Subject:

Matt Moore

  • Blogs

    August 28, 2014

    Five Questions Heading Into the Dolphins' Last Preseason Game

    The Miami Dolphins complete their preseason schedule tonight against the St.Louis Rams, and a lot of questions still remain. Entering the 2014-15 season, the team wants to change its mediocre ways and get back into the playoffs for the first time still 2010. If that is to happen, a lot of things mus ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 23, 2014

    Miami Heat Playoffs: 50 Twitter Accounts True Fans Must Follow

    What's better than watching the Miami Heat battle for its third consecutive NBA title? Sharing that experience with Heat fans just as passionate about the team as you, while at the same time getting the best possible up-to-the-dribble coverage all in the same place -- that's what. All you have to do ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 13, 2013

    Dolphins-Colts: Five Things To Watch For

    Unbelievably, the Dolphins won their season opener for the first time since 2007 last Sunday. EHRRR MERR GERRRSH! The defense was stout, Ryan Tannehill seemed to elevate his game (especially on 3\thirdrd downs), Mike Wallace was already being considered as trade bait for his belly-aching postgame an ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 5, 2013

    Dolphins Fall to Cowboys 24-20 in Hall of Fame Game

    Welp. At least those uniforms really pop in HD!!! Coach Joe Philbin and company were supposed to go out and show the world that the New Look Dolphins were not just about a new logo that looks like a whale penis and some flashy clothes that would make a World Football League team jealous. Instead, t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 10, 2013

    NFL Would Contribute $150 Million to Sun Life Stadium Face-Lift

    As the county commission meets today to consider a proposed deal to renovate Sun Life Stadium, news comes that the NFL has decided to chip in $150 million of the estimated $480 million it would cost to Flip This House, leaving the county and the Dolphins with $350 million to cover. The deal als ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 2, 2012

    Miami Dolphins' Five Keys to Victory Versus Colts

    This Sunday the Dolphins travel to Indianapolis to play the Colts and Andrew Luck -- the girl many Dolphins fans wanted to take to the prom, but she was too unattainable so she laughed in our faces in front of the whole cafeteria as chocolate milk sprayed out of our nostrils in embarrassment.Let's l ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 29, 2012

    Special Teams, Defense Fuel Dolphins 30-9 Romp Over Jets

    With the SUPER COLOSSAL ZOMG! CYCLO-SNOW-FRANKEN-PERFECT-MEGA-SUPER-BLABLAZO STORM OF THE MILLENIUM bearing down on the Northeast, the Dolphins crushed the hated Jets 30-9 and rode out of town just before the storm stranded them. Bad. Assssss.

  • Blogs

    September 7, 2012

    Your Miami Dolphins 2012 Season Drinking Game: Drink the Pain Away

    Sure, things might come together for the Miami Dolphins this year. Ryan Tannehill could quickly develop into a stud. Our offense may surprise. Joe Philbin might reveal himself as a true coaching genius in his first season. The team might make the playoffs. You might win the lottery. The polar ice ca ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 5, 2012

    Hard Knocks, Episode Five: The Bachelorette Look Like American Gladiators By Comparison

    Cheer up, third-round pick/emo perpetually sad-faced tight end/ likely-illustrator-of-fantastical-scenes-involving-dragons-and-Asian-counterculture-anti-heros-during-team-film-sessions / wouldn't-make-any-other-team's-53-man-roster-except-the-piece-of-shit-Jets Michael Egnew - HBO's Hard Knocks feat ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 4, 2012

    Dolphins Releasing David Garrard: Still Have Three Whatever Quarterbacks Left

    Kind of like the last-place finisher in a footrace between a tortoise, a sloth, a three-legged pug and a snail, David Garrard is officially the loser in this season's Dolphins QB contest. According to multiple sources, including Fox Sports' Jay Glazer, Garrard will be officially released by the team ... More >>

  • Calendar

    August 23, 2012
  • Calendar

    August 9, 2012
  • Blogs

    August 8, 2012

    Hard Knocks Episode One: Thank God For Chad Johnson

    Thank God for Chad Johnson. Last night, the "Look At Me" wide receiver was the star of the first episode of Hard Knocks: Training Camp With The Miami Dolphins on HBO. You get the feeling the Dolphins brain trust of General Manager Jeff Ireland and Head Coach Joe Philbin picked up the boisterous play ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 3, 2012

    Dolphins' David Gerrard Is Apparently Better Than Peyton Manning

    The Dolphins lost the "suck for Luck" contest, and didn't even come close to winning the Peyton Manning, but boy they sure did come in first place in the David Gerrard invitational. And, that might not be the worst thing ever. Sports Illustrated writer Peter King claims that Gerrard is looking ... More >>

  • News

    June 14, 2012
  • Culture

    June 14, 2012
  • Blogs

    May 1, 2012

    For Miami Dolphins, Drafting Miami Hurricanes Is Too Little, Too Late

    Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness once made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke gives an F to the Miami Dolphins and the Miami Hurricanes underclassmen who left school for the NFL draft.As much I've put t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 19, 2012

    Tim Tebow to the Dolphins? Please, Everyone, Shut Up

    ​So, Peyton Manning has chosen to play for the Denver Broncos, which officially ends the reign of Tebowmania in Colorado.What does that mean for the Dolphins? The sports media has already cued up the Tebow-to-Miami talks. We'd rather they hit the kill button. Nothing about that makes sense.

  • Blogs

    March 16, 2012

    Peyton Manning Won't Be a Dolphin: So, Um, Who Is Available in the 2013 Draft?

    ​Peyton Manning has officially told the Miami Dolphins he won't be suiting up in aqua and orange next season. It's another embarrassing failure for owner Stephen Ross and GM Jeff Ireland, and there's even some suggestions that Manning only took the meeting with the Fins as a favor to Dan Marino. O ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 30, 2012

    After Pretty Much Single-Handedly Winning the Pro Bowl, Brandon Marshall Wants a Better QB in Miami

    ​There's a reason the Miami Dolphins pay Brandon Marshall all that money. He's a damn good wide receiver. That's a fact he reminded everyone of with his MVP performance in yesterday's Pro Bowl; the kind of performance we see far too little of when he's actually in a Dolphins jersey.After the game, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 24, 2012

    In Most Obvious Statement Ever, Jeff Ireland Says Dolphins Need a QB Upgrade

    ​In remarks to the media today, Miami Dolphins General Manager Jeff Ireland said, "We need a quarterback that can get us over the hump." Though he praised Matt Moore's solid and reliable mediocrity, he said the Dolphins "have to do better."Ireland is clearly a man with a singular vision and deep k ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 2, 2012

    In Jason Taylor's Final Game, Dolphins End Jets' Season

    ​Jason Taylor played in the final game of his career yesterday. And what better way for him to go out than to bang the New York Jets' season right in its ear hole, and send them back home with nothing. The Jets, needing a win (and a little help) to get into the playoffs, came into SunLife Sta ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 30, 2011

    New York Jets: Respected Rivals or Worst Team Ever?

    ​Miami's had a tough football year, and that's putting it nicely. But it's about to get even worse, when the city's droves of New York and New Jersey transplants take to the streets, the bars, and Sun Life Stadium clad in green to support the Jets in the last game of the regular season. On New Yea ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 16, 2011

    The Ten Biggest Miami Losers of 2011

    ​Two thousand eleven is almost over, and some of us had better years than others. For most, this year seemed like a downer. But, hey, at least you didn't accidentally spend almost $20K at a strip club, get recalled from office, or embarrass yourself on national television. It really could have bee ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 12, 2011

    Dolphins Pummeled By Eagles, Still Need A Quarterback, Possibly a New Coach Too

    ​The Philadelphia Eagles helped head coach Andy Reid win the Mustachioed Overweight Coach Who Has Overstayed His Welcome Bowl when they blew away the Dolphins 26-10 yesterday. The Dolphins have ensured themselves their third straight losing season, falling to 4-9, and remain dead-last in the AFC E ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 5, 2011

    Dolphins Take Down Raiders, Have Four Wins Now

    ​Amazingly and infuriatingly, the Miami Dolphins have come tromping out of the depths of a shitty season like a reanimated zombie and have suddenly started kicking opponents asses and eating their brains.The Dolphins defense stabbed the Raiders in the face with their ferociousness, while the offen ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 25, 2011

    Dolphins Lose On Thanksgiving Day

    Your Miami Dolphins played in yesterday's Thanksgiving Day game against the Dallas Cowboys and lost, ending their three-game winning streak and putting their playoff hopes on life support with someone standing by ready to smother it with a pillow. The Dolphins defense did what it could, intercepting ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 21, 2011

    Dolphins Party Like It's 2008 With a Three-Game Winning Streak

    ​The Miami Dolphins beat the struggling Buffalo Bills yesterday 35-8, with help from a defense that hasn't allowed a touchdown in 12 consecutive quarters. Miami's defense created turnovers, set up touchdowns for the offense, and scored a special teams touchdown, suddenly making the Dolph ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 14, 2011

    Holy Crap, the Dolphins Won Again!

    ​Well that about wraps it up for the first overall pick. The Miami Dolphins were able to both grab an early lead and then not vomit all over it by taking down the vaunted indomitable unconquerable mostly shitty Washington Redskins 20-9 yesterday at Sun Life Stadium.The win snaps a seven-game home ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 7, 2011

    The Miami Dolphins Even Suck at Sucking

    ​Finally, just when it mattered the least, when a win couldn't possibly do anything to change the fortunes of this season, this coaching staff, or this fan base's hopes, the Dolphins FINALLY pulled off a victory.Somehow, someway, led by one of the marionette puppets from Team America QB Matt Moore ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 31, 2011

    The Dolphins Nearly Pulled It Off This Time. Honestly!

    The Flying Bag of Penis that is the Miami Dolphins nearly went and fucked things up by almost winning a game yesterday. But Suck For Luck is alive and well after the New York Giants woke up from their zombie-like state and handed Miami their seventh loss of the season in a 20-17 final.Understandably ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 25, 2011

    Dolphins Sign J.P. Losman As Latest QB, But Does Anyone Really Care Anymore?

    ​There's some sort of collection of men purporting to be a football team who still suit up every Sunday in the Dolphin's traditional aqua and orange and attempt to play something vaguely resembling pro football. It's almost cute how they're still pretending to even compete. In their latest mov ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 24, 2011

    Dolphins Blow 15-Point Lead, Win Suck For Luck Bowl

    ​With their defense flying around making plays and their offense opting for touchdowns instead of field goals, all signs pointed to the Miami Dolphins getting their first win of the season. FUCK YEA!But then Tim Tebow dialed up the Jesus, led the Denver Broncos in erasing a 15-point deficit, tied ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 18, 2011

    Miami Dolphins: The Suckiest Bunch of Sucks That Ever Sucked A Suck

    ​Watching the Miami Dolphins is like opening a gift and expecting something other than a box full of dicks. And that box full of dicks is now 0-5 after a 24-6 loss to their hated rival New York Jets on Monday Night Football.So the bad news is, the Dolphins remain winless and are in last place ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 17, 2011

    Tony Sparano and Jeff Ireland Likely to Find Themselves Unemployed After the Season

    ​In news that shouldn't surprise anyone, The Miami Herald reports that Stephen Ross is mentally preparing to send a pink slip to both Dolphins head coach Tony Sparano and general manager Jeff Ireland. Interestingly however, Ross apparently has a bit of "Suck for Luck" fever, and is hoping to bring ... More >>

  • News

    August 18, 2011
  • Blogs

    July 29, 2011

    As Kyle Orton Talks Stall, Stephen Ross Promises Dolphins Will Add Another Quarterback

    Another year without a true successor to Marino?​Rest assured, Dolfans, your team's hunt for another quarterback isn't over. Owner Stephen Ross told the media today he expects the team to sign somebody. Possibly even anybody. Just don't hold your breath hoping that anybody is necessarily going to ... More >>

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