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Blogs
April 26, 2012
Five Reasons Ricky Rubio Is a Better Vice-President Choice Than Marco Rubio
The political world has come down with a crippling case of Rubio-mania. A junior member of the glee club United States Senate, Marco Rubio is Latino, has Tea Partiers in his pocket, and represents Florida, the most important state in the 2012 presidential election. Name him as Mitt Romney's veep, th ... More >>
Blogs
March 5, 2012
Miami Mascot Madness Tournament: Vote For Your Favorite Sports Mascot
It's an exciting time in South Florida sports. Both the Heat and Panthers appear to be making strong runs at the playoffs. The UM Women's Basketball team is sure to be a threat in the official March Madness (and the men might make it too). The Dolphins are in the midst of a critical off season. A ... More >>
Blogs
February 24, 2012
Heat Beat Knicks and Jeremy Lin, Render Linsanity Utterly Linpotent
For the past month or so, we've all had Jeremy Lin spewed on our faces, whether we wanted it or not. Turn on your TV: LIN! Tune into your favorite radio station: LIN! Log on to twitter: LIN! The Republican debates: LIN! Jump in the shower: LIN! Your morning cereal toy prize: LIN!And then Lin and ... More >>
Blogs
January 12, 2012
Heat Miss Roughly A Billion Free Throws, Lose Battle of Lob Cities
In a game that was billed as Lob City East vs. Lob City West, the Heat lost mostly thanks to their inability to hit free throws, as well as some pretty shitty officiating, giving them their second overtime loss in two nights as they fell to the LA Clippers 95-89. It was also the second straight n ... More >>
Blogs
November 28, 2011
Mike Miller Probably Won't Be With The Heat Next Season
Say good bye to Mike Miller Heat fans. He'll likely be the team's biggest casualty following the new deal reached between players and owners. Miller made headlines earlier this month by putting his South Florida home on the market, and it's looking like that wasn't such hasty move.&nb ... More >>
Blogs
September 27, 2011
Wade, James and Bosh to Host Charity All-Star Game at FIU
Dwyane Wade, LeBron James and Chris Bosh haven't played together since the last game of the NBA Finals, and with the lockout in full effect we weren't sure when it would happen again. That's about to change. The trio is expected to announce plan for a charity All-Star game at FIU on Octobe ... More >>
News
September 22, 2011
Shaquille O'Neal wages war against a Miami computer geek
Dwyane Wade, LeBron James and Chris Bosh haven't played together since the last game of the NBA Finals, and with the lockout in full effect we weren't sure when it would happen again. That's about to change. The trio is expected to announce plan for a charity All-Star game at FIU on Octobe ... More >>
Blogs
September 15, 2011
Shaq's Wire-Wearing Mistress and the Extortion Claim
Extortion, espionage, mistresses, and Delonte West's penis. Just how crazy is Shaquille O'Neal's personal life? Last February, local prosecutors met with Vanessa Lopez, a woman claiming to be O'Neal's former mistress, about an alleged extortion plot, according to a Florida Department of Law Enf ... More >>
Blogs
August 3, 2011
Kobe Bryant Sticks Up for LeBron: "Back off Him and Let Him Play"
Last week, the Minnesota Timberwolves' Kevin Love, perhaps eager to have anyone paying attention to him, said that pretty much every player in the NBA was celebrating the Miami Heat's NBA Finals loss and LeBron's collapse. Well, turns out that LeBron still has some defenders in the league outside ... More >>
Blogs
June 10, 2011
Four Facts To Help You Fake Your Way Through an NBA Finals Conversation
Wikimedia Commons user steenslagA clown cries after getting mocked for asking what time the Celtics game was on.The Heat are down 3-2. Dwyane Wade has a busted hip. LeBron James had a triple-double and still, somehow, looked horrible. It was a bad night.But it doesn't have to be a bad day, too. C ... More >>
Blogs
May 11, 2011
Dwyane Wade to Host $12,500 Fantasy Basketball Camp at Fontainebleau
Want to play basketball against Dwyane Wade? Well, an average guy has a pretty good shot at getting on the roster of the Minnesota Timberwolves at this point, but if you don't want to commit to a full NBA season, you can shell out $12,500 to sign up for Dwyane Wade's fantasy basketball camp to be ... More >>
Calendar
March 10, 2011
New-Look Nuggets
Want to play basketball against Dwyane Wade? Well, an average guy has a pretty good shot at getting on the roster of the Minnesota Timberwolves at this point, but if you don't want to commit to a full NBA season, you can shell out $12,500 to sign up for Dwyane Wade's fantasy basketball camp to be ... More >>
Blogs
March 9, 2011
Miami Heat's Ineptitude in the Clutch, As Set to Souljah Boy
The good news is, since their infamous crying episode over the weekend, we finally have found a nickname for the revamped Miami Heat. The bad news is we're starting to wonder whether these John Boehner Boys will ever win a game again.
Blogs
March 4, 2011
Zydrunas Ilgauskas Wants to Make Carmelo Anthony His Tenant
"Oof! You like granite countertops, CP3?"Big Z demands that you pay him two months in advance if you want to come into his house. That's not some strangled And 1 axiom. Zydrunas Ilgauskas-- the 7-foot-3 totem pole at the end of the Miami Heat bench-- has a beautiful townhouse he wants to re ... More >>
Blogs
February 18, 2011
Prunk TV's Greatest Hits: David Banner, Rick Ross, Carmelo Anthony, Mack Maine, and Lil Jon
via SF WeeklyDavid Banner wilding out at SXSW.First off, I want to congratulate David Banner (featured in this week's episode of PrunkTV after the cut) on his induction into the Mississippi Musicians Hall of Fame, alongside Elvis, B.B., and Muddy! David Banner was one of my favorite i ... More >>
Blogs
February 13, 2011
Shakey Situation: Krop High Shouldn't Have Escaped Disqualification
Steve SatterwhiteBernard Wright (center, standing) flanks coach Shakey Rodriguez during their FIU days.This news story will appear in Wednesday's issue of New Times. It includes reporting that was published last week on our news blog, and which was referenced without attribution in this weeke ... More >>
Blogs
January 24, 2011
Ricky Rubio Wants to Play for the Heat, Maybe
Known for his creative Pistol Pete Maravich playing style, shaggy haired Spanish phenom Ricky Rubio was the youngest player to play for the Spanish ACB League when he debuted at the age of 14. Then in June of 2009, when Rubio was 19, he declared himself eligible for the NBA Draft where the Minne ... More >>
Blogs
January 14, 2011
LeBron-less Heat Trounced by Nuggets
The Miami Heat suited up against Denver last night without LeBron James and his karma-fucked ankle. This was also the last game before the Heat return to the east coast where when it's 7:30, it's not actually 10:30. Mix in a dash of Mario Chalmers bricks and a Mike Miller who suddenly treats the ... More >>
Calendar
January 13, 2011
Two Jordans are Better Than One
The Miami Heat suited up against Denver last night without LeBron James and his karma-fucked ankle. This was also the last game before the Heat return to the east coast where when it's 7:30, it's not actually 10:30. Mix in a dash of Mario Chalmers bricks and a Mike Miller who suddenly treats the ... More >>
Blogs
December 9, 2010
Heat Take Down Jazz, Extend Win-Streak to Six
The Miami Heat overcame a raucous Salt Lake City crowd and a few relentless Utah Jazz rallies and came away with the 111-98 victory against the vaunted Jazz last night. It was the team's sixth straight victory after their much ballyhooed loss to the Dallas Mavericks three weeks ago when LeBr ... More >>
Blogs
November 12, 2010
Heat Fall to the Celtics, Drop to 5-4
"It's reality now. The chemistry isn't at the level of these good teams." So said LeBron James following the Heat's 112-107 loss the Boston Celtics Thursday night at the American Airlines Arena. The Heat have now dropped 13 of the last 14 regular season meetings to the Celtics, have fallen t ... More >>
Blogs
November 11, 2010
As Heat Prepare for Celtics Tonight, Hater Schadenfreude Blows Up The Internet
Let's hate these three with everything we got. Ready? 1, 2, 3... HATE!!!The Miami Heat host the Boston Celtics tonight at the American Airlines Arena. But did you know Miami is 5-3 eight games into the 2010-11 NBA season? They are! And because they've turned into The Most Irrationally Reviled Tea ... More >>
Blogs
November 2, 2010
2010 Election Results Live Blog
Will Florida gets its first female Governor? Will the country's first female Speaker of the House be forced to turn in her gavel? Will Kendrick Meek somehow shock the world by winning? Did anyone bother to get to know enough about the CFO race to bother voting? Join us tonight as we live blog the ... More >>
Blogs
October 26, 2010
Computers: Miami Heat Has 100 Percent Chance of Making Playoffs
The NBA regular season kicks off tonight with the Miami Heat taking on the Boston Celetics. Those 82 games seem to be just a formality for the Heat, because AccuScore's jocky computers have declared that without even 0.1 percent of a doubt, the team will make the playoffs. Though AccuScore&n ... More >>
Calendar
October 21, 2010
Boo Beasely?
The NBA regular season kicks off tonight with the Miami Heat taking on the Boston Celetics. Those 82 games seem to be just a formality for the Heat, because AccuScore's jocky computers have declared that without even 0.1 percent of a doubt, the team will make the playoffs. Though AccuScore&n ... More >>
Blogs
August 30, 2010
Carmelo Anthony (or a Twitter Hacker) Offers $5K to Smack Kat Stacks
Slapping Kat Stacks has become America's new national past time. Now Denver Nuggets basketball star Carmelo Anthony apparently wants in on the action. Aventura resident Kat Stacks has made a bizarre career out of allegedly sleeping with Z-list rappers with Muppet names (think Gudda Gudda) and then ... More >>
Blogs
August 13, 2010
Even the Dolphins' Brandon Marshall Wants to Play for the Heat
Brandon Marshall probably would have been the biggest accusation of the off season for a Miami team if it wasn't for that whole LeBron thing. Maybe he was worried we forgot about him, so he decided to say something ridiculous to garner some attention. See Marshall thinks there'll definitely be an ... More >>
Blogs
July 23, 2010
Michael Beasley "Smoked Too Much Marijuana" While With the Heat
Michael Beasley, once billed as the Heat's promising next star, is now playing for the lowly Minnesota Timberwolves, and the GM for that team offered an explanation for why Beasley never delivered on his promise with the Heat: He was smoking too much pot. But don't worry, ... More >>
Blogs
July 21, 2010
Miami Heat Lands the Prized Free Agent of 1996
Even after 14 long years, Pat Riley is a man who gets what he wants. Why? Because he's Pat Frickin' Riley, that's why. The Miami Heat signed free agent forward Juwan Howard yesterday to the veteran's minimum of $1.4 million. Back in 1996, and with much fanfare, Howard signed a $101 million deal ... More >>
Blogs
May 28, 2010
Ex-Heat Star Antoine Walker Files for Bankruptcy
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
March 4, 2010
Punch the Magic Dragon
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
February 18, 2010
Sometimes No Move Is the Best Move of All
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
February 11, 2010
Cooking Up Some Suck
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
January 7, 2010
All Aboard the Energy Bus
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
December 24, 2009
The Other O’Neal
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
December 17, 2009
Even Odenless, Still Dangerous
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Calendar
December 17, 2009
To Booz or Not to Booz?
via Wiki CommonWhile his ex-fiance Evelyn Lozada is living it up on the hit show Basketball Wives, former Heat star Antoine Walker has filed for bankruptcy. The forward helped the Heat secure their 2006 NBA championship, but his professional life has faltered ever since.The bankruptcy was filed last ... More >>
Blogs
November 9, 2009
News Roundup
Hurricane Ida is heading for the Gulf of Mexico. [CBS4]A pilot is dead after crashing his small plane in the Everglades last night. [NBCMiami]PoliticsMarco Rubio's record in the State House isn't nearly as conservative as he'd have you believe. It's almost like it's difficult to be a true conservati ... More >>
Calendar
March 12, 2009
His Blood Is Like Gatorade
Hurricane Ida is heading for the Gulf of Mexico. [CBS4]A pilot is dead after crashing his small plane in the Everglades last night. [NBCMiami]PoliticsMarco Rubio's record in the State House isn't nearly as conservative as he'd have you believe. It's almost like it's difficult to be a true conservati ... More >>
Calendar
February 12, 2009
Duel of the Guards
Who will be the last man standing, um, dribbling?
Calendar
February 7, 2008
Jaded Fan, Meet Dwyane Wade
Despite a season of horrors, his greatness is still worth watching.
Calendar
January 17, 2008
Standing Pat
Can Riley’s statements take the Heat?
Calendar
December 20, 2007
Bottling Boozer
Can Riley’s statements take the Heat?
Calendar
March 8, 2007
What a Difference a Year Makes
Can Riley’s statements take the Heat?
Calendar
February 2, 2006
Young Sparks of the NBA
Can Riley’s statements take the Heat?
News
December 1, 2005
Unofficially Worthy
Basel is the original fair, but that means NADA to this crowd
News
March 5, 1998
Dream Team
For years Miami Senior High School has fielded one of the best basketball teams in the nation. But getting into the record books has meant tossing out the rule books.

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