Goals, Reggie Bush Injury

    There was a time when kicker Dan Carpenter was responsible for the majority of the points the Dolphins scores, and could be relied upon to line up and bang out a field goal -- from seemingly any distance -- with a twirl of his flowing locks. That time is gone now.The Miami Dolphins lost to the New Y ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 17, 2012

    Miami Dolphins Obliterate the Oakland Raiders 35 - 13

    Facing a below-average Oakland Raiders yesterday, it was generally believed the Dolphins had a very good chance of beating their former AFC rival and notching the first victory for both Head Coach Joe Philbin and QB Ryan Tannehill. Then Reggie Bush came out of nowhere and decided to show everyone hi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 10, 2012

    Dolphins Fall to Texans 30-10 In Season-Opening Flop

    With seven minutes left in the second quarter on Sunday, the Dolphins looked like a team that seemed to have turned the corner. The defense was playing more like the aggressive squad that had played well last year, the Dolphins receivers were catching the ball on offense, rookie quarterback Ryan Tan ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 7, 2012

    Your Miami Dolphins 2012 Season Drinking Game: Drink the Pain Away

    Sure, things might come together for the Miami Dolphins this year. Ryan Tannehill could quickly develop into a stud. Our offense may surprise. Joe Philbin might reveal himself as a true coaching genius in his first season. The team might make the playoffs. You might win the lottery. The polar ice ca ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 30, 2012

    Dolphins Fall to Cowboys 30-13 To End Preseason Winless, Then Crash The Team Plane

    In what is typically the most uninteresting and uneventful of all preseason games, the Dolphins conducted business-as-usual by falling to the Dallas Cowboys 30-13 last night, completing the 2012 preseason with only their third winless effort in franchise history.The Fins followed up in the most appr ... More >>

  • Calendar

    August 23, 2012
  • Calendar

    August 9, 2012
  • Blogs

    June 1, 2012

    Lauren Tannehill Reportedly Shot Dolphins-Themed Maxim Photo Spread

    We might have been a bit grossed out by the amount of borderline-pervy attention Lauren Tannehill, the wife of Dolphins' first-round pick Ryan Tannehill, received after draft day, but apparently she wasn't. She may or may not have already shot a photo spread for Maxim. However, as far as Maxim photo ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 1, 2012

    For Miami Dolphins, Drafting Miami Hurricanes Is Too Little, Too Late

    Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke gives an F to the Miami Dolphins and the Miami Hurricanes underclassmen who left school for the NFL draft.As much I've put t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 27, 2012

    Miami Dolphins Draft Texas A&M Quarterback Ryan Tannehill

    It only took 29 years, but the Miami Dolphins finally grew a pair and used a first round pick to select a quarterback. And that quarterback is Ryan Tannehill of Texas A&M.After getting stiffed by Peyton Manning during the offseason, and feeling pretty meh about Matt Flynn, the Dolphins went ahea ... More >>

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