Reggie Bush

Five Players the Dolphins Should Take in Tonight's NFL Draft (and How They'll Screw It Up)

With the NFL's annual tradition of wealthy, white-haired men selecting young, able-bodied (mostly) black men to perform physical endeavors for comparatively negligible pay aimed at aggrandizing the wealthy men's financial station, we're taking a look at who the Dolphins SHOULD pick -- and how they'l ... More >>

Rihanna's Diamonds Tour, With A$AP Rocky, at BB&T Center April 20

NCAA Claims Nevin Shapiro Gave Out $170,000 to University of Miami Athletes

So how much did convicted Ponzi schemer Nevin Shapiro dole out in impermissible benefits to University of Miami athletes, recruits and coaches? About $170,000, says the NCAA.It sure is easy spending money when it's not really your own, but it's notable that the approximate amount listed by the NCAA ... More >>

Reggie Bush Just "Confused" as He's Desperately Waiting for the Dolphins to Call

Listen Reggie Bush, it's not you. It's the Miami Dolphins. To put things in seasonal perspective: you're basically like someone whose gone a few good dates with someone, and right now you're waiting for the other person to call and make those big time plans for Valentine's Day. The Dolphins are ... More >>

Reggie Bush Not Likely Returning to Dolphins

Reggie Bush may have been one of the bigger names on the Dolphins squad for the past two years, and may have racked up two seasons close to 1,000 yards, but don't expect him to come back.Though Bush has stated he'd like to stay in Miami, it's looking more and more likely that the team won't go out o ... More >>

Alabama Wins Championship In Most Eye-Searingly Boring Title Game Ever

With a matchup between Nick Satan and the preachy half of the Catholics vs Convicts rivalry, South Florida would have been perfectly happy if an epic bout of Montezuma's revenge had cancelled the whole BCS title game last night. Unfortunately for the rest of the country, only one of the teams at Sun ... More >>

Dolphins Rout Bills 24-10, Are Knocked Out of the Playoffs Anyway

The Miami Dolphins trounced the Bills yesterday behind a 3 TD day from Reggie "LaMontelle Pussyhammer" Bush, a balls-up performance from Reshad Jones and an efficient day from Ryan Tannehill that saw the rookie join the 3,000-yard club for the season. However, a few hours later the Fins found out th ... More >>

Dolphins Throttle Jaguars 24-3 As Tannehill, Bush Thrive

Oh hooray! The Dolphins beat a pathetic two-win team to prolong our chances for an evenly average season. Fantastic. Ryan Tannehill played flawlessly, Reggie Bush threw down his anaconda sexual organ and the Dolphins trampled a pathetic Jaguars team 24-3. Woooooooooooo!

This Might Be Reggie Bush's Last Season with the Dolphins

Reggie Bush's contract with the Miami Dolphins is up at the end of the season, and so far there's no indication that the team has any interest in resigning the running back. Bush himself is now openly doubting that he'll be back in aqua and coral next year.

Miami Dolphins' Five Keys to Victory Versus Bills

After a 37-3 drubbing at the hands of a lackluster Tennessee Titans team, your Miami Dolphins try to turn things around quickly during a shortened week and salvage what once seemed like a promising, surprising season that had Dolphins fans everywhere singing hymns, hugging one another and seeing TRI ... More >>

Titans Obliterate Dolphins 37-3 for Worst Home Loss Since 1968

So how good do you feel about Jeff Ireland and the Dolphins' talent level today?Two weeks after a convincing victory over a floundering Jets team, the Dolphins are 4-5 and facing "must win" scenarios for most of their remaining seven games in order to salvage the season after getting completely blow ... More >>

Miami Dolphins' Five Keys to Victory Versus Titans

After two weeks on the road, the Dolphins are back home to face a 3-6 Titans team that ranks near the bottom of the NFL standings on both offense and defense and is a team mired in uncertainty about its future. Will our passing defense display the tenacity of a canned wet fart once again or can we g ... More >>

Terry Bradshaw Says Reggie Bush Was Running Like He Was "Chasing That Bucket of Chicken"

Did you see Reggie Bush's amazing, zig-zaggy touch down run in the second quarter on Sunday against the Indianapolis Colts? Well, Fox analyst Terry Bradshaw did, and in a poor choice of words, described Bush as running like "he was chasing that bucket of chicken." Whoops.

Kanye West Begins Apology Tour in Miami, Hugs Female Paparazzi He (Almost) Slapped

Not everyone thinks that the Reggie-Bush-slept-with-Kim-Kardashian-before-Kanye-West joke is funny. Especially Yeezy himself. So when a local female paparazzo teased West and current girlfriend Kim Kardashian about the Miami Dolphins running back, the notoriously ill-tempered MC lost his shit and ... More >>

Jets Coach Rex Ryan Wants an Apology from Reggie Bush

The Jets are at the bottom of their division, 29th in total offense, 30th in containing opponents' rushing yards, and have just about the most embarrassing quarterback situation in the league. Yet, Rex Ryan seems to be really concerned about Miami Dolphins running back Reggie Bush's manners. 

Dolphins Beat Rams 17-14 Despite Rushing for Only 20 Yards

The Miami Dolphins are 3-3 today in spite of absolutely listless performances by both teams in a boring game, a second straight game of questionable (read: crappy) officiating and the Dolphins only rushing for a total of 20 yards all game. However, the continued influence of Ryan Tannehill's burgeon ... More >>

Kanye West Attacks Female Paparazzi in Miami Over Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian Question

Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are getting into some pretty freaky sex practices. You know, watching each other's sex tapes. And now, public paparazzi beating. How much kink can Kimye take? At least, it seems to be getting Ms. Kardashian off. Just check the cut to see the grin on Kim's face as Kany ... More >>

Cram the Rams

Dolphins Lose to Jets 23-20 After Missed Field Goals, Reggie Bush Injury

There was a time when kicker Dan Carpenter was responsible for the majority of the points the Dolphins scores, and could be relied upon to line up and bang out a field goal -- from seemingly any distance -- with a twirl of his flowing locks. That time is gone now.The Miami Dolphins lost to the New Y ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Obliterate the Oakland Raiders 35 - 13

Facing a below-average Oakland Raiders yesterday, it was generally believed the Dolphins had a very good chance of beating their former AFC rival and notching the first victory for both Head Coach Joe Philbin and QB Ryan Tannehill. Then Reggie Bush came out of nowhere and decided to show everyone hi ... More >>

Your Miami Dolphins 2012 Season Drinking Game: Drink the Pain Away

Sure, things might come together for the Miami Dolphins this year. Ryan Tannehill could quickly develop into a stud. Our offense may surprise. Joe Philbin might reveal himself as a true coaching genius in his first season. The team might make the playoffs. You might win the lottery. The polar ice ca ... More >>

Hard Knocks, Episode 2: Chad Johnson's Epic Groin-Kick to Dolphins Fans

Over the past decade, your Miami Dolphins have resembled a resident of Hiroshima that moved to Nagasaki during World War II to escape the likelihood of bombing. "It's probably much nicer and safer over there," your Dolphins say. Inevitably, they're pretty much screwed either way; it's always an emot ... More >>

Hard Knocks Episode One: Thank God For Chad Johnson

Thank God for Chad Johnson. Last night, the "Look At Me" wide receiver was the star of the first episode of Hard Knocks: Training Camp With The Miami Dolphins on HBO. You get the feeling the Dolphins brain trust of General Manager Jeff Ireland and Head Coach Joe Philbin picked up the boisterous play ... More >>

A-List Altruism

Miami Dolphins Replace Playbooks with iPads, Will Fine Players $10,000 for Improper Use

In a move that will save thousands of pieces of paper a year, the Miami Dolphins have stepped into the digital age and will replace their phonebook-sized paper playbooks this year with iPads. Each player was issued the Apple tablet. Though, that of course means players might be tempted to load up An ... More >>

Dolphins Players Not Thrilled About Being Filmed for Hard Knocks

Are you excited to take a behind the scenes look at the Miami Dolphins on HBO's Hard Knocks? Because the players sure aren't.  Tight end Anthony Fasano says groans echoed through the locker room when the team was informed they'd be pulling double duty as reality TV stars.

Miami Dolphins Will Star in HBO's Hard Knocks Reality Show

What does a celebrity do when they need a quick jolt of publicity to revive a fading career? Reality TV, of course. What does a sports team desperately in need of some public goodwill and attention do when they're being overshadowed in their own city? Apparently, the exact same thing.The Miami Dolph ... More >>

Dolphins Take Down Bills, Still In Last Place

​The Dolphins took down the Buffalo Bills 30-23 in a snowy Orchard Park yesterday. Reggie Bush ran for a career-high 203 yards. It was also their first win without Tony Sparano.With just two games left to play, the Fins victory brings their record to 5-9, putting the team on track for yet another ... More >>

Dolphins Take Down Raiders, Have Four Wins Now

​Amazingly and infuriatingly, the Miami Dolphins have come tromping out of the depths of a shitty season like a reanimated zombie and have suddenly started kicking opponents asses and eating their brains.The Dolphins defense stabbed the Raiders in the face with their ferociousness, while the offen ... More >>

Dolphins Lose On Thanksgiving Day

Your Miami Dolphins played in yesterday's Thanksgiving Day game against the Dallas Cowboys and lost, ending their three-game winning streak and putting their playoff hopes on life support with someone standing by ready to smother it with a pillow. The Dolphins defense did what it could, intercepting ... More >>

Dolphins Party Like It's 2008 With a Three-Game Winning Streak

​The Miami Dolphins beat the struggling Buffalo Bills yesterday 35-8, with help from a defense that hasn't allowed a touchdown in 12 consecutive quarters. Miami's defense created turnovers, set up touchdowns for the offense, and scored a special teams touchdown, suddenly making the Dolph ... More >>

Holy Crap, the Dolphins Won Again!

​Well that about wraps it up for the first overall pick. The Miami Dolphins were able to both grab an early lead and then not vomit all over it by taking down the vaunted indomitable unconquerable mostly shitty Washington Redskins 20-9 yesterday at Sun Life Stadium.The win snaps a seven-game home ... More >>

The Miami Dolphins Even Suck at Sucking

​Finally, just when it mattered the least, when a win couldn't possibly do anything to change the fortunes of this season, this coaching staff, or this fan base's hopes, the Dolphins FINALLY pulled off a victory.Somehow, someway, led by one of the marionette puppets from Team America QB Matt Moore ... More >>

Yeremiah Bell Disses Reggie Bush: "He Stinks"

​There's something rotten in Dolphinville. With the team trudging along winless, fans resorting to a "Suck for Luck" mindset, and a soon-to-be-fired Tony Sparano putting his house on the market, players on the team are understandably frustrated and lashing out like angry kids during a long car rid ... More >>

Dolphins Wait Until Last Possible Moment To Crap Themselves

​The Miami Dolphins dominated pretty much every facet of the game against the Cleveland Browns yesterday, including rushing and passing yards. They even held a 16-10 lead with 43 seconds remaining.But because these are the Dolphins, they decided to go ahead and do that thing where they go all epic ... More >>

Is Reggie Bush Sabotaging Kim Kardashian's Wedding?

​The answer to the question in the headline, depending on your outlook, is either "probably not" or "who the hell cares?" Yet, by virtue of the face that newly minted Miami Dolphin Reggie Bush used to serial-smoosh the crown jewel of the Kardashian empire, the team's media relations people better ... More >>

Miami Dolphins Will Suck Again This Year

​Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke assesses the sad state of Miami's NFL franchise.While AFC division rivals the New England Patriots and the New York Jets ... More >>

Reggie Bush Likely Headed to Miami

via Facebook​New Orleans running back Reggie Bush could be headed to Miami. A potential deal to bring Bush -- who won a Super Bowl ring during his most recent game in Miami -- was reportedly hammered out by Dolphins general manager Jeff Ireland and agent Joel Segal. The final sticking point ... More >>

Oddly, Saints Fans Don't Plan Mass Burning of Reggie Bush Jerseys

​We were under the impression that any time a sports superstar decided to take his talents to South Beach, his former fans erupted in mass hysteria and jersey burning. Perhaps over-eagerly anticipating another LeBron-like situation, The New Orleans Times-Picayune decided to ask its readers if they ... More >>

Letters from the issue of January 6, 2011

Five ways LeBron should embrace his evil side

LeBron James Embraces His Evil Side: 5 Ways The King Can Become a Super-Villain

Like Hulk Hogan before him, LeBron needs to embrace his new evil identity: "Jefe Jaime"​All summer, everybody's been hating on LeBron and the Heat. First, some bitter buckeye called the team evil. Just last week, James was named the sixth most hated athlete in America. So what's a superstar t ... More >>

Top 10 List of Whiteys Who Might Get Away With Using the N-Word

Pets 4 Dawn via flickr Oh no she didn't!​ The second the N word left Dr. Laura Schlessinger's mouth on her nationally syndicated radio show last week she must have known she started another N word related crap storm. Dr. Laura doesn't have near the street cred a white person needs to get a ... More >>

Kim Kardashian Caught Pooping in Hotel Pool

Todd Lashley​After she and Reggie Bush called it quits last week, Kim Kardashian needed a little post-breakup "me" time, so she spent the weekend relaxing at the Cinco Lunas hotel and resort in Miami Beach. As it turns out, the reality-TV starlet and Quick Trim pill pusher got a little too relaxe ... More >>

Guide to Recognizing Your New Orleans Saints

​"Who Dat Nation" has begun its descent on our fair city in advance of the Super Bowl, where the New Orleans Saints will take on the Indianapolis Colts. Fittingly, while the Colts will stay in Fort Lauderdale, the Saints will hang out at the InterContinental Hotel in downtown Miami, and last nigh ... More >>

Super Bowl Pits Kim Kardashian Against Kendra Wilkinson

​You can't even host a Super Bowl in Miami anymore without it having some shallow reality teevee flair. Yes, two of the E! channel's favorite buxom bimbettes will almost assuredly be in the stands at Sun Life Stadium come February 7.That's because Saints star Reggie Bush has been notably tapping t ... More >>

Kim Kardashian's Ass and Cupcakes Overshadow Ocean Drive Party

​Beloved luxury-porn mag Ocean Drive celebrated it's 17th anniversary by putting beloved amateur-porn star Kim Kardashian on its cover and invited her to host their big self-congratulatory party last Thursday at the Delano. Half the point of throwing these parties is to get publicity, but not ... More >>

Kim Kardashian Floats Into the Sunrise...Mall

Photo via kimkardashian.celebbuzz.com​There are very few things that a Kardashian can't do. They can turn forgetting to take your bc pills and unprotected sex into an adorable anecdote! They can force you into the background of your own wedding picture! And now they can materialize in Sunris ... More >>

The Party Crasher - SoBe New Year's Eve 2007: Jennifer Hudson, Adrian Grenier, Ashlee Simpson, and more...